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Police, what is the funniest thing seen on patrol?

Re: Police, what is the funniest thing seen on patrol?

<---- waiting for the guy who says, "Having a hooker walk up to the window and looking between her legs and seeing a crank"

Come on gents, you know it was one of you, at least that's what my Boy told me from Brooklyn
wink.gif
 
Re: Police, what is the funniest thing seen on patrol?

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Jig Stick</div><div class="ubbcode-body">A guy sucking another guys cock </div></div>

That's funny?
 
Re: Police, what is the funniest thing seen on patrol?

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Jig Stick</div><div class="ubbcode-body">A guy sucking another guys cock </div></div>

Not a police officer or anything but...

We had to pull over in a rest stop for a random DOT inspection...

So I grabbed my gander mountain combo rod/reel, and bushwhacked to the shoreline...

Suprised the shit outta me, but dudes started jumpin up an dartin off in every which way you could imagine!!!
 
Re: Police, what is the funniest thing seen on patrol?

An officer searching a car after an arrest and finding what he believed to be a marijuana bong. He then proceeded to taunt the arrestee saying he found his bong and began to act like he was smoking out of it by putting it close to his mouth. It turned out to be a penis pump.
 
Re: Police, what is the funniest thing seen on patrol?

Many thi8ngs but one that comes to mind was watching a guy loking marble floor into cars. He passed up many expensive cars before he broke into POS. I grabbed him and asked why he broke into that car over the others. He said " I knew its was a goon un when I saw the stereo had a TVVVVV in it" What he thought was a TV was a voltage regulator gauge.


Then there was the look on the face of well dressed low life woman I made clean up her own shit after I caught her dumping on a very nice marble floor of a business. Actually my face when I ran into the scene and almost lost lunch. Her dress over her 300lbs head. Nasty!
 
Re: Police, what is the funniest thing seen on patrol?

Many thi8ngs but one that comes to mind was watching a guy loking marble floor into cars. He passed up many expensive cars before he broke into POS. I grabbed him and asked why he broke into that car over the others. He said " I knew its was a goon un when I saw the stereo had a TVVVVV in it" What he thought was a TV was a voltage regulator gauge.


Then there was the look on the face of well dressed low life woman I made clean up her own shit after I caught her dumping on a very nice marble floor of a business. Actually my face when I ran into the scene and almost lost lunch. Her dress over her 300lbs head. Nasty!
 
Re: Police, what is the funniest thing seen on patrol?

The following story is true....as me and my partner had the luck of experiencing it.

We got a call to check out a suspicious subject down by the river, near the dam. Well, actually it was to check out a suspicious woman. We get there and start making our way down the trail and almost to the river when we see a blonde wig floating in the water. We start to make our way towards it because we thought "she" may have drown. Just before we get to the shore the wig come out of the water and it's on a old man! What's worse is he has a two peice bikini on with a coffee can in his left hand and a bottle cheese wiz in his right hand.

We finally confronted him and he was supposedly video fish from a camera in the coffee can, using the cheese wiz to feed them. He was probably putting cheese wiz on his balls
smile.gif


That was the weirdest thing I've came across in my career so far.
 
Re: Police, what is the funniest thing seen on patrol?

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Insayn</div><div class="ubbcode-body">An officer searching a car after an arrest and finding what he believed to be a marijuana bong. He then proceeded to taunt the arrestee saying he found his bong and began to act like he was smoking out of it by putting it close to his mouth. It turned out to be a penis pump. </div></div>


That is funny.
 
Re: Police, what is the funniest thing seen on patrol?

I had 4 college girls washing their car naked at a car wash and someone complained. There were more cops there than solders at the Normandy invasion!!
 
Re: Police, what is the funniest thing seen on patrol?

I backed up my partner that had a rookie that month so we were split up. We were in the hood where they sell nothing but crack and hate 5-O. They stopped a man in his 50s from Oklahoma I think it was.

They knew he had just bought some rock because they set up on the dope house and saw him there. They got consent to search and the man eventually admitted he bought crack and showed us where he hid it.

While the rookie was doing the impound he found an ice chest in the back seat. when he opened it he found this big ass black dildo. The guy was staying in cheap motels where prostitutes turn their licks.

I had gloves on and showed it to him and he put his head down. I asked him if he got a permit for this dildo? He looked at me confused and said no. I told him any dildo over 1 foot long is illegal in the state of Texas and requires a permit. My partners at that time were dieing laughing. The guy said he would get the permit as long as he didn't get charged with it.

I told him he needed to be careful using that dildo on those prosties because of diseases. He looked at me like I was a dumbass and said its not for them it's for me. Needless to say he had gay porn in the truck too. I threw that thing like a javelyn bvk into the truck. I told him I was kidding about the permit and he laughed it off.
 
Re: Police, what is the funniest thing seen on patrol?

It wasn't patrol, but CVE (commercial vehicle enforcement). We were conducting Level 1 inspections on big rigs. After the stop noted there was a passenger for which the driver did not have authorization. The funny part? The passenger was sitting in an aluminum-frame lawn chair. Yeah, the type that folds and has plastic webbing! Needless to say, there was no seat belt either! There were a few citations issued.

Kevin