Fatherhood

TheBigCountry · Aug 11, 2021

As I type this, Im pushing well over 24 hours with no sleep and still going.

As of 2330 last night, I officially became a father. Then a little over 40 minutes later the second boy came into the world. The first weighed over 7lbs, and the second one is just shy of 6.5. Both are healthy as can be and eating/sleeping as they should.

Mom had a minor setback and is in rough shape, so I’ve been taking care of the boys for most of the night while the Hospital team try to get her stable. So far they have done a bang-up job, but I’m still worried/frustrated/unnerved to put it lightly.

Thereaper1313 · Aug 11, 2021

Congratulations. I became a father on father's day this year. I was awake for a good 48hrs before I could barely function anymore. Don't be afraid to let those nurses take your newborns to the nursery for a few hours of sleep.......the last thing you want is to be headed home tired.

HeavyAssault · Aug 11, 2021

Awesome to hear you got two!! Hope your lady continues to improve!! Stay strong, don't be afraid to ask for help.

Jerry V · Aug 11, 2021

Congrats and prayers sent!

DarnYankeeUSMC · Aug 11, 2021

Some friends were bringing their new baby into the world this past weekend. The woman and I took care of their 3 year old for a couple days. I enjoyed the hell out of it but I was glad to go home every night.

acudaowner · Aug 11, 2021

congrats now you gotta start planning collage costs , and that dreaded first car insurance costs and boyfriends or girlfriends did not see you post if it was a girl or a boy . either way your going to pay lol

Duc · Aug 11, 2021

This will be the biggest struggle of your life! There is NOTHING more rewarding than a child (or two).

Congrats and best wishes to the Wife.

TxWelder35 · Aug 11, 2021

The first 2 weeks were the hardest. Once you get your rythem down it gets easier.

Maggot · Aug 11, 2021

TxWelder35 said:
The first 2 weeks were the hardest. Once you get your rythem down it gets easier.

If he had gotte his rhythm down he wouldnt be in this predicament now.

Congrats

powdahound76 · Aug 11, 2021

Prayers for the Mrs getting past whatever is going on swiftly And of course you and the boys.

and congrats!! Deep breaths and let those nurses take em to the nursery and take care of them for a bit and get rest.

BufordTJustice · Aug 11, 2021

Congratulations! Hope all goes well with mom

BullGear · Aug 11, 2021

Congrats on having 2 healthy boys. Prayers for the wife and I hope everything goes well.

Being the father of 4 kids, I can tell you it's the most wonderful feeling in the world every time one comes into the world. If some doesn't believe in Love At First Sight, they've never had a baby.

Take things one day at a time. Live in the moment and although it's tough to do some times, try to remember you were Blessed by God when these boys were brought into the world. Even when they call you at 1am telling you they were in a slight accident and the tow truck driver wants to know which scrap yard he should take the car.

Naaman · Aug 11, 2021

Congrats!

I've got 4 boys myself, and maybe you can relate to this:
When my first one was born, I was acutely aware that I was holding a 7.3 lb future man in my arms. Teach them to be honorable above all things, and they'll make you proud!

Just don't assume that the same methods of parenting will yield the same results with each kid (unlike the military, one size does NOT fit all).

Please update the situation with your wife as your situation allows.

TheBigCountry · Aug 11, 2021

Managed to get a 30 minute nap in so far thanks to a nurse who watched both boys.

Wifes doing a lot better. They were able to catch the hemorrhage, and after another OR trip and a transfusion, she’s back with the boys and I in our temporary home for the next few days.

Thanks for all the well wishes and prayers. Im trying not to be a helicopter parent or stress over every little thing the boys do, but I can’t help myself from watching every move they make.

A&8's · Aug 11, 2021

Congrats.

Your 2 sons are 12hrs younger than my 3rd grandchild. My youngest son and his wife had their 2nd child yesterday at 1130 (CDT).

The D · Aug 11, 2021

TheBigCountry said:
Managed to get a 30 minute nap in so far thanks to a nurse who watched both boys.

Wifes doing a lot better. They were able to catch the hemorrhage, and after another OR trip and a transfusion, she’s back with the boys and I in our temporary home for the next few days.

Thanks for all the well wishes and prayers. Im trying not to be a helicopter parent or stress over every little thing the boys do, but I can’t help myself from watching every move they make.

Good to hear, congrats on your boys. You’ll helicopter for a while, that’s normal. You definitely have to make the conscious effort to not helicopter after a while. It’ll be nerve wracking at first(two of my sons have hemophilia, I get it) but you gotta let them explore. It’ll also become funny when they start bouncing off of things and laugh at themselves.

DukeGSP · Aug 11, 2021

Congrats to you both! i don't personally have any kids myself but i can only imagine the feeling it brings! prayers for a speedy recovery for the wife/mom. Just keep them alive, the world will do the rest.

Spartan67 · Aug 11, 2021

Congratulations on becoming a DAD! Best dam job in the world!
Fathers day is going to be so special for you now.
Dont worry about be a great Dad. Just love them unconditionally, and support them in everything they do!
You can never say I love you/proud of you , too many times!

And they grow up so damm fast!!!! Blazing speed! So start saving up for their Tacops now!

BuildingConceptsllc · Aug 11, 2021

Congrats. This is not going to be easy, but when they say "Daddy!!!! " and come run up and hug you, nothing else on earth matters.

Now for some truth BOMBS.

1. Your wife is going to be a little off for a while. No one tells you about this, but it happens to them all. Some more so than others, and the duration varies quite a bit from female to female, but they all do it. The hardest time in my many years of marriage, was the first 6 months of my oldest sons life, and we've been through a lot prior to that! She will return to her "semi sane" state, but it may be a while. Mine took almost a year with the first one, then it got shorter the next time. It will all settle down, just know that it's very normal, and we all go through it. You can do it too.

AngryKoala · Aug 11, 2021

Just remember to change the diapers before it runs down their legs.

Oldloser · Aug 12, 2021

Glad your wife is ok. My son is 13 now. He was a preemie but made it up in spades. Growth charts say he’s headed to 6’5”. Those boys will be mamas boys until they hit 12 then they will need lots of your time just doing stuff. We spent the weekend at the coast just son and I. Be sure to plan 1:1 times with each.

Snuby642 · Aug 12, 2021

Your wife will need decompression time every day it is important for her.
When she gets up and around and you get the boys on something of a schedule (is what it is) get her out of the house (not shopping) with a friend is good when you can.

Happy wife happy life.

Congratulations.

n0glock · Aug 12, 2021

Congratulations, the postpartum is a real thing, started about 3rd day with my wife, be patient it will pass, get your wife the biggest bouquet of flowers you can afford, and look into sleep training the little ones, some people hate it but I loved it, I still remember the first 2 weeks of my first worried about everything, and no sleep. it gets easier when you get a routine. Have fun it all goes by in the blink of an eye my oldest just turned 21.

ggmanning · Aug 12, 2021

Wow that's 2 big twins. Congrats to you and hope the wife recovers well.

TheBigCountry · Aug 14, 2021

Babies are home, mommas doing well, and now the real work begins. We had to stay an extra day at the hospital while we waited for some blood work to come back, which is all good.

Shameless pic of the two little guys.

AngryKoala · Aug 14, 2021

TheBigCountry said:
Babies are home, mommas doing well, and now the real work begins. We had to stay an extra day at the hospital while we waited for some blood work to come back, which is all good.

Shameless pic of the two little guys.

Enjoy it, it goes fast as hell.

Jefe's Dope · Aug 14, 2021

You won't be able to "fix" your wife if she gets the postpartum. All you can do is be supportive.

You won't believe how fast they grow up. One day you wake up and they've grown. My advice is to be present in the moment. Don't try to be super dad, just be a dad. And don't push them to interests above their pay grade(age). In fact, dial it back a bit and let them enjoy mastering stuff for their age rather than pushing them to get farther. If they're ahead of the curve, it will show itself and they will let you know they want more. Careful with the discipline. I advise you never discipline when you're angry and in the moment. Let it pass, think about if carefully and dole out the punishment. I was too quick to yell and now I carry that with me even though I don't think my kids resent me.

BuildingConceptsllc · Aug 14, 2021

They are beautiful babies!

"Be present in the moment" is absolutely great advice! My oldest is 5 already, and it's like it was just yesterday he was a tiny little baby. It really does go by so damn fast! What you say matters... what they see you do, day in and day out, matters a hell of a lot more.

Naaman · Aug 14, 2021

I've noticed that "it goes by fastER" when we're not paying attention. They will want more of your attention than you'll want to give at times. Be judicious about telling them "later" or "not now," etc. There are definitely times when telling them to wait is appropriate. I try not to "raincheck" them more than once at a time. Basically, I try to give more than what is merely convenient while being cautious not to spoil them.

You're going to see aspects of yourself in their behaviors and thought processes, which makes it easier to know what they need, and when, and how much of it.

Snuby642 · Aug 15, 2021

Good job dad.
A lifetime of first's await you. Most will be good.

Remember wife will need extra help and loving.

Small kids can run you ragged for a while but it passes and the fun begins.

Tokay444 · Aug 15, 2021

Momma bear is in my thoughts.

GTOJOSH · Aug 15, 2021

Some wisdom I got after my first of 5 children:
Your sleeping days are done.
By the time all your kids sleep through, and don't keep you up at night, you'll be so old you'll have to wake up to pee anyway.
Although it's mostly true, Congrats, and sending all the best to you and your family. "Dad" "Dadda" "Poppy" "Pappa", whatever they call you is the greatest title of nobility if you let it be.

M8541Reaper · Aug 15, 2021

At 5 they start to become cool and you’ll begin to see a good idea of how you’re imprinting (for better or worse). Then again, at three he was walking around with a little level and cabinet pull template while I was remodeling the house

Glad to hear your wife is better and all is well. Congrats man.

Also….
Whoever the fuck got the contract to supply those white blankets with the stripes to every hospital in the US (fed and civ) has to have more money than Bezos.

deersniper · Aug 15, 2021

Congratulations! Glad to hear the wife is better.

the first couple weeks/months are rough but it does get better.

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