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whats is of value to you things or your family.

firefox

Sergeant
Full Member
Minuteman
Feb 27, 2005
551
0
ma hiking shooting
some of you know i have not been on here for awhile. there was a reason for that there was some things that happen to me i hope this will help others out. with in the last few years our family went through some rough times. my mom died i had to watch my dad die of cancer. i was in charge of my dads things both life and death, the doctor told me my dads had no chance of life he went into a comma so i was asked if i want to keep him on life support or pull the plug. i daid to the doctor my dad lived a long life he would not want this so i asked him to pull the plug i was in the room along and said my good buys, i MISS HIM, a year latter i was faceed with doing the same with my wife shes no longer here i misS HER, four days latter i got into a head on the doctor said i should not be here i was not wearing a belt needles to say the winsheild and my head had a meeting of the minds. i had lots of time to think through was was really important i am able to help my family more now. what can i offer to you say i love you to your wife and kids always make up if you have a fight enjoy them while you have been give this time a very short time in this life thanks.
 
Re: whats is of value to you things or your family.

not sure if you are a follower of christ but there is much comfort and help there my friend....prayers for you and yours.
 
Re: whats is of value to you things or your family.

You have gone through Alot I hope things get better for you and Thank you for taking the time to help others my prays are with you
 
Re: whats is of value to you things or your family.

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: VJJPunisher</div><div class="ubbcode-body">that was painful to read </div></div>

+1

 
Re: whats is of value to you things or your family.

Firefox, I continue to pray for you . My Lord , family , friends and my brothers and sisters in Christ are more important than things . We need things but should love people . When death and disaster strikes it usually puts everything into proper perspective .

david
 
Re: whats is of value to you things or your family.

FireFox, I've heard it said over and over again that if a couple that has been together decades and decades separate due to death that the other will soon follow. That is true love so prayers sent for them but I honestly believe we go to a better pain free place afterwards.

The pain is for us, the survivors.

Live life to it's fullest!
 
Re: whats is of value to you things or your family.

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Killswitch engage</div><div class="ubbcode-body">not sure if you are a follower of christ but there is much comfort and help there my friend....prayers for you and yours. </div></div>

I agree 100% on that, Christ and prayer have got me through times no man could or would. At the moment, everything I value is not in this world, but the next, so I'm not the best person to ask.

I sense there is even more going on here than just what the OP posted. I thought about adding a "guess the BAC when he posted that" pool (just a hunch, not an accusation); but my despair-sensing radar and the elevated-BAC-radar, not to mention a TBI to boot, are sometimes difficult to sort over the internet.

I am hoping there is someone around that goes shooting with him (or if not someone that lives near him that could go shooting with him, or just check in on him), and see if he needs help beyond lip-service. He's been with the 'Hide since 2005. We are family, someone gonna step up?
 
Re: whats is of value to you things or your family.


Hi Firefox,

Sorry to hear of your pain. Often there are greatly tortured circumstances that seem to twist the knife in the passing of a loved one or parent. I am 47, and all of my close buddies have lost their fathers to death in the last few years. Six weeks notice to a brain tumour, suddened failing of an inoperable heart embolism, another to a operation only to suddenly collapse and die taking a shower in hospital the next day.  My father had no history of ill health,  suddenly collapsed in my arms with a heart attack. I brought him home hospital a month later with huge relief to all the family, only he collapsed the first night at home. Only then did the doctors reveal his heart was too badly damaged, giving him 7 days; they were right. Huge pain, believing there was a recovery, only to have life snatched away. Holding a parents hand as they are dying, is an indescribable pain. I visited the hospital daily, but was 30 minutes arriving after he had passed. Used to be the first thing entering my mind upon waking each morning. None of my friends seem as tortured by parental death. None were living at home, as carers for their elderly parets as I was, they had jobs to loose themselves in. Some are just so focused on themselves, on their career, they become not very caring or empathic towards the suffering of others.  And, they have no time either, enslaved to careers and employers. 

I have the added grief of coping with two sets of parents; natural and adopted........ My birth mother had to turn off her husbands life support, 3 weeks after he broke his neck when his horse fell on him. He could only blink to communicate, and at 62 having been retired for 7 years, did not wish to live on totally paralysed & on a respirator. He rescued my natural mothers life 30 years earlier, from poor conduct & behaviour, and she relied on him for everything, though she does not admit it to any of it. 

I think one needs to be careful the pain of life does not cumulatively build and cause oneself a sudden unexpected health crises. I thought I was being careful with my health, until an illness suddenly overtook me. After two years illness and reflection, I now see in trying to get ahead and be "supposedly" successful in life, the stress it put me under for so many years, resulted in my illness. 

We grow up and live to aspire in a consumerist society, to 'values' that praise having material goods to define a sucessful life. During our formal education, there will have been no mention of the "Hedonic Set Point".  It is very difficult to explain to a lottery winner, that if they win $40M,  they will have only three to twelve months of extra happiness, before returning to their pre-lottery level of happiness.  Apparently, expectations rise in accord, and they will need to bring to bear the full  resources of their lottery win, to achieve the same level of happiness and satisfaction in life, to release the exact same level of endorphins that their brain would have released to them prior to their lottery win. Hence, one reverts to a hedonic set point. 

Gee