Hello Hiders; A secret mission, should you choose to accept it.

[TheGerman]

I have to travel tonight. I don't want to for about 10000 reasons on top of the fact that, I just don't want to fucking go anywhere anyways. Private jet and mini giraffe aside, I know a lot of you are willingly/unwillingly going somewhere this weekend as well.

So with that, comes your mission. I began this years ago when I was traveling to Europe for a job and literally no one on the plane, the departing airport or the place I was going knew who I was or what I even looked like. I could literally be anyone, and that's when it hit me. Be someone totally different, because why not? The second I realized this the possibilities seemed endless; its literally how deep into the abyss can you delve without your shame ruining your fun.

Your mission this traveling weekend is to legit take on a whole different persona when dealing/talking to people you don't know and will probably never see again and sticking to it. Let it evolve. See what happens. Walk into the Admirals Club without a pass/card and how dare they ask who you are! Hell, from the last time I did this I'm still not sure if I was about to get arrested or have a 3 some.

My persona this weekend: I was Left Shark from the Superbowl halftime show.

 

[MilChad]

 

[...]

...I just don't talk to people I don't know in any significantly level of detail that an alter ego is necessary...

 

[uffduh]

I identified as thegerman last weekend. I’m sorry if the ever get you on that beastiality warrant that’s outstanding.

 

[theLBC]

I have to travel tonight. I don't want to for about 10000 reasons on top of the fact that, I just don't want to fucking go anywhere anyways. Private jet and mini giraffe aside, I know a lot of you are willingly/unwillingly going somewhere this weekend as well.

So with that, comes your mission. I began this years ago when I was traveling to Europe for a job and literally no one on the plane, the departing airport or the place I was going knew who I was or what I even looked like. I could literally be anyone, and that's when it hit me. Be someone totally different, because why not? The second I realized this the possibilities seemed endless; its literally how deep into the abyss can you delve without your shame ruining your fun.

Your mission this traveling weekend is to legit take on a whole different persona when dealing/talking to people you don't know and will probably never see again and sticking to it. Let it evolve. See what happens. Walk into the Admirals Club without a pass/card and how dare they ask who you are! Hell, from the last time I did this I'm still not sure if I was about to get arrested or have a 3 some.

My persona this weekend: I was Left Shark from the Superbowl halftime show.

i used to travel occasionally on business with a sales manager with a travel identity (film producer). he was mr. robinson on the road, always.
since he was a rich looking english gentleman, he managed to pull it off for the most part.

 

[Ric O'shay]

My best results when testing the waters on VIP and other restricted areas I wish to be in, is to say very little and act like you paid for the place.

 

[Bender]

You cracked my secret. In real life I have about four actual friends I talk to, I hate everybody else. But I am a sales rep for a good size company and I have to pretend to like a lot of our clients. It is literally a roll i play, the jovial sales guy who likes to take people golfing or fishing to close a deal. The truth is I hate golfing, and I hate pompous arrogant managers who think they have to be wined and dined for us to do Business. A few of my clients don’t want to be wined and dined and our normal people, we offer excellent products with excellent service. But there are some of these guys out here that want to be treated like rock stars, I literally had one set of guys at a company Ask me to buy them $7000 worth of night vision LOL. I laughed it off as a joke even though I know they were serious.

This tactic becomes especially useful when I was at the sheriffs department, use a loud booming cop voice and play the role of an aggressive asshole cop and sometimes the drunks listen to you. But I’m not that guy, I just figured out what role to play and use it to manipulate the person, either in jail, or on a new sales call.

I’ve met a very few women who are good at this in a positive way, as in they don’t use it to manipulate a romantic partner but a decent looking woman who knows how to play a role can sell ice to Eskimos.

In real life I like to hang out with my wife and kids and a couple of my friends in town. That’s it.

 

[Baron23]

This is me transitioned from a dumpy old guy into someone else...a dumpy old guy in a dress and earrings.

Ain’t I pretty. LOL

 

[Bender]

About 10 years ago when I was a construction superintendent, I was on the Air Force Base here in Cheyenne measuring rooms for new carpet, all I had was a hardhat, a clipboard a measuring tape and my ID on a lanyard around my neck. I could walk into an office and ask them to vacate so I could measure and move furniture. I literally did this in their armory where they had rows and rows of M-4 carbines. I would walk in, act like I owned the place and just ask people to leave so I could measure, none of them ever questioned me, they got up and walked out of the room. It dawned on me what if I was there under false pretense? What could I literally get away with just by acting with my command presence. I found it hilarious and scary at the same time LOL. I was asking uniformed officers to leave their office so I could do my work, But they never looked at my identification or ask any questions. LMAO

 

[armorpl8chikn]

Pffft!
I have 12.5 personalities.
I do this every




Who is this Chikn dude? And wtf is he doing on this gun forum?

 

[DocRDS]

I'm gonna pretend to be our fearless leader and see if anyone notices I am 2 feet too tall...

 

[sirhrmechanic]

I have to wait for my powdered wig to come back from the cleaners. It was a bit... ticky.

Plus they over-starched my puffy shirt. It chafes.

Sirhr

 

[sirhrmechanic]

About 10 years ago when I was a construction superintendent, I was on the Air Force Base here in Cheyenne measuring rooms for new carpet, all I had was a hardhat, a clipboard a measuring tape and my ID on a lanyard around my neck. I could walk into an office and ask them to vacate so I could measure and move furniture. I literally did this in their armory where they had rows and rows of M-4 carbines. I would walk in, act like I owned the place and just ask people to leave so I could measure, none of them ever questioned me, they got up and walked out of the room. It dawned on me what if I was there under false pretense? What could I literally get away with just by acting with my command presence. I found it hilarious and scary at the same time LOL. I was asking uniformed officers to leave their office so I could do my work, But they never looked at my identification or ask any questions. LMAO

That is a common exercise in various “craft” schools.

“Go here and get a hard-to-find piece of information.” Like an base roster or a weapons inventory. Or a training schedule. And don’t get caught.

Sirhr

 

[uffduh]

About 10 years ago when I was a construction superintendent, I was on the Air Force Base here in Cheyenne measuring rooms for new carpet, all I had was a hardhat, a clipboard a measuring tape and my ID on a lanyard around my neck. I could walk into an office and ask them to vacate so I could measure and move furniture. I literally did this in their armory where they had rows and rows of M-4 carbines. I would walk in, act like I owned the place and just ask people to leave so I could measure, none of them ever questioned me, they got up and walked out of the room. It dawned on me what if I was there under false pretense? What could I literally get away with just by acting with my command presence. I found it hilarious and scary at the same time LOL. I was asking uniformed officers to leave their office so I could do my work, But they never looked at my identification or ask any questions. LMAO

One day Bender walked into a pigeon coup, and the rest is history.....

 

[Aussie Joe]

My doctor says I have to take "special pills" to avoid going into any alter ego's or personas

 

[Slash0311]

5 of my 6 voices are telling me that my normal identity is too much "asshole." #6 voice suggested mixing in "rabid pitbull with roid rage" Not sure that's a good idea.

But I am going to the range in the morning so I've got that going for me.

 

[Davo308]

Try a thick Scottish accent.

 

[lariat]

Fuck it, just act like a dude that every hot chick with a birthmark on her ass wants to bed. See what happens. Report back. Bet we all get a good story out of it.

 

[atomic41]

Yeah I saw Wedding Crashers.

 

[Waco Kid]

Did that years ago. I used to work part time for a nascar affiliate, we were out of town at a race and some of the guys decided to hit up the local strip joint. By day I was a low paid grunt worker at the track, but at the tittie bar, I was an up and coming driver on the verge of landing a sweet sponsership deal! Actually, now that I think about it, I've never been to a strip club as myself

 

[BJames]

My former employer happens to be a large cargo/shitty package contract airline. As a crew member traveling anonymously from major city, or outlying smaller airport, to hotels in downtown areas of most of the nations major metro areas.... This was cheap entertainment at the nearest Applebee’s like bar. Have fun with it, had one dude convinced the second pilots job on every airline in the country is to stare at a stick coming out of the panel and make the wheels go up and down when told to do so

Another time, another city, had someone convinced I counted every single box that flowed through the large Amazon facility. Once, in MIA, I was a traveling prison guard. Some others, I never did any occupation that was really crazy, mostly boring shit just to fuck with their heads for my own entertainment

 

[isofahunter]

I want to know more about the mini giraffe.

 

[Aftermath]

I want to know more about the mini giraffe.

Sure you do, pervert.

 

[HeavyAssault]

Off to the public shooting range.....Going to Fudd it up REAL good...hope to bait in some Hide members. See ya there!!

 

[VA-Varminter]

My favorite travel game is to single out some young person with a name badge and pretend that they grew up in my neighborhood.
"Brittney?! Oh my God it's Britney! How are are you? It's been so many years! Look at you! You were just this tall when we moved away. Remember that dog we had?"

 

[VA-Varminter]

Then there was the Christmas that I was driving with my younger cousin and randomly chose a house with several cars parked indicating am obvious family gathering. Went in and pretended to be distant relatives who were just driving by and stopped in to say hello to everyone.

 

[FS1]

Only a poor has to pretend.

 

[GBMaryland]

This is me transitioned from a dumpy old guy into someone else...a dumpy old guy in a dress and earrings.

Ain’t I pretty. LOL

View attachment 7634873

You know... that really does look alot like you....








Bahaahahahahaaha... Nah, your boobs are bigger!!!

-kidding.

 

[Fig]

Did that years ago. I used to work part time for a nascar affiliate, we were out of town at a race and some of the guys decided to hit up the local strip joint. By day I was a low paid grunt worker at the track, but at the tittie bar, I was an up and coming driver on the verge of landing a sweet sponsership deal! Actually, now that I think about it, I've never been to a strip club as myself

Neither have the dancers. They’re all coke whores who become students working their way through med school when they’re in the club.

 

[GBMaryland]

Neither have the dancers. They’re all coke whores who become students working their way through med school when they’re in the club.

I once got dragged to a hole in the wall strip joint by an Army buddy of mine. (We'd both gotten out at this point...)

We go inside and half the women dancing are people I'm in Microbiology with... Awkward. (...but I had fun with it.)

 

[Baron23]

Bahaahahahahaaha... Nah, your boobs are bigger!!!

hahaha...says the guy whose belly announces him first as he rounds a corner! Bwhahahaha

 

[Snipe260]

So basically, don’t comply? Yea, I’m in!

 

[MCHOG]

About 10 years ago when I was a construction superintendent, I was on the Air Force Base here in Cheyenne measuring rooms for new carpet, all I had was a hardhat, a clipboard a measuring tape and my ID on a lanyard around my neck. I could walk into an office and ask them to vacate so I could measure and move furniture. I literally did this in their armory where they had rows and rows of M-4 carbines. I would walk in, act like I owned the place and just ask people to leave so I could measure, none of them ever questioned me, they got up and walked out of the room. It dawned on me what if I was there under false pretense? What could I literally get away with just by acting with my command presence. I found it hilarious and scary at the same time LOL. I was asking uniformed officers to leave their office so I could do my work, But they never looked at my identification or ask any questions. LMAO

I had the exact same experience as a locksmith. I could walk with a purpose through a business with a clipboard and wearing a polo with a key monogram on it without anyone batting an eye. Only very rarely did anyone verify that the owner or manager authorized whatever I was doing, even when I needed things from them. "Mam, I'm here to [change/work on/replace] the locks. I'll be over here. I'll need your keys." Even the ones that acted surprised just handed over the keys, often with their personal keys mixed in.

 

[Dead Eye Dick]

This is me transitioned from a dumpy old guy into someone else...a dumpy old guy in a dress and earrings.

Ain’t I pretty. LOL

View attachment 7634873

Pleeassssse...This is a family site. Please keep your phonographic and grotesque images to yourself.

 

[GBMaryland]

hahaha...says the guy whose belly announces him first as he rounds a corner! Bwhahahaha

You’re just jealous about your small frame!

 

[NFAJohn]

I had the exact same experience as a locksmith. I could walk with a purpose through a business with a clipboard and wearing a polo with a key monogram on it without anyone batting an eye. Only very rarely did anyone verify that the owner or manager authorized whatever I was doing, even when I needed things from them. "Mam, I'm here to [change/work on/replace] the locks. I'll be over here. I'll need your keys." Even the ones that acted surprised just handed over the keys, often with their personal keys mixed in.

Work for a pipeline company that's fairly well known....a traffic vest and hard hat will take you nearly anywhere if you look concerned enough.

 

[JJMoody]

Good lord! The opportunity for a guy with a bright green(orange, yellow etc) construction shirt, a (white) hard hat and a blinking light in any white pickup is endless! Pull up to any construction site right now with that MO and start loading sheets of plywood/ OSB. Look pissed, yell at anyone on site that “ Mike fucking called me to load this shit up and take it to the other job,so FUCK OFF!” Add drama and I bet guys on site would help you load it...

 

[Anointed1]

A little off topic but simular and funny. Years ago after the company I worked for started up a 3rd shift operation...only the most experienced and dependable people were allowed to man it because of no supervision. I went and after awhile and do to growth...they decided they needed a manager...about 40 people on the shift at that time in all types of different disciplines. They offered me the job so I took it. All these different people had different needs and quickly I needed access into areas that were locked up tight to support them.

The dayshift facilitator took me to the key shop one morning and introduced me as the new 3rd shift Factory Manager....told them I needed a key for accessing locked areas at night. I thought it was a little over the top the way they started interacting with me...you'd a thought the CO was standing in front of them. Sir this and Sir that...can we get you some coffee Sir...we could send someone to the cafeteria while you wait if you're hungry . Granted I was a pretty sharp dresser...expensive suit...sharp tie...Italian shoes.

Finally I get the key and signed a bunch of papers to receive it...didnt think much of that until they said...we'll get these over to the director of security right away and he may want to talk to you...if he does he'll probably just come to see you and shake your hand . Ok...somethings not right here...director of security coming to shake my hand ?

I was called into the office the following day on dayshift...my boss...a 2nd level manager...kinda pissed and very jealous because the key they gave me was a Great Grand Master key. Apparently Factory Manager was a title at Boeing...4 or 5 levels of management up the ladder lmao....this key literally opened any lock...any door in any building anywhere on company property in the Renton Division. I could have unlocked the gates and taxied a 70 million dollar jet right off company property haha.

My jealous boss who demanded the key because even his could only open a few doors...was shut down by security because the key was intrinsically assigned to me. I can't tell you what all that key did for me

.

 

[Bender]

I was transporting a cat 980 wheel loader about 20 miles to town by just roading it at 20mph. I got to some unrelated road construction where I was waiting in line with traffic at a orange cone temporary stop while they waited on the follow me car. The dude with the stop sign stepped out and waved me out of line and through the orange cones before the follow me car even was close. I got a free pass through because they thought I was loader for the asphalt crew. Lol, I drove though like I belonged and passed the follow me car headed in the opposite direction and after a couple miles I got out the other side past the paver and other stop sign guy, I waved at him on the way by and just kept going, he kinda stared at me as I went by like I was lost. I wonder if he thought I just stole a loader and kept driving. Lmaoooooo.

 

[Dirty D]

This shit is so boring, I pretend to be from this planet every day.

 

[Texasflyer]

This reminds me of why i didnt go to the military. When i went to san antonio to do the asfab and fitness stuff. I finished the test portion before anyone else in the room... took me like 15 mins i think. And im sitting in this big test room and nobody is looking at me. So i decide to go out for a cigarette. I make my way out the front of the building and im at the corner smoking a cig and a gentleman in very important looking green uniform pulls up, walks past me at 3 steps and then turns around and asked me where i came from and just what the hell i was doing. They acted like i snuck out instead of just walking like i was supposed to be there. Anyways they said i had to come back in 3 months if i wanted to join but life happened.