The recoil difference between something like a .223 and a 6br/dash/gt is not as much as you would think, or feel in a 20lb gun with a brake. Whenever i shoot my .223 trainer i am surprised how much recoil there is , relative to match loads. its not like shooting a rimfire, which has no actual recoil to speak of.
It all comes down to your budget, how you want to reload, how you want to hunt components, ect. There is no one solution.
If you want to maximize barrel life and minimize es/sd, I would shoot for something like a 6BRA in 28" running mild loads around 2800. Recoil will be low, you almost cant make a bad load for it, and pressure will be low enough that you should get 3-4k per barrel. modern BR mags have solved the only real downside.