Maggie’s I'm an AssHole.....

[Nostradumbass]

At work, a couple of friends have been fighting....been getting on everyones nerves.

My one friend Hajjis brought some nuclear hot sauce called "the bomb," and while I was in the break shack I added it to his taco salsa.

Well apparently he's not the super hot sauce eater he says he is....he claimed he could eat pepper spray. But when he got ahold of this shit he went down quick! Started throwing up and pouring snot out his nose....

He's in medical right now...at least he thinks the other guy lit him up.
Just thought I'd share this.
Probally gonna get fired before it's over...

 

[High Binder]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Funny and well worth getting fired over.

 

[shankster..]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

At least you live up to your screen name. LOL.

Keep us updated.

 

[Nostradumbass]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Hajjis went home early, hadn't heard anything from him yet....the news when we left work this morning was that our CSI wannabe safety bitch is going to conduct an investigation.

Damn my luck....this was either the best prank, or the worst prank I've pulled....

 

[netranger6]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Lol. Where do you work? Well, what industry? If he is a true Haji, he should shrug it off to destiny and getting one step closer to his virgin after life.

 

[ssgp2]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Funny!

May as well go in style and spike the bitch's lunch...

 

[Nostradumbass]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Well, I work as a field machinist. A few years ago, Hajji got his name from his out of control hair and his huge bushy beard.....don't think he's really Arabic, just plenty throwed off....

 

[Maggot]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: shankster</div><div class="ubbcode-body">At least you live up to your screen name. LOL.

Keep us updated. </div></div>

 

[JCH]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

does anyone other than you know who really spiked the food?

 

[Nostradumbass]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Not yet....

 

[DMann]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

OPSEC and deny, deny, deny.

 

[rascaldog]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

They gotta catch you before they hang you.

 

[JCH]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Nostradumbass</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Not yet....</div></div>

Then keep your mouth shut and play dumb.

 

[onechance]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Does he know what was placed in his food, or does he know it was just hot?

 

[D Miller]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: DMann</div><div class="ubbcode-body">OPSEC and deny, deny, deny. </div></div>

+1

Keep your mouth shut.

 

[rwest309]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

deny everything, demand proof, make counter-accusations.

 

[PLeighton]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Has anyone seen you surfing this site?
If so you may wan't to edit your posts...

 

[High Binder]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: rwest</div><div class="ubbcode-body">deny everything, demand proof, make counter-accusations. </div></div>

Supply counter-intel. You saw Bob playing with a bottle of hot sauce and Mary said she was going to get Hijji back for that time he grabbed her ass.

 

[DAFAR]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Oh MAn that is some Funny shit, but people just dont have the sense of humr they used to

 

[jcfd2201]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Dr. Phil</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Has anyone seen you surfing this site?
If so you may wan't to edit your posts... </div></div>

True that!! Our IT guy can go back and pull all sorts of stuff out of our computers. Hopefully you aren't posting anything from work or while at work.

I use my personal laptop at work for this stuff and don't use our network.

Deny it all and don't buckle!

 

[nock]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Deny, deny, deny…I thought it was mine. Sorry, next time I will wright my name on my food.

 

[Austan]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

If they suspect you, do it to your own food an take your medicine. They wont suspect you anymore. When no longer suspected, get the bitches food too.

 

[Maggot]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

A good lie is a better than an incriminateing truth.

 

[79M1a-texas]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

It's never to early to start pointing fingers.

 

[1shot2kill]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

a buddy of mine did that to a owner operator of a helicopter the guy would fly like a ass to make everyone sick he though it was funny so some tabascoe sauce went into his can of dip he was red for the whole trip diddnt want to spit his 3 finger hot sauce chew onto the floor of a 300k helocopter

 

[Longguns]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

A Good Rule to live by is:
1. You Know Nothing
2. You See Nothing
3. You Hear Nothing

I have found you stay out of a lot of trouble with this advice.

 

[kbrady]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Your, and possibly another co-worker's, lunch needs some hot sauce to throw them off your trail. Sacrifices dude.....

Kelly

 

[RAF2]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

So Hajji brought the sauce in?

I suppose he was just trying to show off, now he is trying to blame someone else!

 

[dtask]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Kbrady</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Your, and possibly another co-worker's, lunch needs some hot sauce to throw them off your trail. Sacrifices dude.....

Kelly </div></div>

+1

Spike your own lunch, pull a slight show to acknowledge you've been hit and then shrug off your attack with a statement of something dismissive about how it's not that bad. Finish eating and make the puker look bitch.

 

[ubet]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Deny, deny, deny. Hopefully they dont have cameras where you spiked it at. Keep your mouth SHUT, and dont say anything to anyone. Wait a day or two and spike yours too, itll help your cause. That of if you want to go out in true style, spike the coffee maker and everything else you can.

 

[bondoscustomz1]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Fuck em' if they can't take a joke! Say nothing. Do your job and if they ask "he was running around bragging about his hot sauce that HE brought to work" Hell for all you know he did it to get out of work.

 

[Nostradumbass]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: ubet</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Deny, deny, deny. Hopefully they dont have cameras where you spiked it at. Keep your mouth SHUT, and dont say anything to anyone. Wait a day or two and spike yours too, itll help your cause. That of if you want to go out in true style, spike the coffee maker and everything else you can.</div></div>

Are you sure striking again on a mass scale is the best way to lay low.....just sayin

 

[slowkota]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

If you don't say shit... they don't know shit!!!

 

[Chiller]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

 

[shankster..]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Awesome post Chiller. Too funny.

 

[Guest]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Dr. Phil</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Has anyone seen you surfing this site?
If so you may want to edit your posts... </div></div>

Not to mention locking down your Photobucket account so that pic that shows your face doesn't seal the deal.

 

[shankster..]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Or his email address that links him to his Facebook account.

 

[dtask]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

What is this /b/?!

 

[shankster..]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: dtask</div><div class="ubbcode-body">What is this /b/?! </div></div>

No,we're trying to help him. Not send him 1,000 pizzas.

 

[Ol' RD]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

This is HR, would you mind coming up? No need to drag this out!! LOL! STFU! is the correct plan there bud! Next time you see your buddy ask him if he's ready for that Satan's blood hot sauce? you may want to duck after that though!

 

[TCA4570]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

A little of this will make you feel alive, after a all night bender!

http://blogs.westword.com/cafesociety/2010/10/mega_death_sauce_leads_to_mega.php

Coffee iced, or another beer.

Stick with plausible deniability.

Only hearsay with two.
Three, there is a witness.

 

[ElCoyote]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Bondoscustomz1</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Fuck em' if they can't take a joke! Say nothing. Do your job and if they ask "he was running around bragging about his hot sauce that HE brought to work" Hell for all you know he did it to get out of work. </div></div>
You do live in Texas where hot sauce is the norm

 

[ElCoyote]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

I have noticed that people that grew up anywhere north of OK can't tolerate much heat.Really need to bag the safety bitch next.

 

[rascaldog]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Tell em' not to worry it'll al come out in the end.

 

[50calibercruiser]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Nobody talks, everybody walks.

 

[CNOTES]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

Deny it,You know nothing,LOL

 

[ubet]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Nostradumbass</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: ubet</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Deny, deny, deny. Hopefully they dont have cameras where you spiked it at. Keep your mouth SHUT, and dont say anything to anyone. Wait a day or two and spike yours too, itll help your cause. That of if you want to go out in true style, spike the coffee maker and everything else you can.</div></div>

Are you sure striking again on a mass scale is the best way to lay low.....just sayin </div></div>

I was trying to say, either stay really low. Or fuck it and go out in epic fashion, one or the other not both.

 

[One-Eyed Jack]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

if the hot sauce ain't fit
and your buddy did shit,
they gotta acquit
if your lips they are zipt.

but if i were that friend
who vomited a huge mass
i'd seek out my revenge
and put the hot stuff up your ass.

 

[KYS]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: One-Eyed Jack</div><div class="ubbcode-body">if the hot sauce ain't fit
and your buddy did shit,
they gotta acquit
if your lips they are zipt.

but if i were that friend
who vomited a huge mass
<span style="color: #CC0000">i'd seek out my revenge
and put the hot stuff up your ass.</span> </div></div>

Well, your going prison rules now. Thats nasty.

 

[One-Eyed Jack]

Re: I'm an AssHole.....

hey guy from lex ky
in fact you made a point
although it weren't too kleer
i'll see you in the joint