Overtorquers Anonymous

[KYpatriot]

The wife had a coupon and took her jeep to a quick lube place for an oil change. so the next time im in my garage with the jeep for a 30 min oil change with a 6 month old in a play pen down for a nap. drain the oil pan, no problem. filter, tighter than hand tight, oh yeah quick lube changed it last. filter wrench, damn shits tight. next oil filter twists in half. those mother fuckers. baby wakes and is crying. asshole in meat truck drives up.
hey you want to buy some steaks?

no im busy.
he proceeds with the hard line approach. I contemplate shooting him(jokingly)
i tell him to get the hell off my property.
baby still crying.
threaded part of filter had to be chiseled off at a tangent to loosen up.

3 fucking hrs.

never in all of my shade tree mechanic-ing from axle rebuilds while chained to a tree on the side of a mtn in the mud and snow, to head gaskets, clutches, new pistons, brakes, water pumps, manifold studs, never have i experienced a more wanton waste of torque, nor have ever been soo fucking pissed.

fuck you oil change guy/steak peddler

Now that's getting there. Teachin that baby right. I learned from my dad the proper way to get mad....

When I was a youngster during the drought of 83 I was "helping" my dad do some plumbing on our old farmhouse. He had recently crushed a couple vertebrae twisting his back throwing a waterlogged haybale that had been too close to a spring, from the ground up onto the top run of a wagon load of hay. It was a miserable summer made worse with a bad injury. After about two weeks of barely hobbling around, our water heater then goes out and leaks everywhere. It's July, about 97,000 degrees, and he is wrastlin this old water heater out of the house by himself with his messed up back and of course we had no AC so he is primed for an epic fit of anger.

He gets the dang water heater out to the backporch and what do we hear but some voices from over the hill, back on our pond, somebody fishin on our own pond without askin! My dad says #?!!% no way is someone gonna fish, on my land, enjoying themselves why I'm workin like a dog with a down back in this heat #%%#! So he hops in the 69 Ford F100 with three on the tree and I follow like a shadow, and we are throwin dirt tearing up over that hill and I'm scared to even look at him. I'm thinkin Lord he is gonna kill these two poor SOBs with a rusty pipe wrench as sure as I'm bouncing around this cab.

We get up there and he brakes in a cloud of dust and rage, jumps out and what we behold I couldn't have guessed in a hundred years. Two of the oldest women I ever saw, in old timey black dresses, have one of the biggest snapping turtles I ever saw halfway up the bank and jumping around like they got a tiger by the tail. One of those grannies is on the end of big pair of channel locks, with that turtle bit onto onto the other end, in a life or death tug of war. The other granny has a big ball peen hammer she can barely lift and is droppin it onto his bloody head. There they are half in the pond in a muddy three way duel for the soup pot. Did I mention it was 97 billion degrees and about a million percent humidity and too hot even for dragonflies?

My dad looks at that and I guess he figures he ain't mad enough yet to tangle with two old bittys like that. The drive down was a lot quieter lol. Good thing I guess, I think he was gonna go to jail that day.

You know I miss that truck. It was rusty yellow with a red door. He traded it for a double barrel shotgun, sometime later.

 

[mike.h.]

Picked up a "fat wrench" from midway. Very user friendly

 

[species0113]

Lent a buddy my 20-150 ft lb snap-on tw once. he needed it to work on his dirtbike. i didnt give it too much thought. i just figured he was gonna hit an axle nut or something. he brings it back all pissed at me saying its out of calibration and that he snapped every bolt off in his clutch basket. lol. dumb sob. I can see one. maybe 2... lol, but all of em? he now knows the difference between ft lb and in lb.

 

[thejeep]

Screwdriver tight. You drive a long screwdriver through it and they come right off.

tried the screwdriver. started ripping the metal casing. at one point right after the screw driver i rigged a strap wrench on the filter. the end of the strap was tied to the crossmember/axle of the jack wheels. the jeep was then jacked up tightening the strap and applying CCw twisting force to the filter twisting it in half. The baby was crying.

Slight highjack
The only job stupider than this one. was when i decided to adjust the valves on my dirt bike after a trip to the bar at 2 am. When i was bolting the tappit covers back on i dropped a bolt down the cam chain tunnel. no problem ill use the magnet on a stick. cant find the magnet. no problem ill make an electromagnet with my car battery and some speaker wire and a coat hanger. to this day i'm sure it would have worked had it not caught on fire, necessitating the complete removal of the head instead of just the removing and replacing of 4 tappit cover bolts. 30min job turned into 5 hrs. it happened again one day when i was showing my dad how easy it was. he said oh shit. i said no problem wheres your magnet.

 

[thejeep]

Now that's getting there. Teachin that baby right. I learned from my dad the proper way to get mad....

When I was a youngster during the drought of 83 I was "helping" my dad do some plumbing on our old farmhouse. He had recently crushed a couple vertebrae twisting his back throwing a waterlogged haybale that had been too close to a spring, from the ground up onto the top run of a wagon load of hay. It was a miserable summer made worse with a bad injury. After about two weeks of barely hobbling around, our water heater then goes out and leaks everywhere. It's July, about 97,000 degrees, and he is wrastlin this old water heater out of the house by himself with his messed up back and of course we had no AC so he is primed for an epic fit of anger.

He gets the dang water heater out to the backporch and what do we hear but some voices from over the hill, back on our pond, somebody fishin on our own pond without askin! My dad says #?!!% no way is someone gonna fish, on my land, enjoying themselves why I'm workin like a dog with a down back in this heat #%%#! So he hops in the 69 Ford F100 with three on the tree and I follow like a shadow, and we are throwin dirt tearing up over that hill and I'm scared to even look at him. I'm thinkin Lord he is gonna kill these two poor SOBs with a rusty pipe wrench as sure as I'm bouncing around this cab.

We get up there and he brakes in a cloud of dust and rage, jumps out and what we behold I couldn't have guessed in a hundred years. Two of the oldest women I ever saw, in old timey black dresses, have one of the biggest snapping turtles I ever saw halfway up the bank and jumping around like they got a tiger by the tail. One of those grannies is on the end of big pair of channel locks, with that turtle bit onto onto the other end, in a life or death tug of war. The other granny has a big ball peen hammer she can barely lift and is droppin it onto his bloody head. There they are half in the pond in a muddy three way duel for the soup pot. Did I mention it was 97 billion degrees and about a million percent humidity and too hot even for dragonflies?

My dad looks at that and I guess he figures he ain't mad enough yet to tangle with two old bittys like that. The drive down was a lot quieter lol. Good thing I guess, I think he was gonna go to jail that day.

You know I miss that truck. It was rusty yellow with a red door. He traded it for a double barrel shotgun, sometime later.

I dont know what it is but dads can sure get pissed. 2 weeks ago i was helping my dad change a u joint on his f350, dana 80 drw. due to the angle only a box end wrench would fit on the flange studs. So my dad who is 62 is twisting the wrench and cussing like i ve only heard one other man ( a pediatric cardio thorasic surgeon while chopping open a new borns chest, it was ridiculous they went through three anesthesia providers in like 15min because they were soo nervous) . so my dad gets 4 studs unbolted before we need to rotate the shaft and hes cussing. i tell him to relax before he has a stroke and glance at one of the studs. what do you know, someone had dosed them with red lock tite. the torch really helped after that.

Also in the garage that day i re-found one of my most prized possessions. a bent lower control arm with one of the ends cut off from my 1995 landcruiser. it is the most awesome breaker bar i have used. the bend is crucial for torquing in different positions.

 

[dddoo7]

I broke a kholer elite toilet bowl one day. I was helping a friend change out the leaking gasket between the tank and bowl while he was at work. When the ear cracked my first idea was, "he will never notice". The second thought that ran through my head was to tell him, "well here's your problem". Instead I ran two towns over to find the exact same toilet bowl in stock and changed it out without him ever knowing.


If you are installing toilets...the bolts are tight 1/4 turn before the toilet cracks.

 

[KYpatriot]

Copy turn until cracking noise then back off a quarter turn.

 

[Guest]

I found my Borka, but I've already bought a Fat Wrench, which seems to fit my own needs better.
I think I bought this on the original group buy on the Hide. Obviously, I've never used it.

What's it worth?
I want to sell it, but I have no idea what to ask for it.

 

[SPEAK338]

Tucker,
I will give you $15 and I pay shipping

 

[CMH]

Always good to start bidding low.

 

[UCChris]

$20 bucks and I'll pay shipping.

But seriously, this is the best thread on the 'Hide. I cranked right through a Burris ring the other day...

 

[EXTREMEPREJUDICE]

What's it worth?

Ummmmm......................priceless!

 

[Llatikcuf]

I don't always cross thread a bolt....but when I do I use an impact till that sucker's tight.

The Most Interesting Mechanic in the World

 

[dddoo7]

Overtorquers Anonymous

I was waiting for my tires to be mounted and balanced and watched one of the mechanics cross thread a lug nut on someone else's car. He then proceeded to put the impact on it and run it almost all the way down. Just shy of tight the lug bolt turned loose in the back and began spinning. The mechanic reached his hand down and grabbed the lug nut. Didn't take him long to let go of it. Lol. Then he torqued the other three nuts, installed the hubcap and sent the customer on his way. Needless to say...I will not be back there.

 

[Rthur]

Frame bolt on a 4020 John Deere. It was at least a 1/2 bolt. Recessed so welding a nut on it was going to take David Copperfield.


R

 

[shootist2004]

if you work on cars ....these are better then heli coils...


++ TIME-SERT Threaded inserts for stripped threads, threaded inserts, thread repair stripped sparkplug's, Ford sparkplug blowouts, threaded inserts threaded, repair stripped threads, stripped threads, inserts threaded inserts, Ford spark plug repair,

 

[Headquarterz]

I've never seen that, but we had a burly old truck driver / master level curser of a neighbor who could sling one of those $88 20" push mowers like he was going for the gold in the Summer games.
Our bathroom had a window facing into their backyard, and I was in there taking a dump one day. I was maybe 13 or 14. We didn't have AC, and it was one of those days when you got off the toilet seat you have to push that bitch down to keep it from sticking to your ass.

I heard "brmmmmm........ GODAMMIT!.............brmmmmm sput-pluft.......... YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!!..................brmmmmmmm...chik...chik....prrrft................YOUMOTHERUCKINSUMBTICH!!!!!!!!

I hurried up and finished so I could get to the window and peek out.
Just in time to see him grab that mower by the push handle, and wheel and spin like he was going to throw a discus to the moon.
That thing had to go 20 yards or better, flipped and rolled three times and landed upright.
He stomped over to it, placed his foot on the deck, grabbed the handle, and yanked.
Brrrrrrmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm! Purring like a kitten!

I told his kids that story at their old man's funeral. They laughed like Hell.

That is classic right there. Thanks for the laugh

 

[Maggot]

I've never seen that, but we had a burly old truck driver / master level curser of a neighbor who could sling one of those $88 20" push mowers like he was going for the gold in the Summer games.
Our bathroom had a window facing into their backyard, and I was in there taking a dump one day. I was maybe 13 or 14. We didn't have AC, and it was one of those days when you got off the toilet seat you have to push that bitch down to keep it from sticking to your ass.

I heard "brmmmmm........ GODAMMIT!.............brmmmmm sput-pluft.......... YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!!..................brmmmmmmm...chik...chik....prrrft................YOUMOTHERUCKINSUMBTICH!!!!!!!!

I hurried up and finished so I could get to the window and peek out.
Just in time to see him grab that mower by the push handle, and wheel and spin like he was going to throw a discus to the moon.
That thing had to go 20 yards or better, flipped and rolled three times and landed upright.
He stomped over to it, placed his foot on the deck, grabbed the handle, and yanked.
Brrrrrrmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm! Purring like a kitten!

I told his kids that story at their old man's funeral. They laughed like Hell.

Good story. When all else fails, a hammer applied well often helps, or a foot, or a good throw. You need for your machinery to fear you.

 

[cwinner]

I think this thread has jinxed me

Now to fixing it!


CJW

 

[Roadwild17]

Hi guys, my name is Roadwild and I have broken something.

I cracked the flange on a 345KV bushing turret on a 600MVA auto-transformer after being re-gasketed. Took about 3 months to get a replacement turret. (not the exact unit, but you get the idea)

 

[powdahound76]

Snap On and Lisle both make tools for that very problem.


Sent from my IPhone 5S.

Lisle tools is an awesome company for those of you who do not know them. Make most of the really good tools for the big names. Located near my home town. My grandma used to work for them. They have kept it family owned as to keep it in the same town and US owned and operated, having passed up some pretty sweet buy-out offers over the years. I buy their tools whenever I can. Still have my first filter wrench i was given by a floor manager there, as I used to watch the guy and gal who welded them when I was a kid.
Sorry for derail, carry on.

 

[Guest]

I think this thread has jinxed meView attachment 50153

Now to fixing it!


CJW

Damn!

 

[rideHPD]

We were setting up a vacuum chamber and tubing in our lab where we were connecting 2" diameter copper fixtures to each other with Teflon tape. Guy who designed it said not to skimp on the tape and when I started to tighten the fixture and clock it right there was way too much resistance. He insisted on me manhandling into place despite my protests, as I didn't think he appreciated my strength and thought we needed less tape and less elbow grease. Ended up popping the threads off the elbow fixture like a slinky. Turned out that fixture was $300+. No one asks me to help with flimsy things, but if an oven needs to be moved guess who gets the knock.