Not going to try and talk you into a caliber debate, but you also need to keep an open mind and consider that the reason you don't hear or see this approach in 9mm is because it is over 100 years old and many folks have tried it before any of us were born... and found it to be ill advised.
The 9mm Luger is not a rimmed design like a revolver. A revolver in this context will run with a heavy roll crimp and since those were revolvers with different characteristics than a semi, that was for both accuracy and to prevent having a wheel lock. Terminal ballistics is cold comfort if there is a failure to fire due to an ammo issue.
Enter the 9mm, and this is a headspace on the mouth round, not on the rim. So, most of the cast bullets for a 9mm will not look like a typical Keith that has the large diameter sharp flat nose and crimp grooves. If a 9mm bullet starts down the road of trying to run something more than a truncated cone, there is the danger of a set-back due to sharp hardcast corners catching on ramps. When this happens, it raises pressure or causes jams. That is a long winded way of telling you that feed reliability in a 9mm is one reason you don't encounter much of what you are wanting to hear.
If you go down this road you will take on lots of testing to learn why the semi-autos run either a large radius or at most a truncated cone with a wadcutter diameter well behind it. Functional reliability and safety against set-back is the main reason. Lots of work goes into defensive hollow point designs to insure the nose doesn't create jams or set-back. The hollow points for hunting and defense and the hardcast hunting designs that work in revolvers are not the same as the ones that work in semi.
For example. On the left is truncated cone for a 9mm, on the right is for a revolver. These are not the same performance but you can get pretty close to what you are asking for and cast and PC coat them yourself, but you will have to work out the seating depth for reliability.
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Here is an off-the=shelf option that is already coated.
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While you are running your search and testing, I would include some of the Hornady Critical Duty ammo and see how she likes it. Lots of practice with a cheap round nose of the same weight will do what you are asking while you search. If you are dead set against a hollow point, than a cheap plated FMJ should cover her till you find a mold you like. Good Luck in your search and in for the range reports.
