Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

#51
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

So I understand I will paraphrase.

You have no job, beacuse you went to get a job that has a near zero demand in your area. You want your wife to give up a job that can support a family so you can travel to another area to make less than what she earns. You also have made comments about child care costs.

I am unaware of her work schedule but lets say she works 8-4. Work 4PM to 8AM.

GET A JOB DUDE. A paramedic in my area typically makes 22,000 base working for a private company. Why anyone goes to school for that is amazing. Before making decisions, THINK.

You:I want to be a paramedic.

Me:Why?

You:Its my dream job.

Me:There is zero oppurtunity in this area for that and pay is shit.

You:But its my dream job.

ME:DREAM BIGGER

It may be a dream job but I think you undervalue yourself. I would like to know what you did in the navy that does not translate to private sector. Please let me know and I bet I could work it into your resume.

For the time being, depending on kids age (hopefully school age.) I imagine that your kids should be older than 2.5 years because if you were making babies while outta work I do not think any of these opinions will help. Get a job as a janitor. scrub shitters, thats a military thing you can bring to the private sector. Lastly, you are not above scrubbing shitters or pouring sawdust on vomit. No one is when it comes to feeding your kids.

PS Pull yourself up by boot straps
 
#52
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

Take a lesson from the Asians in Seattle.....
At the electronics firm I work, 90% are either related to each other or a friend brought them in.
My coworker, married now with 3 kids is on the take for public supported child care plus he receives food stamps. Therefore he works, his wife on paid maternity leave and the money still comes in. When both man and wife work, it's still over $16/hr. each and child care and food stamps continue on.....another reason for affording those $9.95 bottles of specialty beer.
Small town, small opportunities. Large town, more opportunities plus a temporary services agencies can get you working quickly {they are not paid unless you do work}..this is a good choice, prospective employers can take a look at you and decide to hire or not after the bounty fee paid. (my experience 21 years ago) The relative or friend in position still holds true.......even a animal control officer had over 100 applicants and qualifications made it so easy, high school graduate, driver's license etc....so many in the top 10, "my nephew is on the list, we'll hire him."
Then the matter of changing professions.....at my company we have a new civil engineer graduate and anthropologist doing common electronic assembly work that uneducated Asians do every day. College is no guarantee for job success anymore.
 
#53
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

If you are near a Coast Guard station, check them out. I'd bet thy would be happy to have a man with your skill Set. From what I've seen and heard it looks like the Coasties are pretty high speed these days.
 
#54
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

perhaps like one mentioned before -
try one of the specialty companies that need your services or some military training installations that recently incorporated sere training to pilots / soldiers etc. i knew a buddy who did that in the central TX area.

good luck!
 
#55
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

This comes from an Old Fart, worth nothing at all.
I raised 3 children doing all kinds of jobs and NEVER took a food stamp nor unemployment.
I did all kinds of things to feed my family, to include shitty jobs and things I knew were beneath my employment skills.
I never got welfare nor free food, I just found a job and worked at that until I found something better.
My family ate things that came from the barrel of a rifle or my trapping skills, but we always had food on the table. Maybe not the most palatable things or legal as far as Game and Fish Dept. went, but none the less, food on the table.
You haven't worked for 2 1/2 years? and your Old Lady is still with you?
You are one lucky SOB.
If I were her, She would have kicked you to the curb about 2years and 5 months ago.
Have you no pride?
Get a fuckin job and relieve this Lady of holding the handles of keeping a family together.
ANY JOB that pays ANYTHING.
Sit on your nuts and wonder what is wrong?
My name is Jody and I am here to see your wife,
Get the picture?
Regards, FM





































game and Fish laws went
 
#56
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

I 100% completely disagree with Shankster.

Men work and support women, so it can go the other way.

I went through a lay-off and went back to school, got unlucky and got this job but despite the schedule pays well...

BUT - there are things you can do on the side - whether it's selling amway or buying/selling on craigslist etc....

Patience..
 
#57
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: shankster</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Is your wife being unreasonable? You haven't worked in 2 1/2 years when you have a wife and kids so you could get your paramedics license?

WTF? Your first priority is to provide for your family then chase your dream job. Shovel shit if you have to at nights and go to school to be a paramedic. Imagine how she feels. She has been working a job with the stress of knowing if anything happens to her or her job, her kids and her future are screwed.

I worked my way through school pulling a full load and working full time. How could you not work with a family of three for that long?

Get off the computer, quit feeling like you're the victim here and get your ass a job. <span style="text-decoration: underline">Any job</span> and apply to be a paramedic.

Your lucky she isn't the one starting this thread not you.


(BTW, I'm shocked a defending a woman.)</div></div>
Could not have said it better myself.
 
#58
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: ArcticLight</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><span style="font-weight: bold">I 100% completely disagree with Shankster.</span>

<span style="font-weight: bold">Men work and support women, so it can go the other way.</span>

I went through a lay-off and went back to school, got unlucky and got this job but despite the schedule pays well...

BUT - there are things you can do on the side - whether it's selling amway or buying/selling on craigslist etc....

Patience.. </div></div>


<span style="font-weight: bold">You failed to add <span style="text-decoration: underline">2 children</span> into the equation and <span style="text-decoration: underline">not working for 2.5 years</span>.</span>

<span style="font-weight: bold">Totally inexplicable to me. </span>

<span style="font-weight: bold">To each his own.</span>
 
#59
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

Okay so it sounds like you would still have the full use of your GI bill available. Which, would be 100%. If you're having that rough of a time finding a job, go enroll in some sort of college program to either increase your marketability as a paramedic, or add another area of expertise so you don't have to look in just one career field. Then, a lot of colleges offer students on-campus jobs that pay considerably better than minimum wage (like $13.50 or more). You could be taking night classes and working at the college on days your wife is home with the kids. That could end up bringing in more than regular work, depending on what you find, and add more tools to your toolbox.

If you have the GI Bill and can't find employment... use your benefits- at least you'll be doing something for yourself and at the same time helping to support your family.
 
#60
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

Shit man, think about this for a second- you're a license paramedic I assume... Hell, you could see if anyone will just let you volunteer... Go to school for criminal justice- when you're done you will have a CJ degree and be an experienced and licensed paramedic- if you can't find a job with that sort of line-up, it's not the market, it's you! Fact- If you're smart and in shape, with what I just mentioned for school and experience... departments would love to hire a guy like you and put them on their EST, SWAT, or whatever they want to call it.

And if you want, Join the navy, marines, air force or army reserves/ national guard. Hell, ever consider being a flight medic? Not sure how far from Grand Ledge you are, but it sounds like you're in Michigan... NG has a med flight unit out of Grand Ledge. Go be an MP or apply to the PA program which I hear they are desperately in need of people for.

You've got options man, you just have to decide what route to take- and think outside of the box.
 
#61
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: DP425</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Shit man, think about this for a second- you're a license paramedic I assume... Hell, you could see if anyone will just let you volunteer... Go to school for criminal justice- when you're done you will have a CJ degree and be an experienced and licensed paramedic- if you can't find a job with that sort of line-up, it's not the market, it's you! Fact- If you're smart and in shape, with what I just mentioned for school and experience... departments would love to hire a guy like you and put them on their EST, SWAT, or whatever they want to call it.
</div></div>

There have to be at least 20 people applying for every cop job I have ever seen. This has to be the most foolish advice I've seen in this thread.

I do think that the OP should get a job. And I do think he should continue to look for a medic job, which will pay plenty.

A professional license, in anything, limits the number of people who can take your job. You have one now. And once you start using it, it'll pay off.

A degree in "criminal justice" is just a piece of paper. A Paramedic license is not.

Good luck.
 
#62
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Downzero</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: DP425</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Shit man, think about this for a second- you're a license paramedic I assume... Hell, you could see if anyone will just let you volunteer... Go to school for criminal justice- when you're done you will have a CJ degree and be an experienced and licensed paramedic- if you can't find a job with that sort of line-up, it's not the market, it's you! Fact- If you're smart and in shape, with what I just mentioned for school and experience... departments would love to hire a guy like you and put them on their EST, SWAT, or whatever they want to call it.
</div></div>

There have to be at least 20 people applying for every cop job I have ever seen. This has to be the most foolish advice I've seen in this thread.

I do think that the OP should get a job. And I do think he should continue to look for a medic job, which will pay plenty.

A professional license, in anything, limits the number of people who can take your job. You have one now. And once you start using it, it'll pay off.

A degree in "criminal justice" is just a piece of paper. A Paramedic license is not.

Good luck. </div></div>

I think you may have been missing my point here- yes, there are a ton of people applying. But how many have a degree and 3-4 years experience as a paramedic? That license and some added experience alone would make him damn near gold for a tac team. It's not about how many people are applying if you can distinguish yourself from the group, and a degree with a license and 4yrs experience as a paramedic will certainly jump him to the top. In the same respect, expanding his medical training and education would also set him apart if apply for a paramedic or tech job. The point is more considering how to diversify yourself in a particular field, both with what you already have and what you have within your ability to accomplish.

Now if I said oh just forget the medic stuff- go get a CJ degree and be a cop... then yes, that would be every foolish advise.

Anyway, if you really want the most foolish advise, go back a number of posts where he's being told to get any job he can... despite the fact that once child care is factored in, he may actually be in a way paying to go to work.


Oh and OP, I don't know how long you've been out of training, but a previous poster made mention of employment history having to do with marketability... that's very true, except for if you've been in school. Being unemployed for a long time looks very bad- unless it was for educational purposes. But it's a narrow window between "student" and "excessively unemployed"

 
#63
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

Being "unemployed" for "educational purposes" means that you weren't unemployed--you're just not a member of the work force during that time.
 
#64
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Downzero</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Being "unemployed" for "educational purposes" means that you weren't unemployed--you're just not a member of the work force during that time. </div></div>

That's what I was saying... But that the window between just finished school or training and being unemployed for too long is a fairly short window.
 
#65
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

I just finished my schooling about 1 1/2 months ago. I've been hitting the job search hard. Even been looking out of state. I really do appreciate the advice of the many and understand the fine line between student and unemployed.....that's not where I want to be.

I'm located in Grand Rapids, Mi. I have been looking into the flight medic thing, however all the major flight care places require a nurseing degree. This is why I am looking out of state. A flight medic is where I would really like to be.....doesn't mean I am going to hold out for that position only. I will take a medic position with an ambulance company first if that is what is presented.
 
#66
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Triman2008</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I just finished my schooling about 1 1/2 months ago. I've been hitting the job search hard. Even been looking out of state. I really do appreciate the advice of the many and understand the fine line between student and unemployed.....that's not where I want to be.

I'm located in Grand Rapids, Mi. I have been looking into the flight medic thing, however all the major flight care places require a nurseing degree. This is why I am looking out of state. A flight medic is where I would really like to be.....doesn't mean I am going to hold out for that position only. <span style="font-weight: bold">I will take a medic position with an ambulance company first if that is what is presented. </span>

</div></div>
Everyone wants to be a flight medic because it so "cool." Agencies know this, can be picky, and pay shit. Even here in Calif flight medics make shit. Plus there are weight and height limitations. I'd be shocked to hear of a medic with no experienced being picked up on a flight crew. Possible but not likely.

Something I think you should consider is getting hired as an EMT (if the position is available) to get your foot in the door, so to speak. Any company is going to upgrade EMT's on staff prior to hiring off the street.
 
#67
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

RobG,

It's not like I have zero experience in a helicopter, I have over 1000 hours flight time and that is something you can train a person to have when looking to hire. Not to mention a couple hundred hours of combat time.(The pertinence of this is saying I have a level head in "OH SHIT" situations) I'm not saying I am a direct admit for the job, but I am definately a step above the next guy. As for the EMT, I am trying that route too. Like you said, they promote from staff first....then hire new.
 
#68
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

Consider joining the national guard to be a flight medic- can only help, will also bring in a bit more cash, go to school for nursing with your GI bill after your guard training. When you stack everything up, it would put you closer to the front of the pack
 
#69
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

All these people yelling get a job, did you not see my post where I linked state supplied information on childcare costs?

Get a job and have a negative income due to associated cost of said job? Yeah, that's just fucking brilliant.

The man wasn't sitting on his nuts, ass, or anything; the man was going to school for a skill set and certification/license that would help him provide for his family. He's been out of school less than 3 months.

If the situation were not as he described, i.e. no kids, or no kids of the ages they are, I'd totally agree.

The fact of the matter is that "any" job could, and likely would, bite them in the financial ass.

If he has associated costs such as childcare, that HAS to be factored into the feasibility of taking said job.

His wife is obviously not in a position to drop her job, and he is in a position to save them money by taking care of the kids until he gets a job that makes things worth it.

All you guys screaming " be a man" this "get a job, any job" that, do some fucking math or shut the fuck up.
 
#70
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

Thanks CS1983....not too many people out there are looking at it from that stand point. Yeah my kids are 1 and 3....daycare would be a bitch.

I have not thought about the National Gaurd as a flight medic. I will look into that option. Plus, having a Military time served already can't hurt, right?
 
#71
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: CS1983</div><div class="ubbcode-body">

Get a job and have a negative income due to associated cost of said job? Yeah, that's just fucking brilliant.

(snip)

All you guys screaming " be a man" this "get a job, any job" that, do some fucking math or shut the fuck up. </div></div>

The problem is assuming that the only "cost" is the explicit "cost" of working: the income minus the cost of child care.

The fact is that is a really ignorant and stupid way to make any decision. The proper "cost" of not working includes the fact that it's harder to find a job if you don't have one, and if and when you do find a job, you're not worth as much if you're not working.

Limiting "costs" to the explicit outlays of $$$ (like an accountant would) ignorantly ignores the loss of actual economic value from not working.

If you're going to pretend you're engaging in amateur microeconomic analysis, at least do it correctly.
 
#72
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

There is not much that I can say that others havn't said, but I'm going to comment anyway. You need to love on the wife, she has sacrificed much for you and the children. It is unreasonable to ask her to move. Her job is secure...secure enough to support a family of four. That's not an easy task.

I'm not sure about this, but in my area I don't think a paramedic job will support a family by itself. The exception to this would be a fireman. On that subject, you ought to look into becoming a fireman it seems it would be right up your alley.

In the mean time, remember that man is supposed to work...period. That is part of the reason we were created by God.

Genesis 2:15
The LORD God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it.

Love that wife that you have and fight for your marriage!
 
#73
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

I'm in the get a job, any job camp. I know it may not financially be the best option, but in the long run having a job will lead to a better job that IS financially better. Waiting until your kids are in school all day to take a job is career suicide. If you have a several year gap in employment and nothing to show for it employers aren't going to take a chance on you.

I know nothing about being a paramedic so I can't help you there. But, what my suggestion would be is to do something else besides being a paramedic. Start your own lawncare business, or home repair, painting......whatever you can to show you aren't just constantly "looking". Employers are going to ask themselves "why hasn't this guy been hired in the last 4 years?" and pass you over if you can't show them you are employable.
 
#74
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Triman2008</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Thanks CS1983....not too many people out there are looking at it from that stand point. Yeah my kids are 1 and 3....daycare would be a bitch.

I have not thought about the National Gaurd as a flight medic. I will look into that option. Plus, having a Military time served already can't hurt, right? </div></div>


I have a friend or two in the assault flight unit out of Grand Ledge (there is also a Med Flight unit there too)- they get twice the number of training periods than the standard NG member in order to keep current on flight time. So while it would take you away from your family, it would also provide a decent chunk of spare change, and you can usually work around your availability for the extra flight time (standard drill isn't really negotiable).

And of course, you would have whatever amount of time required to do your training that would provide an income. And I'm sure you would at least retain some of your previous rank. If you would like some contact information for a recruiter/career counselor, shoot me a PM and I'll locate someone for you who will actually have detailed information.

The NG also has a few fire-fighter positions as well- these mainly operate at Grayling Army Airfield and there may be a couple at Grand Ledge. But I imagine the training transfers over, and with the addition of training on aircraft and airfield fire fighting.

Also might be worth looking into the Air National Guard- they have medic positions and also firefighting positions at both Battle Creek and Selfridge Airbase.


I don't want to come across as sounding like this is the solution to all of your problems, but it may be a good stepping stone and at the very least will provide a little more income.
 
#76
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Downzero</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: CS1983</div><div class="ubbcode-body">

Get a job and have a negative income due to associated cost of said job? Yeah, that's just fucking brilliant.

(snip)

All you guys screaming " be a man" this "get a job, any job" that, do some fucking math or shut the fuck up. </div></div>

The problem is assuming that the only "cost" is the explicit "cost" of working: the income minus the cost of child care.

The fact is that is a really ignorant and stupid way to make any decision. The proper "cost" of not working includes the fact that it's harder to find a job if you don't have one, and if and when you do find a job, you're not worth as much if you're not working.

Limiting "costs" to the explicit outlays of $$$ (like an accountant would) ignorantly ignores the loss of actual economic value from not working.

If you're going to pretend you're engaging in amateur microeconomic analysis, at least do it correctly.</div></div>

You provide reproof, but no proof; if you're gonna question the numbers laid forth, lay forth numbers.

You are correct in a certain regard that not working hurts his prospects later on of getting a job, however, he's only technically been "not working" for less than 3 months.

IF, and only IF (until you PROVE me wrong), he could get a job in which childcare costs are NOT a factor, then you would be totally correct.

However, the fact remains that the spirit and proofs of the arguments laid forth thus far deal with societal concepts and philosophy on what a "man" is, or is not, and how his actions determine that.

As I see it, he is being prudent with his money. For what it's worth, laying down numbers as an accountant would was meant to answer the failed rhetoric of previous posters which rested on a foundation on imprudent machismo, rather than prudent masculinity which dictates he, as the husband, not put the family in a worse position for his mere ego, nor the exhortations towards others' projected egos in the same.

Edit to add:

In the end, it will be an accountant who deals with the failure or success of the decision he makes, but his family is going to feel the effect in the meanwhile.

A job, in concept, is ultimately a modality for providing for one's family and self. The goal, providing, is not met when the family suffers a negative income due to him "manning" up, no matter how much it can be argued either way. Show me a man that loses money to provide for those under his care, thus hurting the stated goal, and I'll show you an idiot without flipping the slide.

 
#77
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: High Binder</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: welfordnremt</div><div class="ubbcode-body">80 Paramedics or 80 EMT's

I may not can find the most wanted or highest paying job, but a paramedic can find a job without hurting themselves.
</div></div>

Oh, I thought they were the same thing. </div></div>
Are you being serious? Do you really think a Paramedic and an EMT are the same thing?
 
#79
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

Congrats. Reading this thread was touch and go there for a while. I wasn't sure what you were going to do.

Now it's time to build some emotional capital and be a leader.
 
#80
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: WhiskeyWebber</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Now it's time to build some emotional capital and be a leader. </div></div>

Thanks. Very true. Things have already started to change in her attitude, and the way she conducts herself in the house. Even I have changed. Thnings are looking better.
 
#82
Re: Not one to "air out his dirty laundry"

Missed this thread until now. Congratulations from someone who was in the same boat. Just about brought a tear to my eye to read the thread and remember what it felt like to go through that. I was "fired" by my dept. manager when he came in staggering drunk in a bad mood one night. I went to school to be a cnc machinist, while looking for a job.....any job. The economy was in it's slump then, and I couldn't find work. Felt so worthless, I just wanted to off myself, and my wifes attitude, and remarks didn't help. Now I've got my old job back, but in a better position with the machining education, and the drunk Manager has been fired. Things have improved greatly with my wife and kids. Glad you stuck with it, and made it work out!
Congrats again.
 
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