Maggie’s My attempt at parenting and political correctness

[TOP PREDATOR]

seems my daughter is having a problem at school with another girl peeling off the pictures on the expensive disney packpack i bought her, along with stealing things out of the pockets.

my kid is pretty big compared to the others in her class (1st grade, 6yrs. old) so i didn't want to teach her to use that to her advantage...yet.

so after telling the teacher and bus driver several times of the problem, and getting no results, she had grabbed the other kid's pack and searched through it to find her stuff. of course, she got blamed for going through the other kid's pack, and a warning came home today that she will be kicked off the bus if my daughter does it again.

so in my attempt of being a good "today's parent" and going along with the rules of a politically correct system, i have made up this note for my kid to carry.....

HOPEFULLY THE OTHER KID WILL NOT END UP WITH SORE RIBS!

 

[Queequeg]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

Good luck with that Mr. Predator.

It is crap like that which made the selection of Catholic schools for our daughters an easy, though financially challenging, choice.

The public schools are run by cowardly buck passers and largely employ decent but not particularly imaginative people. Mantras, platitudes, bromides, soothing nonsense, whatever you choose to call it, the main purpose of doing nothing meaningful in the case of your daughter's loss of her stickers is because they are truly baffled and likely indifferent. This problem forces them to act and they did not choose their careers because they wanted to be decisive. They are so steeped in horseshit that they are paralyzed by it.

I think you are on the right track but you should refrain from mentioning "political correctness". I'd go for the "Bullying" angle. It's a buzzword very popular among the "Phone-it in" class of hack that populate the schools, and many other municipal, county, state and federal agencies that poorly do what the private sector does far more efficiently.

With the spate of violence recently blamed on bullying (Yes it's likely bullshit but that is the means of exchange today, our chief export product!), the lawsuit industry is eager to exploit the very same lack of action on the part of the bus driver and school district to enhance the profits for their growing market sector!

Sure, you might only get a settlement of $80,000, split 60-40 between you and the shyster, but his backbreaking work of three phone calls and a letter might solve your problem.

I'd bring that up with principal Skinner when they object to the tone of your letter.

Good luck and sorry about your little girl having to find out about the nature of planet zoo at such a tender age.

 

[The Mechanic]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

You need to go to the principle or the vice principle. She needs some witnesses to what is happening even if she just needs to find a Friend that will back up whatever she says. Make sure she never threatens the kid in front of any other student. Bathrooms are good for discussions. Make sure she never hits the other girl in any spot that will leave a mark, best spots are ribs, chest and slaps on the top of the head. Make sure you tell the Principal that she has been taught to never start a fight. Make up a good story that will make it sound like some incident in her past makes her a victim. Yah I know it sounds bad but these are formative years that girls need Friends or they will tend to end up with the wrong crowd and that can last forever. When you kid is popular she will tend to lead rather than follow.

 

[High Binder]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

Kill the other kids parents. Your daughter then could simply turn to the thief and say "my dad killed your whole family and kicked your dog" which I think would be much more effective than your letter.

Really though I do like your letter idea and for no other reason than it forces teachers and bus drivers to acknowledge their own stupidity and failure to act.

 

[Guardog36]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

Books to the gut work very well also.

 

[cavscout1983]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

I can't believe you guys are giving advice on how to beat up a little girl. lol.

Sounds like a good plan, Top Predator. I'm going to pass it along to my dad who is a middle school teacher. He'll get a kick out of it as well as share in your frustration with the school disciplinary system.

 

[Bolt_Overide]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

get her a copy of the chicago yellow pages A-L, put it in the book bag. Take it to a tailor and have the stitching on the straps reinforced, teach her to use it like a flail.

Problem solved.

 

[Redmanss]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

Good on you TP. Hopefully the administration takes it seriously now. Does Eagle or Eberlestock make a bag in pink? If not, they should. Try and destroy that one punk!

My own interaction with my childrens' schools are mixed. I have a 6yo girl in a private school and a 9yo boy in government school (special needs assistance not available in private school). Interaction with the private school has been nothing but pleasure, but with the gov't school it is pure hell.

My boy got suspended last year for tapping the brain dead teacher too hard when she wouldn't acknowledge him asking her to go to the bathroom. She said he hit her. The other kids said otherwise, but we all know how that one goes. My wife got a warning notice from the school security manager that she is too aggressive to the principal and staff there, and they felt intimidated. It has been one headache after another, can't get our son transferred, and we're about to the point of moving just to get away from these PC and paperwork happy idiots.

Private school for us is expensive at $800/mo, but I'd gladly pay double that if I could get my boy into one too. If you can afford it, get it. Then you truly are the boss, the hand that feeds, and the customer is always right. Not to mention the much higher quality of education offered, at least in our experience it is.

Here's something else we did. You also might want to ask the school, in a documented registered letter, why they are failing to provide a safe environment for your girl. The next one goes to the school board if they don't follow through. Document, document, document is the lesson we learned. That is the only way to make them act and not just pay lip service to you, but obviously you know that with starting your own letter. Good luck.

 

[Sean the Nailer]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

Lotta good advice here. Some humorous, and some VERY pertinent.

In the past when dealing with a principal, I'd explained that if nothing were to change after my bringing the situation to her attention, then I'd be dealing with the parents of the instigators.

From then on, the instigators would learn by either "trickle-down effect" or "osmosis", one or the other.

The problems got dealt with right quick, thankfully. But I gotta say, you guys suggesting "strategy" and the typical Bugs Bunny "Parry-Guard-Thrust" moves has me chuckling.

Good luck with this Top, you're going the proper route. As sorry as that may be.

 

[TOP PREDATOR]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Shot In The Dark</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Kill the other kids parents. Your daughter then could simply turn to the thief and say "my dad killed your whole family and kicked your dog" </div></div>

i'd never kick an innocent dog

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: guardog36</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Books to the gut work very well also.</div></div>
i was thinking an elbow strike to the 6:00 as it would look more natural while holding the backpack.

wanted to do the private / catholic school thing, but the wife got us into some financial stress a few years back and can't flip the tuition.

got a response from the bus driver today, the wife said that she (the bus driver) said she had no idea this was going on, although we have talked to her before. i like the "bullying" angle, will have to use that more often. only problem is my kid is a bit larger than the others, and if wasn't so afraid to smack someone, would squash the other kids like a bug.

the principle got a look at the note via the teacher, can't wait to see what becomes of that.

but going to try the diplomacy thing first, then the lesson by force.

just wanted to get an opinion if i was too over the top with the wording of the letter. don't want to come off like too much of a pshyco.....

 

[35WLN]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

Be careful what you tell your kids. My son was getting bruises from a school bully. I told him that when it happened to tell the teacher and they would take care of it. Well, the bruises continued and I asked what did the teacher do. "nothing" says my boy. So I set up an appointment with the teacher and her explaination was they were just being boys and playing too rough. I explained that my son coming home with bruises all over his body was too extreme and if it didn't stop I was going to teach my son how to defend himself and stop the threat. THe teacher kind of dismissed it.
Two weeks later I get a phone call from the principal saying I needed to come in and have a meeting about my son and the fight he was in at school that day. So the principal, my son and I sat down and the principal asked my son to tell me what happened. My son explains that a kid pushed him and as he was going to tell the teacher again the kid punched him in the back. My son then says he turned, kicked him in the balls and kneed him in the face and then went to the teacher. I looked at the principal and asked what the problem was. With a surprised look on her face she said that it was totally unacceptable and had to be dealt with. I told her that we tried "dealing" with it through the teachers but got no resolve and was forced to defend himself till the threat stopped and I stood by my son's actions. Long story short my son was suspended for 2 days as was the other kid. He has also never had to defend himself at school again though he has gotten into a couple after school.

 

[MikeeBooshay]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

yup. force still works.

My son was having issues with a bully in the first grade. Private school, his mother TAUGHT there. Kid would come up every recess and knock mine down in the sandbox.

Tried handling it with the teachers on "playground watch". Nope - too busy gabbing and drinking coffee, like it was break time not work time.

Addressed it with principal, no change.

Sparred with son every night " hit my hand as hard as you can...." Sent him to school to " make your fist and hit him as hard as you can in the face" when he does it again.

Got joint call from principal and mom next morning - "what did you tell him? He won't talk and said we were supposed to call you????"

Short story - my kid wasn't suspended, but I was not very welcome at the Fall Festival. And their was no more trouble from ths kid or any other. Kids figure out, just like bannana republic despots, some things and people are not to be pushed around. Some.. learn the harder way.

Unfortunately, any more than first grade, there would have been a lot more trouble, most for sure in public school. Total lack of common sense. If you can swing the private school tutition do so. Better education and better morals for the most part.

Parents still have to do their part, seems like you are on the right track.

 

[lanwickum]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

Had a kid bullying my cousin or little brother or something. Waaaay back when I was in grade school. I told my dad about it and he basicly said to teach the bully a leason. I did, not much, but he started crying. I ended up telling the principal what my dad said after I was in her office in trouble. She asked if I would jump off a roof if she told me to. I told her I wouldn't listen to her. True story. I still don't like her or her kids.

 

[Mike Casselton]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

My 16 yr old daughter got into a fight with a boy when she was in 8th grade. The kid kept turning the hall light on and off. She politely asked him numerous times to stop and warned that she would notify the band teacher. He kept doing it so she walked over to him and put her hand over the light switch. As soon as she covered the switch, the little shitbag shoved her and then took a swing at her. She immediately went on the offense with him. She punched him in the mouth and stomach. When he hit the floor she jumped on top of him and gave him a few more whacks.
I got called and did the dad thing. When I asked if I could speak with the boys father, they refused my request. I figured the father was a wife beater, so I checked into it and sure enough he has a domestic violence record. Wonder where the kid got his idea of it being OK to hit a girl???

Anyway, two years later, the kid still moves to the other side of the hall when they pass

On the other note, if your daughter's backpack weighs as much as my 12yr olds pack weighs, just simply have her accidentally drop it on the other kid... That should take her out for a while

 

[bighungryguy]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

In my experience, nothing is as effective as going to the kid's house, knocking on the door and having a talk with the parents. Most of the time they will hang up on you if you call, but when you go into their world, they have to listen. Drive the bus route with your kid and have her point out the house, then go knock on the door at dinnertime. Has worked every time for me.

 

[younggun22]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

You should always try to handle the situation politely, doesnt matter if your 6 or 60. But Some people only understand a good crack in the mouth.

 

[TOP PREDATOR]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

just to wrap it up, the principle of the school has assured that she will take care of it if she is told about the any new incidents, the bus driver is more cooperative, and all the stuff that got removed out of the kids backpack suddenly reappeared.

why she even got her seat on the bus moved further away than the other girl

i guess it still rings true - "speak softly and carry a big stick" - nothing like the classics

thanks for the support.

 

[Trapshooter12]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Shot In The Dark</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Kill the other kids parents. Your daughter then could simply turn to the thief and say "my dad killed your whole family and kicked your dog" which I think would be much more effective than your letter.

Really though I do like your letter idea and for no other reason than it forces teachers and bus drivers to acknowledge their own stupidity and failure to act. </div></div>

Good thing I wasn't drinking anything I might have choked on it.

I see nothing wrong in todays world with defending yourself. It would solve many problems in todays world.

But, I'm from the Old School anyways. I remember in the 60's when I changed schools the first day I always got into a fight. The kids had to check out the new kid to see if they could bully him.

My Dad always told me never to start a fight and if I did I better win because if I didn't he was going to kick my ass afterwords also. I still live by those words today at 50 years old.

If your going to start something with me I will back down until you put your hands on me (you get the first one) but if you comeback for a second one then the fight is on. I have a reputation for not putting up with to much shit. To me this is how IronWorkers are and how the world should be. One tends to have more respect for others knowing that they could get their ass kicked.

Anyways good luck the things kids have to go through today is BS.

 

[chris223]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

My daughter was having an issue on the bus as well
and after the wife tried a page out of the every child is a winner book I took one from the great santini
either you take him to the floor or you dont come home
well its amazing the only thing she said was what if I get in trouble with the teachers I told her dont say a word
except to have them call me
the call never came and she dealt with the issue
I told the rest of the family let the pussies of the world raise children im raising warriors who will stand on there own two feet when im dead and gone....

 

[Emilio]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

I had a guy bully me in the 3rd grade. I have always been big for my age but this guy was held back twice. When my dad found out about it he said,"Either you kick his ass or I kick yours" I was motivated then. i put a Coke can in a sock and went to town. Never got messed with, didn't even go to the office for that one. the bully was pulled out of the school because "he" was afraid now.

 

[cavscout1983]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

Emilio- a bold move, and fortune apparently favored you.

 

[PhOnEpHrEaK]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

I was always taught not to start a fight, but if somebody else started one finish it.

I was in 10th grade some all state wrestler just kept pushing me around, I ignored it for awhile but one day at football practice I shoved him back, he took a swing at me, turns out he didn't know much outside of wrestling. Too bad for him I was taught to fight by a Marine Corps combat instructor.

Lets just say it ended quickly with him getting choked out, I let him up before he passed out. He got up, went running over to the football coach crying saying I hit him, luckily for me half the football team was there to say I was defending myself, didn't see him on the field again after that day and he never started anything with me again.

 

[Yeticowboy]

Re: My attempt at parenting and political correctness

What's actually screwed up in today's society is that it is taboo to defend yourself. I told my son don't ever start a fight, but also that nobody has a right to lay hands on you and do you harm. I told him not to worry about getting in trouble if he felt he was in any kind of danger to do whatever he needed to, I'll deal with the aftermath. Luckily for him when your dad is known as the 6'6" 300 lb. guy with a mean streak most parents are real cooperative. Your kids will learn from example by you. I just hope my example teaches him to stand up for himself and not grow up to be a jerk.