Not meaning to pick a fight, but I don't understand what it is in this graph that pisses you off. I'm not a millionaire, but having followed the advice of a financial advisor, we're up ~23.3% What "BS numbers"? We were "unlucky" to be converted to 80% cash and bonds after we recovered to mid-February levels--so we missed Wall Street's general trend of ignoring bad news (and continuing to trend upwards despite bad industrial/production/profit/unemployment numbers) in the middle of this year. We just stepped back into a stronger stock position this week. We, too, aren't holding the same equities we held in mid-February, but that's the nature of the game.
The market low was hit on March 23. I don't understand why you think using the general dates in the graph is a bad gauge.
If one "plays" in the market as if it was a casino, buying and selling "short-term" ploys in an attempt to 'buy low, sell high', then the attempt to time the market will usually kill the player. However, even the small guy can capitalize on the general market movements with decent long-term investments IF s/he has the nerve to stay invested and not panic (sell) during the steep declines ("corrections"). Here's the latest of what are countless essays on the subject of "staying the course" (provided one's investments are sound):
Why staying invested pays off