Neighbor’s unofficial sign

[tsavo303]

Clever minds of snipers hide, I can use your creativity,
A neighbor( I haven’t met) decided to claim the parking spot in front of his townhouse despite it being public. Parking is not an issue. We all have 2 car garages and the curbside public spots aren’t half used. So he had this sign made. Which he has no authority to do. So I undid the 2 wing nuts and threw it in my truck
So he paid to have another one made, and this time used security bolts. So I angled grinded it some. Please suggest anything funny we can do to mock this
hoa isn’t doing anything
lol he concreted it in seriously. Painted the asphalt twice, “reserved”
thinking about adding other signs to the post.
I should probably do the grown up thing and just pull the post out and recycle it, but that’s not as funny
I was thinking repainting it “ micropenis parking only”

 

[MO Fugga]

$5 Blowjobs Inside. 60% Minority Discount.

 

[TicTacTex]

Or just quit being a Karen and let other people waste their time on petty issues.

 

[LuvDog]

Definitely small penis parking.

 

[zeroz]

I'd just ignore the sign and park there if i need to, tell guests to do the same. The other thing Id do is move out of a fucking townhouse. If you really want something I can make you some vinyl stickers to put over the white square.

 

[Alphatreedog]

Get a handi capped placard then paint the spot and ad signage .

 

[lightman]

The first thing that crossed my mind was to be careful stealing his sign! It seems like there are cameras everywhere now days. Just saying..............

But other ideas are to replace the sign with another sign. Maybe tack weld the nuts onto the bolts! $20 blowjobs at this address! Asshole parking only! Free parking! Small penis parking only!

Buy a wrecked car and park it in front of his sign jacked up on blocks.

Or just pull up the sign post. A high lift jack works well for this. (don't ask)!

Or just let it go. Maybe said asshole will move off.

Just don't let this get you in trouble!

 

[918v]

Is the sign on his property?

 

[tsavo303]

sign is on public land . I just think it’s funny mocking the fake authority.

 

[roostercogburn98]

 

[Milf Dots]

sign is on public land . I just think it’s funny mocking the fake authority.

Keep up the good work- never stop fucking with that "Karen".

 

[Pharmseller]

Cut the post

 

[ZY100]

When you do put your sign up….be sure to round the corners on the nuts/bolts and use some good red threadlock. Snug them up with some vice grips.

Of you could just take his sign down again and fill the top half of the bolt holes with similarly prepped nuts/bolts. Let him pull the post out.

Yes, I am that juvenile at times…

ZY

 

[Makinchips208]

run it over.
Repeat as neccessary

Or take a big pipe wrench and twist the post 180 so the sign is facing the wrong way.

 

[NoDopes]

HOA has no authority here...

Police... They'll say "iT's A cIvIl mAtTeR."... Until it affects someone on their side... Then, it's throw the book at them and a few extra chumped up charges for good measure, plus resisting arrest.

Oh shit, didn't mean to derail the thread. Carry on.

 

[tsavo303]

lol I wouldn’t call the cops (Or hoa for that matter)Just funny to mess with the idiot that thinks he can be bossy Hoa has the authority to control what’s on public or enforce the neighborhood rules

 

[Jgunner]

They/them parking only

Trump voter parking only (only works if democrat)

Post op tranny parking only

Refugees welcome (unit number) 24/7

 

[NoDopes]

In Texas, HOA has no authority for street parking at all or anything public. They only oversee homes and private yards. City ordinance covers it.

 

[Slash0311]

My .02..

Even tho the "illegal" sign is on public property, it's still theft.

However, I definitely agree with your thinking. Moving it to the furthest spot from it. FJB sticker. Cover it in a plastic bag and tip-tie closed. THEN cover the bag in racoon urine.

 

[Makinchips208]

THEN cover the bag in racoon urine.

Ok. Explain the process.

 

[Slash0311]

Stinks to high heaven. The best case would be used just enough that the person removing the bag doesn't realize its on there and gets it on their hands.

 

[NoDopes]

 

[Herb Stoner]

Just call a tow truck. “See driver, there’s the sign. A clear violation - please tow the offending vehicle.”

Or…

 

[Jefe's Dope]

Is the parking on HOA/home owners private property but public parking or is it city/county property street parking for the public?

 

[tsavo303]

Sign is on hoa property . parking is unrestricted

 

[Arc Light]

Just imho, but if you have plenty of parking and it really doesn't effect you, why lose any sleep over it? The HOA apparently doesn't consider it a big deal either. With all the unstable nut jobs around today, I try to avoid confrontation unless it's necessary. Especially if I have to live next to that person.

 

[tsavo303]

Maybe cover it with epoxy and carpet sample

 

[Doc68]

OP, you live in an HOA......dumbass....


Doc

 

[WaltHer]

Don't know about taking his sign bit a few of these fine stickers on his car might send the message. The good ones never peel off clean. Gotta use a razor blade and Goof-Off.

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[lonegunman762x51]

Do your neighbor a favor and let the city or county know he is threatening people who part on a public street. Why fight with him when you can get the county to fuck with him for free? Call the non-emergency number instead of 911 to let them know when he threatens you. Include the mention of his gun and tendency for violence.

 

[Rocketvapor]

Karen Vs Karen ?

Reminds me of the Mad Magazine
Spy Vs Spy

 

[jbuck88]

I don't think damaging it would be my first move. However stickers that fit in the desired area would be. "Gay Clowns" "My wife's boyfriend" "Man Karen's only" etc. Just keep a bunch ready to go and slap a new one on as needed

 

[Rocketvapor]

will be watching the news to see how this goes.
Suggesting contacting the police, maybe getting him swatted, stickers on cars, derogatory signs, all sound like someone is wearing the wrong size drawers.

Which of the two spots in front of his place did he put the sign?


OH WAIT, I forgot, this is the Bear Pit.
Go ahead on.

 

[Huskydriver]

Ok. Explain the process.

 

[Snipe260]

Walk over. Beat fuck out of him with said sign. Prob solved

 

[Huskydriver]

Walk over. Beat fuck out of him with said sign. Prob solved

 

[Rocketvapor]

This is too good to let die out.
Keep the Ideas coming

Maybe Copy this thread and mail it to the neighbor along with a couple spare signs to ramp this UP some.

 

[sirhrmechanic]

Clever minds of snipers hide, I can use your creativity,
A neighbor( I haven’t met) decided to claim the parking spot in front of his townhouse despite it being public. Parking is not an issue. We all have 2 car garages and the curbside public spots aren’t half used. So he had this sign made. Which he has no authority to do. So I undid the 2 wing nuts and threw it in my truck
So he paid to have another one made, and this time used security bolts. So I angled grinded it some. Please suggest anything funny we can do to mock this
hoa isn’t doing anything
lol he concreted it in seriously. Painted the asphalt twice, “reserved”
thinking about adding other signs to the post.
I should probably do the grown up thing and just pull the post out and recycle it, but that’s not as funny
I was thinking repainting it “ micropenis parking only”
View attachment 8406560

Burn his fucking house down.

Then he’ll have plenty of room for parking.

Also calthrops under his tires every time he parks.

Sirhr

 

[Long Range 338]

Just park in his his claimed spot every single day…

 

[Rocketvapor]

He does already

 

[Ronws]

Do your neighbor a favor and let the city or county know he is threatening people who part on a public street. Why fight with him when you can get the county to fuck with him for free? Call the non-emergency number instead of 911 to let them know when he threatens you. Include the mention of his gun and tendency for violence.

Here is one problem with that. If the OP claims he has been threatened, then the police can do something about it but also name him. Everyone has the right to confront their accusers.

Then, it will be game on. Up until now, he may not know who the OP is.

HOA does not want to do anything but I don't see where is the precedent that one tenant can "reserve" an open parking space that is not marked for his unit. If the property is private, there is still semi-public access. So, One could spend a lot of time researching that.

Or not. The problem is in dealing with private property. This sign might be considered private property. What are the HOA rules about private property in a commons area?

 

[sirhrmechanic]

Didn’t end well when my neighbor tried this…

 

[sirhrmechanic]

Call his wife and say “if your husband fucks my daughter again I’m coming over and it won’t end well.”

Use burner phone from bodega.

He’ll be too busy getting divorced to worry about parking.

Sirhr

 

[Mike Casselton]

I say put a dead fish in his air vent

 

[Rocketvapor]

Mailed screen shots to neighbor, goes out Monday.
This will NOT END

 

[stemikel]

The boot is an awesome idea

 

[Jscb1b]

Put your own sign up in front of his place.

 

[Clob McStrunk]

What kind of car does he drive/park there?

 

[dustingaunder]

Punch him in the face.

 

[Inifinty]

Replace with this sign and tie a billy goat to the post for a day.

All the shrubberies will be gone by sunset.