Anyone else find it nearly impossible to compete when you have small kids at home? Just curious how anyone else is able to pull it off. I have four kids (5 and under) and can't exactly disappear for the weekend...anyone else in a similar situation?
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Competing vs family life with small kids
- Thread starter MvHTjy
- Start date
Uh yeah bro. I hear ya. I coach 2 baseball teams and have 2 boys and it's all I can do to keep up with my business and that. This may not be what either of us want to hear, but I think we can hang it up until they get about 9 or so. You can still shoot now and then but between birthday parties and ball games and just trying to feed them and get them to bed and do schoolwork ect, it's a load! No way I can compete right now. I've had health issues here lately that have further caused delays in my new loading room and I haven't shot a damn thing in like a month or more. You can't compete like that.
Yeah…it wasnt possible. I took a long vacation from shooting. My youngest is in college now, so it’s slowly coming back. Once she’s graduated, I am hoping to get back to matches (and have a little more discretionary funds lol).
I think I can do it again once both of mine are old enough to be getting rides home from practice with others and such as that. My wife works for me but is a stay at home mom too and works from our house so, she can help a lot with that part of it. When they start school sports it should be possible I think.... I might be kidding myself though. I'm going to be very involved with my kids daily lives and if that means giving up shooting (the way we like to and normally do) then so be it. I'm hoping to get mine more involved in shooting too, which should help us both shoot more. Still too little to be left alone to shoot beside me at the range or something right now so, until that time comes it is what it is
Yea. Life when kids are that young is hectic and consumed. But when they get older then things shift back
Thats right. And when they are small is when you have the chance to make a real impression on them and teach and train them. You have to be there to do that. Lord knows we need all the alpha males we can get so, Dad needs to be there and be the right example for his children now more than ever.
You guys be dads first and foremost. I can't stress this enough. I can guarantee you will regret the time not spent with them and they will learn to cherish the time you did.
Alright, at least I'm not the only one! I might be grasping for my last sliver of hope here but this was my plan for next year...
1. limit to PRS Regional due to them being 1-day matches (minimum 3 matches per year and possibly the finale)
2. book a kid-friendly resort near the match, so the wife doesn't go crazy (great wolf lodge looks like a potential, awesome option)
3. spend first day (saturday) as a family day, compete on sunday, relax monday and head home
I don't know, I might have to just throw in the towel and be happy with taking the occasional friday off practicing at the range while the kids are at school/daycare.
1. limit to PRS Regional due to them being 1-day matches (minimum 3 matches per year and possibly the finale)
2. book a kid-friendly resort near the match, so the wife doesn't go crazy (great wolf lodge looks like a potential, awesome option)
3. spend first day (saturday) as a family day, compete on sunday, relax monday and head home
I don't know, I might have to just throw in the towel and be happy with taking the occasional friday off practicing at the range while the kids are at school/daycare.
You could do that provided you don't have a conflicting birthday party or ball game or whatever that same weekend. The thing is, for me at least, if I don't stay practicing at least somewhat regularly, I can't just go out and compete and do any good, even IF (big IF) there isn't something else going on that weekend. If you can set up some kind of regularly scheduled time to practice once every so often then it might be viable. People do that with their kids and matches but I think it's with kids that are a little older than yours and mine are. ( 7 and 2)
The assholes you would go shooting with will not remember you next year. Your kids will remember that you put them first for their entire life. Your not giving something up. Your building solid gold relationships with your kids at the cost of tin plated machismo.
I gave up shooting pistol comps when my kids were born. Started PRS this summer with them at 4 and 7. No time to practice beyond a mid pack finish but I’m having a lot of fun. I reload after anyone’s asleep and leave ~ 4am to head to the range minimizing time away from the family.
Yep stopped in 2017 how do you have 4 kids 5 and under? Dam I have four but they are spread out 2 or more years in between
Easy with twins or triplets....
I got twins and had 4 under 5.... Straight
.I started taking them with me to range to practice about 3-4. Make it a game. They love yelling spotter ready send it Dad. Then saying how come you missed the plate Dad?
Cheap set of binos or spotter for them to play along.
Started the oldest running 223 at 6. He's got some 300prc under his belt.He will be going to his first match with me next month as my squire and brass goblin.
Nothing comes before family and nothing can replace all the memories we already have together shooting.
I'm limited to regional matches within 2 hours, and often take PTO the Friday before to spend extra time with the kids.
I did pretty much your plan in 2022 and it worked decent. I had a match 4 hours away, and booked an Airbnb with my older sister's family too, and my wife was considerably happier when I got back from the match, spent the next day hiking in Zions national Park with my family. Good memories were made.
I do a single national match each year (Hornady PRC) and call it good there. I'm kind of done chasing scores. Shoot to have a good time. Like another guy said, a lot of the dudes we shoot with are a-holes who won't remember us, or will throw a hissy fit when the ro doesn't give them that glance hit or whatever. My kids are a whole lot more fun to be around than 30% of the crowd at prs matches.
Both my kids like shooting, 650 yard range is 10 minutes from my house, 2500 yard range is 30 minutes away.
I can get plenty of practice in, and they get to shoot too.
They don't like school sports. So I have nothing to compete with the time. One of them does pep band, but that's always in the evenings.
I can't put up with the average crowd at an official PRS match. I only shoot the local ones that are fun matches. Taking the camper and camping for the weekend with the family, wife will enjoy some alone time while the 3 of us go to the match. Even though they're not shooting matches, the kids will help out, hangout, and just enjoy seeing all the sights. They do shoot any rimfire matches we go to.
If we're not shooting, we're camping, fishing, riding dirt bikes, etc.
We don't do the birthday parties, soccer, baseball, football, etc. No suburb typical competing with the Joneses here.
I can get plenty of practice in, and they get to shoot too.
They don't like school sports. So I have nothing to compete with the time. One of them does pep band, but that's always in the evenings.
I can't put up with the average crowd at an official PRS match. I only shoot the local ones that are fun matches. Taking the camper and camping for the weekend with the family, wife will enjoy some alone time while the 3 of us go to the match. Even though they're not shooting matches, the kids will help out, hangout, and just enjoy seeing all the sights. They do shoot any rimfire matches we go to.
If we're not shooting, we're camping, fishing, riding dirt bikes, etc.
We don't do the birthday parties, soccer, baseball, football, etc. No suburb typical competing with the Joneses here.
<bowing down>
I wish we had more options locally. My son attended his first Cowboy Action Match at 2 weeks. My wife and I adeptness decisions that we’d split the matches for shooting and child care. I have been Match Director at two clubs for almost 20 years. He enjoys some events, but not the monthly’s.
Keep them involved, but expose then to as many Shooting Sports as possible, and enjoy their response to each.
My son got bored with CAS in his early teens, but still enjoys it at bigger matches. If we had PRS/NRL nearby, he might enjoy it but USPSA May be in his future.
It’s about long term pursuit of excellence. Matches are like final exams that point out the weak areas. Focused efficient practice is the best use of your time. For years I felt, or was made to feel, guilty for not letting my wife run everything but my work. She didn’t seem to be happy with the results either. There is a middle ground between obsessive hobbying and being responsible while continuing your own skill development. It takes solid organization and accountability from both of you though. My solution right now is Rimfire PRS, due to ammo cost savings and lots of suitable ranges close. Cutting out random social busyness, pointless tv/internet/pro sports viewing, and drinking to relax adds a lot more time in the day. I find women are actually often very poor at paying much focused attention to their relationship and mate. Not an easy conversation, but if it is successful, your lives get better. Sorry man, no easy days. Hopefully your wife married you because you are driven, no in spite of.
I needed this thread and didn’t know it - thank you. Daughter just turned 4, son will be 1 next week. Just moved and started a new job, been nooooo time for shooting for a while.
Being a Dad is absolutely awesome, thankfully
OP, hang in there!
Being a Dad is absolutely awesome, thankfully
OP, hang in there!
It's actually easier for me to take a day off and escape during the week compared to the weekend. Practicing or preparing for a match shouldn't be too hard to pull off regularly (once a month or so). I'm also able to reload at night so I think I have the match prep handled...it's just the actual matches I need to worry about and the logistical challenges they bring. Nearest regional matches are about 3-4 hours away from me.
Nice! Good to know it's a viable option. Getting more family into the mix might be a good idea too if I can. I feel like I could do it once or twice but I doubt I'd be able to maintain it to actually compete (3x per year). I might have to settle for one match per year and be happy I'm even able to do that.
Dry fire training. It's cheap, saves ammo, and can be done in your bathroom before you log onto sh.
Being a Dad can be the most noble and important thing that you do in your life. Train them up in all things, and raise them to vote like you. Then, your eyes will be so bad they'll be better shots than you anyway.
Being a Dad can be the most noble and important thing that you do in your life. Train them up in all things, and raise them to vote like you. Then, your eyes will be so bad they'll be better shots than you anyway.
Family first.
Hobbies second.
No regrets.
-Stan
Hobbies second.
No regrets.
-Stan
New stage idea! Try and take out one of those damn windmills with these two monkeys jumping on your back.
Jake Vibbert said, in a podcast, that you have to get right with your family to be successful. Essentially saying that because of the time and money and commitment required for success in competition, your family has to be on board or you won’t be able to perform well. I can make one weekend day work for local comps, borrow that time from the family, practice when the kids are at school, and do fairly well. I tried to go to some two day PRS matches last spring and just can’t take that much time and money to pursue a hobby of my own. Kudos to guys who can do that. I would have to be single, childless, take the family, or maybe I could do it if my job didn’t involve several days of travel every week. Otherwise, I spend the weekend shooting while thinking about being at home. Family over hobby.
The only way I’m able to compete a little is b/c the range that host the matches is only 25 min from house.
They have 4 regional matches and two 2-days.
I’d be shooting a match somewhere every weekend if it weren’t for family obligations.
If the closest range required overnight travel then I’d never even dipped my toe in the PRS waters.
Family is probably one of the main reasons 4yrs is the average time PRS competitors spend in the sport.
They have 4 regional matches and two 2-days.
I’d be shooting a match somewhere every weekend if it weren’t for family obligations.
If the closest range required overnight travel then I’d never even dipped my toe in the PRS waters.
Family is probably one of the main reasons 4yrs is the average time PRS competitors spend in the sport.
I didn't really get into PRS until our kids were a bit older, the youngest was around 6 when I started. My wife was super gracious to let me compete but I was home for almost everything else so the family still got to see a lot of me. Without my wife's support I'd never have been able to do this.
I would bring the kids out shooting, usually one at a time. My middle daughter loved it the most and had a real knack for it. About 3 years ago I brought her to her first match at age 14 and she was all-in. I didn't press her to compete or perform, she just had the drive in herself. It's been an awesome time and completely changed the dynamic since now match trips are time with family rather than just me doing my own thing.
We've been shooting a match or more per month ever since. We have driven thousands of miles together with great opportunities to talk about life and faith and a million other topics. Probably over a dozen nights camping at rifle matches this summer alone. Now we're getting ready to fly to her 2nd PRS finale in Kansas next weekend.
I count myself extremely blessed and I know that it won't be long before she's too cool to hang out with me or she loses interest in shooting, or she just grows up and leaves for college. I'm just enjoying this time that God's blessed me with.
Agree completely with everyone above, family comes first.
I would bring the kids out shooting, usually one at a time. My middle daughter loved it the most and had a real knack for it. About 3 years ago I brought her to her first match at age 14 and she was all-in. I didn't press her to compete or perform, she just had the drive in herself. It's been an awesome time and completely changed the dynamic since now match trips are time with family rather than just me doing my own thing.
We've been shooting a match or more per month ever since. We have driven thousands of miles together with great opportunities to talk about life and faith and a million other topics. Probably over a dozen nights camping at rifle matches this summer alone. Now we're getting ready to fly to her 2nd PRS finale in Kansas next weekend.
I count myself extremely blessed and I know that it won't be long before she's too cool to hang out with me or she loses interest in shooting, or she just grows up and leaves for college. I'm just enjoying this time that God's blessed me with.
Agree completely with everyone above, family comes first.
Family comes first. Read to them each night. Drive them to school. Just spend an hour or two with EACH kid each week doing anything - park, fishing, walking, etc. Make them self-sufficient and get them used to high expectations - laundry, cooking, cleaning their rooms, personal behavior and accountability. Focus on the fundamentals of parenting them. And give your wife time to get a break. The early years can wear her down and resentment towards you can build. Make sure she is taking care of herself. Be accountable to yourself and honor your commitments, large and small. Build in the ability to plan ahead and get things done.
Eventually the kids will become independent. They will dress themselves, cook, clean, be able to work a list of chores. Eventually you and your wife will begin to leave home for longer periods of time. Your time will come and be good if you have your house in order and have a wife that trusts you 100%.
At this stage, you have time to dry fire a few hours a week at home (when kids are asleep ) and go to the range or a match maybe once a month. You can make enormous progress by being focused and using your time wisely and have a realistic daily schedule. You will not shoot well and you will get training scars if you try to push things. Shooting is also expensive. And so are kids.
My kids are older. I have more time. I workout, reload and dry fire 90 minutes every morning before they get up. I go to the range for 2-3 hours once a week. I go to two regional matches each month. The two-days are still not in the cards unless everything comes together. But my kids are older and we have very high expectations for their behavior. I am fortunate my wife is a high level athlete and needs time for herself, too. So we explicitly coordinate schedules and plan 3 months in advance with the kids every other weekend.
My wife was new to shooting when we met. My family is full of former military and we hunt a lot. Guns are everywhere. She agreed to take several pistol and carbine classes when we got engaged so she could handle firearms. She is 100% supportive, but I will and have cancelled a match when she needed me or plans changed.
I take one kid with me to the range. He or she brings a book. I let them drive on the range roads. We talk in the hour there and back. I set up a spotting scope and they can come watch. I have them video me if need be. One kid likes to help reload so she makes some pocket change. She has asked for her own 223 bolt rifle for Christmas. Another likes my piston AR and wants to take a pistol class with me when he turns 16.
Eventually the kids will become independent. They will dress themselves, cook, clean, be able to work a list of chores. Eventually you and your wife will begin to leave home for longer periods of time. Your time will come and be good if you have your house in order and have a wife that trusts you 100%.
At this stage, you have time to dry fire a few hours a week at home (when kids are asleep ) and go to the range or a match maybe once a month. You can make enormous progress by being focused and using your time wisely and have a realistic daily schedule. You will not shoot well and you will get training scars if you try to push things. Shooting is also expensive. And so are kids.
My kids are older. I have more time. I workout, reload and dry fire 90 minutes every morning before they get up. I go to the range for 2-3 hours once a week. I go to two regional matches each month. The two-days are still not in the cards unless everything comes together. But my kids are older and we have very high expectations for their behavior. I am fortunate my wife is a high level athlete and needs time for herself, too. So we explicitly coordinate schedules and plan 3 months in advance with the kids every other weekend.
My wife was new to shooting when we met. My family is full of former military and we hunt a lot. Guns are everywhere. She agreed to take several pistol and carbine classes when we got engaged so she could handle firearms. She is 100% supportive, but I will and have cancelled a match when she needed me or plans changed.
I take one kid with me to the range. He or she brings a book. I let them drive on the range roads. We talk in the hour there and back. I set up a spotting scope and they can come watch. I have them video me if need be. One kid likes to help reload so she makes some pocket change. She has asked for her own 223 bolt rifle for Christmas. Another likes my piston AR and wants to take a pistol class with me when he turns 16.
Guns and competition will wait. Kids grow up fast and there is no going back.
Grab some quick local comps in the meantime. Now I can't even get my kids to go with me. And my son has a worse "problem" acquiring firearms than i do =(
Grab some quick local comps in the meantime. Now I can't even get my kids to go with me. And my son has a worse "problem" acquiring firearms than i do =(
Glad to see so many family first post. Kids make range time and practice non existent but lucky enough to have two great venues within an hour drive that has one day matches here in central AL. Usually home by 3pm to keep the wife happy.
Family definitely comes first. Not always just kids as we grow older also. My mother has Alzheimer's and lives in a different state and it took a lot of time and planning and just plain mental drain getting her set up with aids and also making sure she is happy and I have slowed up my matches. Unfortunately a dickhead at a company I was shooting for and did for 8 years prior and championed all over didn't see this family issue as mattering and the first year of not making enough matches in his opinion dropped me from the team. Fuck him is what I say. I don't regret it at all. Mom comes first.
I agree, family first. I have a 7, 4, and 3 year old now. I work a swing shift at a 5/8's schedule. I get home from work around midnight and reload or tune my guns until 1-2 am while the kids are asleep and it's not as hot as the sun in my garage. Mid summer it too hot to do anything even at 1am in my garage so that's mostly a blackout date for normal reloading. I'll try to do most things in stages inside, and only go out to seat bullets or size brass. I go hit the range once or twice a month early in the morning until 9 to 10 am. I can usually get 2-3 hours in when I go depending on when the sun comes up and how early I wake up to go.
Local match is an hour drive away, so I've been doing 1 to 3 Saturday matches a year when the stars line up with my oldest kids weekend schedules for games and things. I'm looking forward to taking my midgets out shooting with me. I don't think they are quite there yet, but soon my oldest will be ready to go.
Local match is an hour drive away, so I've been doing 1 to 3 Saturday matches a year when the stars line up with my oldest kids weekend schedules for games and things. I'm looking forward to taking my midgets out shooting with me. I don't think they are quite there yet, but soon my oldest will be ready to go.
I am a firearms enthusiast and after we had children I didn’t pull a trigger for seven years.
No regrets.
-Stan
No regrets.
-Stan
I knew a guy that competed as much as he could squeeze in. Several matches per month type of deal. Always wanted to make a day out of it. Even if the match ended around mid-day, he wanted to go out after for drinks. He had a very strong and supportive wife that didn't really need him around to help with the kids, and he didn't really care about losing time with them. I've gone to 3 matches this year and each one landed on one of the rare days that we don't have something planned as a family or something involving my kid's sports. Once they're older and out of the house, that's when I'll get to be serious about shooting competitively, and I'm okay with that.
Since having a family and kids I find myself going back to the old me and banging steel plates out to 1100 on our property more again.
If we had comps more here and did them with a local group more it be awesome. But realistically the nearest ones are 4 hours and being on a team I see it more as a “job” now to do good than I see it as a hobby. Mainly fclass matches
I find just slinging lead with buddy’s on a day off and reloading when I get the opportunity is actually what I prefer anyways. Competition to me has just been more of a money pit and I find myself caring less about beating the competition and more about helping others learn to shoot and seeing the satisfaction when they connect at ranges they didn’t think they could
My kids are 4 and 1.5 years now. I look forward more to them laying on a mat next to me than I every looked forward to attending any match I’ve shot
They do more .22 matches near me now. So I’m looking more into those. Less cost and no time spent reloading which sometimes is more tasking to find the time for then for the actual match itself
If we had comps more here and did them with a local group more it be awesome. But realistically the nearest ones are 4 hours and being on a team I see it more as a “job” now to do good than I see it as a hobby. Mainly fclass matches
I find just slinging lead with buddy’s on a day off and reloading when I get the opportunity is actually what I prefer anyways. Competition to me has just been more of a money pit and I find myself caring less about beating the competition and more about helping others learn to shoot and seeing the satisfaction when they connect at ranges they didn’t think they could
My kids are 4 and 1.5 years now. I look forward more to them laying on a mat next to me than I every looked forward to attending any match I’ve shot
They do more .22 matches near me now. So I’m looking more into those. Less cost and no time spent reloading which sometimes is more tasking to find the time for then for the actual match itself
That's it man, it really is. The 3 comps that I've gone to this year, I've taken my son with me and he just hangs out while we shoot. But that's not fun for him really. Shooting at home, him and my daughters get to interact and ask questions. For the times that they're not with me, it's just relaxing to be by myself and focusing on me. I do miss the group stuff, banter, shit talking, things like that. I show my wife my mediocre groups so she can tell me how much I suck from time to time lol. It keeps me level so I don't make an ass of myself when I do go shoot in public.
ugggggh. I've got nothing like this! I'm on 25 acres, but it's all previously barren cattle pasture. There's no life in it at all (being clear cut and grazed for 100 years will do that) and because of a hill in the middle of my property I can only shoot to around 350yds.
I’d settle for 100 yards. No complaining about your measly 350.
Sounds like you need a good 22. 350 is still a ton of fun there.
If it makes you feel better, I have neighbors that moved in well after I did, built houses in what was once a cow pasture, and now they complain about my shooting. So I get to shoot out to 350yds, but with every trigger pull I have to worry about who I'm pissing off.
Yep. Used to shoot a LOT of multigun comps, haven't shot one since our oldest (almost 5) was born.
Wanted to get into NRL22 but the match near me stopped.
Not competing sucks, but I have to pick and choose carefully when to be gone and what I'll be doing, which is mostly hunting anymore. I do have about 200 yards I can shoot on some property, so have been getting the rimfire out more.
Check all your local ordinances for sound issues.
If there are none, piss them off to the point you're good friends with the sheriff and deputies so they ignore the neighbors.
I'll be dialing back my match shooting to just local and regional matches, now that I have a 1 year old at home. My wife was good enough to let me shoot pro series matches this summer trying to chase the finale.
It's a lot easier to justify being away for a Friday night into Saturday than leaving Thursday and coming home late Sunday or early Monday. It's also easier to bring them along if it's in an area that has something to see/do. Plus the cost is significantly less, with Pro Series matches jumping up over $300 in a lot of cases.
It's a lot easier to justify being away for a Friday night into Saturday than leaving Thursday and coming home late Sunday or early Monday. It's also easier to bring them along if it's in an area that has something to see/do. Plus the cost is significantly less, with Pro Series matches jumping up over $300 in a lot of cases.
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