We've had a Wife & Girl Friend thread, tell us about the crazy that
- Thread starter Gunfighter14e2
- Start date
I've told my story a few times on here, not going to go into it again, I'll just tell you what I learned from it:
Think before you breed.
Think before you breed.
Took place after my divorce, we were both in our 40's and we were making out on her couch after she fixed me a really nice dinner. Found a can of mace under the cushion and that sparked a conversation. She later told me that she had been married once before for about a week. She said she got pissed and locked her new husband in the basement and set the house on fire....She was a pretty hot redhead (no pun intended) with new boobs but I never went back.
That is the issue with buying a flat chest, tits. As you may be buying them for someone else. Home grown are much better than American made.
“She’s so fine there’s no telling where the money went,” has been the cause of much of my financial suffering through many adventures.
In my early thirties, I briefly dated a girl. I stayed at her house one night, in the middle of the night, I awoke to moaning. She was diddlying herself mad crazy. Of course I joined in.
This began happening all the time, while driving, in restuarants, while watching tv. She would do it while cooking. I thought it was her way of getting me worked up.
One day were ate at her family event and sitting next to me at the dinner table, her dad to the right, she starts in. Im hard as a rock, but this seems wildly inappropriate. Her dad notices and does this eye movement thing and head bob, as if telling her to leave the table. She did, and I wasnt going to follow, but I wanted. Few minutes later I could hear her finish with everyone else at the table. They all pretended as though nothing just fucking happened.
After we left, it made me inquire. Turned out it was some tick she developed as a kid. They had to make special accomodations for her at school, at her job, etc. Here Im thinking she just trying to initiate sex.
After she told me, I was kinda ok with it, but then getting it out there, it opened the flood gates. Every 2-3 hours this girl had to diddle herself to orgasm. It was fine for a few weeks, but it got crazy awkward at times. We had to schedule things around her diddling.
When we were taking my friends out to dinner and she started diddling herself in the backseat next to my buddies gf, that was the last of it for me.
Everybody here will think it sounds great, but trust me, it is not! Think about your life if your partner had to masturbate every hour some days.
This began happening all the time, while driving, in restuarants, while watching tv. She would do it while cooking. I thought it was her way of getting me worked up.
One day were ate at her family event and sitting next to me at the dinner table, her dad to the right, she starts in. Im hard as a rock, but this seems wildly inappropriate. Her dad notices and does this eye movement thing and head bob, as if telling her to leave the table. She did, and I wasnt going to follow, but I wanted. Few minutes later I could hear her finish with everyone else at the table. They all pretended as though nothing just fucking happened.
After we left, it made me inquire. Turned out it was some tick she developed as a kid. They had to make special accomodations for her at school, at her job, etc. Here Im thinking she just trying to initiate sex.
After she told me, I was kinda ok with it, but then getting it out there, it opened the flood gates. Every 2-3 hours this girl had to diddle herself to orgasm. It was fine for a few weeks, but it got crazy awkward at times. We had to schedule things around her diddling.
When we were taking my friends out to dinner and she started diddling herself in the backseat next to my buddies gf, that was the last of it for me.
Everybody here will think it sounds great, but trust me, it is not! Think about your life if your partner had to masturbate every hour some days.
I learned that banging my redheaded chick friend's hot mom was against the rules. I told her I was going to and she laughed at me and said I should try.
She was lying. The best sex comes from the craziest chicks.
She was lying. The best sex comes from the craziest chicks.
Not mine but a roommate’s and not super dramatica. But even this was alarming to me.
He went out on a few dates with some girl then the calls and texts got increasingly crazier. Saying she was spying on him and talking about how they were going to be a great couple when she got pregnant. Some of the classics, you know? I was on a date with the blessedly boring woman that I would end up marrying when I get a call from him saying to check the house when we got back(can’t remember where he was). She told him that she was waiting in the house for him… So we get done with our night and I grab my gun, turn all the lights on, & open all rooms but she’s not there(thankfully). She was in a parking spot waiting for him to get home but I never knew what car she drove so I couldn’t cut the middleman out and have this chat with her directly. I wasn’t mad at him so our convo didn’t get heated but I’m sure you can guess the gist. Something short and sweet like “Tell this fucking bitch to forget where this place is, now”. Thankfully she was a tiny bit smarter than she was crazy and got the not-so-subtle hint
He went out on a few dates with some girl then the calls and texts got increasingly crazier. Saying she was spying on him and talking about how they were going to be a great couple when she got pregnant. Some of the classics, you know? I was on a date with the blessedly boring woman that I would end up marrying when I get a call from him saying to check the house when we got back(can’t remember where he was). She told him that she was waiting in the house for him… So we get done with our night and I grab my gun, turn all the lights on, & open all rooms but she’s not there(thankfully). She was in a parking spot waiting for him to get home but I never knew what car she drove so I couldn’t cut the middleman out and have this chat with her directly. I wasn’t mad at him so our convo didn’t get heated but I’m sure you can guess the gist. Something short and sweet like “Tell this fucking bitch to forget where this place is, now”. Thankfully she was a tiny bit smarter than she was crazy and got the not-so-subtle hint
I got stabbed by a girl I had never met but who had concocted an entire life with me (that she told everyone about). Bitches be crazy
Not a girlfriend/wife thing, but back in Dec. 1986 (was still AD A.F. at Norton, in So. Cal.) I was off-roading in an old used F-250, up in the Big Bear Mts.. Reeeeal long story, short, F'd it up by sliding down a ravine. Had to walk out, got about 8, or so, miles under my waffle-stomper hiking boots, now this was Christmas day mind you, and a car finally stopped and offered me a ride to town (Redlands). No one else was on the road (imagine that).
Got in, took a look around, and what did I see? Woman was dressed in all Goth (black nails, black hair, black lipstick, black eye make-up, list goes on), had a F'n Raven in a bird cage in the back seat. I think it was a Honda Civic, or some shit. I was desperate.
She asked me where I was heading and I told her...home. Well, during the drive there, she was asking me questions about who/what I believed in and if I got into seances. Said...NO!
She kept asking me for my address, and the street I lived on. I did not/would not tell her and I made her drop me off under the 10 Freeway under a F'n overpass. Not a way in hell, was I going to let her take me to my apartment (still had over a mile to go). She probably would have invited herself in and performed a F'n ritual, pentagram and all (along with that F'n bird supervising that whole shit-show) with me being the sacrificial "Lamb".
That's about as close to crazy I've come to. At least, to my memory. I have had some pretty wild drunks (long, long time ago) tho. My shit is squared now. Mac
Got in, took a look around, and what did I see? Woman was dressed in all Goth (black nails, black hair, black lipstick, black eye make-up, list goes on), had a F'n Raven in a bird cage in the back seat. I think it was a Honda Civic, or some shit. I was desperate.
She asked me where I was heading and I told her...home. Well, during the drive there, she was asking me questions about who/what I believed in and if I got into seances. Said...NO!
She kept asking me for my address, and the street I lived on. I did not/would not tell her and I made her drop me off under the 10 Freeway under a F'n overpass. Not a way in hell, was I going to let her take me to my apartment (still had over a mile to go). She probably would have invited herself in and performed a F'n ritual, pentagram and all (along with that F'n bird supervising that whole shit-show) with me being the sacrificial "Lamb".
That's about as close to crazy I've come to. At least, to my memory. I have had some pretty wild drunks (long, long time ago) tho. My shit is squared now. Mac
I think I work with her. We call her "Spicy Nice".
She told the Judge we were having a baby and getting married......the Judge got salty when i said "damn, must've been crappy sex since I dont remember it"
Dated the hot fit girl who is all bubbly and friendly and flirty. The one you see at every upscale gym in town or the nice clubs. Family was rich paid for all her stuff. We had a big fight and her voice changed it got all low pitched and her demeanor/vocabulary were completely different. Later on she accused me of a bunch of stuff. Bitch was a demon.
As a general rule- if any young man is courting a potential suitor, they would be well advised to avoid women that own horses. Not only do you have a real chance of playing second fiddle to the horses, they'll also likely bring you to financial ruin supporting the horse(s).
#IYKYK
-LD
#IYKYK
-LD
Barrel racers are the pinnacle of crazy horse chicks. They’ll usually also have a blue heeler that’ll bite the piss out of you for absolutely no reason.
Also, I didn’t learn that lesson the first two times
Holy smokes, you doubled down!? You have my sincere sympathies sir. Best of luck to you moving forward, have you considered starting a 'Go Fund Me' account?Barrel racers are the pinnacle of crazy horse chicks. They’ll usually also have a blue heeler that’ll bite the piss out of you for absolutely no reason.
Also, I didn’t learn that lesson the first two times
-LD
Had a smoking hot (as in had been a contender in a few beauty pageants hot) gf for a couple months when I was 21 that I affectionally refer to as The Loony Bitch. We were fucking within 15 minutes of 1st meeting. She liked to fuck in public. Went to a movie with my buddy and his gf, she blew me in his backseat. This chick had 0 social graces, but damn she was fun!! 
Anyway, while I was drunk and asleep one night, she opened a can of beets and threw it all over my clothes in the closet. Then she left and walked a couple blocks away to a pay phone, called the cops and said I was going to shoot her. So 3 cops come into my room with guns drawn, she had come back and let them in. Asked if I had a gun, yes. Was it loaded, of course. Luckily I was acquainted with one of them so they left before too long.
Anyway, while I was drunk and asleep one night, she opened a can of beets and threw it all over my clothes in the closet. Then she left and walked a couple blocks away to a pay phone, called the cops and said I was going to shoot her. So 3 cops come into my room with guns drawn, she had come back and let them in. Asked if I had a gun, yes. Was it loaded, of course. Luckily I was acquainted with one of them so they left before too long.
I dated a teacher who made amateur porn once, that went poorly.
I dated a red head before that that was incredible in the sack and questionable otherwise. She had previously been married to a highly successful doctor and he had left his family for her astoundingly perfect pussy and flawless tits. As it progressed I learned how she destroyed his life like a heroin addiction. Oh, and she loved being tied up, blindfolded, gagged and fucked. When he crossed her, she turned him in to the IRS, nearly bankrupted him, destroyed his practice and almost sent him to prison. He fled to the midwest and divorced her by mail.
I kept her as a booty call for a while and never let her near my home or life. She was incredible in the day. Saw her 20 years later, she is a saggy, wrinkled shitshow. She aged like rotting meat.
I dated a red head before that that was incredible in the sack and questionable otherwise. She had previously been married to a highly successful doctor and he had left his family for her astoundingly perfect pussy and flawless tits. As it progressed I learned how she destroyed his life like a heroin addiction. Oh, and she loved being tied up, blindfolded, gagged and fucked. When he crossed her, she turned him in to the IRS, nearly bankrupted him, destroyed his practice and almost sent him to prison. He fled to the midwest and divorced her by mail.
I kept her as a booty call for a while and never let her near my home or life. She was incredible in the day. Saw her 20 years later, she is a saggy, wrinkled shitshow. She aged like rotting meat.
That's a good one.
A friend of mine had a girlfriend who went psycho and stabbed his front door about 150 times with a screwdriver. He had taken money from her and bought a bunch of drugs with it so I guess he had it coming lol.
Oh yeah I banged her a couple times and she tried to stab me too.
