Army or Marines, which one eats more crayons?

[Bender]

Which branch slacks the most and has the lowest IQ?

 

[FS1]

The Marines only eat Crayons, when they are in the shit and need to pull a Rainbow Unicorn out of their ass. The Army eats them to shit out Camo make-up.

 

[ForgeValley]

ok, I'll play.

 

[j-huskey]

I know two crayon eating marines who will also eat your fingers if you grab at their crayons....
Reminds me of a grumpy old bulldog we had.
Devil Dogs rule bubba Bender, watch your fingers.
Havent seen any pink jarhead camo pics in gay berets, now have you ?

 

[Bender]

Hahahaha!!!

 

[buffalowinter]

 

[AIAW]

The way the USMC gets funded I wouldn't be surprised if the crayons didn't first belong to the Army - possibly with a bite already taken out.

 

[j-huskey]

Playing with knives as a child, so shocking ??

Grows up to chasing pussy with a knife, while crawling past armed insurgents, whispering, "here kitty kitty kitty!"

And we note, female kitty. Question is Buff, did he screw her to death or...??????

Buff, sir !!!
Why u put pink thing on horses head...

I'm disappointed, Snake Eater didnt put up snake pic...???

 

[j-huskey]

Even the Russians are picking up on it...

 

[MarinePMI]

 

[brianf]

the marines only eat crayons because thats all the navy gives

 

[Slash0311]

Years ago I read an article in Readrrs Digest in Humor in Uniform. There was a line about the Marines being a department of thd Navy and the author replied "yeah, the mens department." That seemed like something I should remember to use one day.

A few years later, I'm with a group of guys on a work crew. One guy seemed a little off and always wore a bandana around his neck. Several days go by and I'm getting to know this guy and finally he says the magic words... Marines are a department of the Navy. I bust out my reply and we all laugh.

Before the group wrapped up our work, this guy was a Vietnam Vet, original snake eater, and wore the bandana to cover a knife wound scar from fighting hand to hand.

Of all the guys in the world to bust my quote on... so, yes! I eat crayons. Which were preferred over MREs or bag nasties...

 

[VP47PPC]

How the NAVY draws

 

[VP47PPC]

 

[oneshot86]

The "Bag Nasty"

just how in the hell could any mortal, fuck up a sak lunch more???

its like it was on poipose

 

[MarinePMI]

And then you have the in between of MRE's and bag nasties....T-Rats. Ugh....

 

[101stinfantry]

Lol! I've met booger eaters from all four branches (I don't count Coasties as a branch). I've also known, and or met some really good guys from all four as well.

 

[Redmanss]

Potato go boom.

 

[ArmyJerry]

Marines are without doubt the dumbest mother fuckers that walk the tundra. Just plain gullible, a retard IQ level stupid.

but ya gotta love em like you would love a retarded or handicapped child...

 

[myronman3]

Outside of infantry and sf, i had more respect for the marines than the army. The marines i’ve met were the only ones that could undertand the level of discipline i expect from a soldier. And quite honestly, i was disappointed in a lot of the infantry soldiers i knew.

 

[Skunk]

I wouldn't be surprised if the army awards a crayon ribbon in boot camp. Oh, wait....

 

[Deleted member 10043]

That is a tough one having worked with both. Army tends to try and reach an objective systematically and a single sniper warrants stacked CAS. Marines tend to hurt everything with less, including less socks. To quote a Russian study, " while the Army aimed to push the enemy back with incremental application of force, the Marines sought to annihilate him from the start." Don't know if this still applies today.

 

[clcustom1911]

Based my personal experiences being a Corpsman with my Marines, I fixed many crayon eaters.... However...

My brother did 12 years Marines (SSgt) and about to finish 8 in the Army (CWO3, Blackhawk pilot) for his full 20...

He is 100% sure the Army has more aforementioned crayon eaters. He's a smart guy, but could be projecting...

 

[MarinePMI]

That is a tough one having worked with both. Army tends to try and reach an objective systematically and a single sniper warrants stacked CAS. Marines tend to hurt everything with less, including less socks. To quote a Russian study, " while the Army aimed to push the enemy back with incremental application of force, the Marines sought to annihilate him from the start." Don't know if this still applies today.

I'd say that that still holds true. It's one of the reasons Marines suck as "peace keeping" forces. Kind of like having a pyro guarding a fireworks stand....just asking for problems.

 

[VP47PPC]

My son was an 11B and off all his buds from his unit I knew the prior service Marine was by far the sharpest.

 

[j-huskey]

I'd say that that still holds true. It's one of the reasons Marines suck as "peace keeping" forces. Kind of like having a pyro guarding a fireworks stand....just asking for problems.

ABSOLUTELY thank the greater power for crayon eating Jarheads that destroy/annihilate everything in their path....
They are a very valuable part of what makes America a winner... and makes the Russians and other shit think twice about fucking with America.
All crayon donations accepted, send to Camp Pendleton, San Diego, CA 92055 USA...

 

[clcustom1911]

All crayon donations accepted, send to Camp Pendleton, San Diego, CA 92055 USA...

My BAS was 43506 Del Valle . Pulgas.

 

[sandwarrior]

It's hard to say....Crayons taste better than MRE's.

 

[Huskydriver]

Couple observations over the years of my time in the army...

The Marines don't care how retarded they are or how stupid an activity is so long as they look good doing it.

The Army doesnt go anywhere without designing 3 new participation ribbons.

We have to decide on a new style of head gear, PC, boonie, baret, etc...

We then have to make a new combat uniform with matching ta-50....

Eventually we have to design a new dress uniform to put the new campain ribbons on....


The Marines would rather send a platoon into a house and get a bunch of guys shot up cuz Rah...where the Army would just call and hit it with a hellfire and move on.

The Marines and the Army both stop bullets equally well and so they are both alright I'm my book for volunteering to serve.

But seriously Army all the way if you graduated high school and can read and write ?.

 

[ArmyJerry]

Yep pretty uniform. But not that good at th he soldiering part in my experience. Could not even grasp basic concepts like extra ammo. Extra arty ..extra anything... always want to fix bayonetts and charge like idiot's pi ts. Then talk shit about how many marines got killed in this battle or that battle. Not smart. Not sharp.

Absoloute worst officer I ever met was a former enlisted jarhead the cane back through ocs. The worst and got his ass beat badly. Lost a go e4 because of him... colonel moved him out of our line unit to hhc supply.

My son was an 11B and off all his buds from his unit I knew the prior service Marine was by far the sharpest.

 

[oneshot86]

the chicks dig the fix bayonetts part

 

[VP47PPC]

Then talk shit about how many marines got killed in this battle or that battle. Not smart. Not sharp.

By sharp I meant smart, smartest of the bunch. Like our DI told us "not the uniform that make the man, its the man that makes the uniform".

 

[ArmyJerry]

Not my experience at all

 

[oneshot86]

lol

 

[sandwarrior]

By sharp I meant smart, smartest of the bunch. Like our DI told us "not the uniform that make the man, its the man that makes the uniform".

I've seen more dirtbags in the Army than I've seen in the Marines. I've seen 'em in both, and they both ate crayons.

 

[AIAW]

So basically E-3 and below you are just a huge POS.

You make it to O-4 then everyone wants to drink scotch with you and smoke cigars.

Let's not leave out the Navy now...

 

[oneshot86]

thats the ticket, we both have crayon eaters, maybe a little more in the army, but...

 

[MarinePMI]

Y

Absoloute worst officer I ever met was a former enlisted jarhead the cane back through ocs.

Even the Marines have to suffer from the infamous "10%" (that 10% that fuck up everything and are either worthless, or as Doc (@clcustom1911 ) can probably attest, spent their career as "sick, lame, lazy, crippled or crazy" visiting BAS on a regular basis).

All that being said, said former jarhead went into the Army afterwards. As an officer. And the Army accepted him.

'nuff said (though I am sorry to hear you lost a man because of a retarded mustang).

 

[ArmyJerry]

Lost to jail not enemy. Court martial for striking an officer. Only time I seen it in 8 years active and 3 in the guard.

 

[MarinePMI]

Marines are not immune to some of the douche baggery (especially with officers). Classic case just popped up that reinforces that....

https://www.kmbc.com/article/it-was...a3Rwi-dPkwvs3UNHhNi4YYzz_giHva6V2obURwOkFFXek

Sounds like a bunch of panty waisted, promotion eager zeros were trying to clear space for themselves to move up by the sounds of it....fucking turds should be fried.

 

[clcustom1911]

Even the Marines have to suffer from the infamous "10%" (that 10% that fuck up everything and are either worthless, or as Doc (@clcustom1911 ) can probably attest, spent their career as "sick, lame, lazy, crippled or crazy" visiting BAS on a regular basis).

All that being said, said former jarhead went into the Army afterwards. As an officer. And the Army accepted him.

'nuff said (though I am sorry to hear you lost a man because of a retarded mustang).

MALINGERING!!! I hated those dudes!!!

 

[Dirty D]

...(I don't count Coasties as a branch)...

Having spent 4 1/2 years in the Coast Guard I agree with you, the USCG has funding levels that make the Girl Scouts LOL, worn out equipment and sometimes play with the DoD but sometimes don’t. It’s a clusterfuck but we got our job done. As far as the haters, well they can just stay mad about their ASVAB scores. ?‍

 

[ArmyJerry]

I only have one other experience in the Army with a former marine, he got broke bad, almost dead broken, I can give details but its likely he searches his own name and he would recognize me and he'd have to be broken again because he is that fucking stupid... and he does think himself that much of a badass even after dieing on the table and staying in the hospital for 3 months from someone trying to twist is arm off his fucking body while crushing his fucking bucket head... Mr fucking Jarhead jujitsu vs Army judo / taekwando,,,,, jumping a muther fucker from behind sitting at a barracks table playing spades.

Other than those two I just look at jarhead jarheads as good troops with "fancy pants" class A's, major league shit talkers, no better no worse that their Army counterparts except for lack of decent equipment.

I have a nephew graduating jarhead bootcamp next week, my bro inlaw died while he was finishing last year of highschool, track and field as well as major league wrestler, I hope they dont fill his heard with too much bullshit. He has a US Army ranger body but joined the Marines, I will choke him out a few times when he gets home to keep him humble (ish).

 

[Redmanss]

Marines are not immune to some of the douche baggery (especially with officers). Classic case just popped up that reinforces that....

https://www.kmbc.com/article/it-was...a3Rwi-dPkwvs3UNHhNi4YYzz_giHva6V2obURwOkFFXek

Sounds like a bunch of panty waisted, promotion eager zeros were trying to clear space for themselves to move up by the sounds of it....fucking turds should be fried.

I was in J-Bad when that one went down. That whole case was pure kangaroo court and politics to suck Karzai's dick. The investigators completely fell for Taliban propaganda instead of actually doing their job, and the Marine Corps thought he and his men would just go away quietly. Galvin wasn't that kind of man. Bravo-Zulu to him.

 

[Marinevet1]

My experience's have taught me that, yes there are some Marines that may be crayon eaters, along with most of the enlisted, and all of the commissioned officers in the Army, the difference is that all of the Army guys also eat that first grade paste.............you know that white creamy stuff.........which also leads them to eating white creamy stuff later in life...........get that Jerry

Hoka Hey

 

[ArmyJerry]

dude, you are the one in the navy...stop talking about being a cum sluper, keep that shit in house, it disgusts the Army

My experience's have taught me that, yes there are some Marines that may be crayon eaters, along with most of the enlisted, and all of the commissioned officers in the Army, the difference is that all of the Army guys also eat that first grade paste.............you know that white creamy stuff.........which also leads them to eating white creamy stuff later in life...........get that Jerry

Hoka Hey

 

[Deleted member 10043]

Army would set up the ALO and ROMAD tent for the opportunity to sleep in it with us. Marines never saw a tent before plus they had their own TACP. They were pretty good ground FACs. But I was able to rape a few no problem. I felt bad about that. I told the padre about it and he said it wasn't a sin because they were Marines and part of their POW training. The logic being AF were less likely to have STDs.

 

[ArmyJerry]

never heard of such tents

 

[sandwarrior]

My experience's have taught me that, yes there are some Marines that may be crayon eaters, along with most of the enlisted, and all of the commissioned officers in the Army, the difference is that all of the Army guys also eat that first grade paste.............you know that white creamy stuff.........which also leads them to eating white creamy stuff later in life...........get that Jerry

Hoka Hey

Sounds like you ate a jar or two.

 

[Deleted member 10043]

"Benteen, come on -- big village -- be quick -- bring packs. P.S. bring pacs."