Family Holiday Drama: Thanksgiving Edition

[sled_mack]

I get it.

My wife and I love to entertain. I don't know what some of our friends would do if we didn't host.

At our place, we focus on the food and cocktails. Formality is unnecessary, except at Christmas.

If you haven't smoked a turkey, you haven't had turkey at its best.

That’s a toss up- I think I lean towards fried turkey.

 

[gopherslayer]

I tell everyone I’m hunting, even if I get my buck. My wife parrots the same thing. I don’t care for her siblings or her extended family very much and she really doesn’t either. Wife and daughter and I will do Turkey and fixings by ourselves on Friday for supper after I’m done hunting. My MIL told my wife she hated her in front of our daughter so that kind of sealed the deal. We usually go to FL for Christmas and don’t deal with the family BS. Both of our families are miserable fucks for some reason.

 

[fanninland]

I just listen to this every Thanksgiving morning and then I’m GTG

 

[Im2bent]

OK ima going to be that guy....smoked turkey< fried turkey.

 

[LuckyDuck]

OK ima going to be that guy....smoked turkey< fried turkey.

I’m a fan of smoked turkey for sure, but I also never had a chance to indulge in fried turkey. I always figured if people are willing to burn their house down every year that it must be pretty damned good though.

-LD

 

[LuckyDuck]

I tell everyone I’m hunting, even if I get my buck. My wife parrots the same thing. I don’t care for her siblings or her extended family very much and she really doesn’t either. Wife and daughter and I will do Turkey and fixings by ourselves on Friday for supper after I’m done hunting. My MIL told my wife she hated her in front of our daughter so that kind of sealed the deal. We usually go to FL for Christmas and don’t deal with the family BS. Both of our families are miserable fucks for some reason.

Classic families & holidays story there. I get it.

 

[Im2bent]

I’m a fan of smoked turkey for sure, but I also never had a chance to indulge in fried turkey. I always figured if people are willing to burn their house down every year that it must be pretty damned good though.

-LD

Only retards burn the house down.

 

[Nik H]

That’s a toss up- I think I lean towards fried turkey.

I like fried turkey but like smoked better. As long as it is cooked properly so it is not dried out which is easier to do than when you are frying it.

 

[Longshot231]

I'm surprised that @Lawless or @SONIC SAAMI hasn't posted anything on adding pineapple to turkey yet.

 

[Im2bent]

I'm surprised that @Lawless or @SONIC SAAMI hasn't posted anything on adding pineapple to turkey yet.

SACRILEGE!!!!!! Desecration of the almighty Thanksgiving turkey should be grounds for banination. Keep that crap in Hawaii.

 

[Nik H]

Pineapple belongs in one place...a Pina Colada.

 

[Lawless]

I'm surprised that @Lawless or @SONIC SAAMI hasn't posted anything on adding pineapple to turkey yet.

I would eat the heck outta that

 

[Longshot231]

SACRILEGE!!!!!! Desecration of the almighty Thanksgiving turkey should be grounds for banination. Keep that crap in Hawaii.

Well what about jalapeños and turkey?

 

[Zoomie]

Couldn’t get home one year. Guy says, have Thanksgiving with us, it’ll be fun. I go reluctantly and keep thinking leftover Chick fil A would have been better. Lo and behold, mid meal his grandpa stands up at the table, drops his trousers and boxers in front of about ten people and exposes Mr Winky. He just stands there, his pickle swinging in the wind. I was ready to perform CPR on one woman, and clear another persons airway when they choked on a yam. After the shock wore off they helped the old guy get dressed. I don’t think anyone spoke the rest of the meal. I’ve declined every invitation since.

 

[Longshot231]

Couldn’t get home one year. Guy says, have Thanksgiving with us, it’ll be fun. I go reluctantly and keep thinking leftover Chick fil A would have been better. Lo and behold, mid meal his grandpa stands up at the table, drops his trousers and boxers in front of about ten people and exposes Mr Winky. He just stands there, his pickle swinging in the wind. I was ready to perform CPR on one woman, and clear another persons airway when they choked on a yam. After the shock wore off they helped the old guy get dressed. I don’t think anyone spoke the rest of the meal. I’ve declined every invitation since.

At least you can't say it was a boring thanksgiving.

 

[gopherslayer]

Couldn’t get home one year. Guy says, have Thanksgiving with us, it’ll be fun. I go reluctantly and keep thinking leftover Chick fil A would have been better. Lo and behold, mid meal his grandpa stands up at the table, drops his trousers and boxers in front of about ten people and exposes Mr Winky. He just stands there, his pickle swinging in the wind. I was ready to perform CPR on one woman, and clear another persons airway when they choked on a yam. After the shock wore off they helped the old guy get dressed. I don’t think anyone spoke the rest of the meal. I’ve declined every invitation since.

Now that’s a party

 

[Zoomie]

At least you can't say it was a boring thanksgiving.

I suddenly made peace with the fact that maybe “boring” isn’t that bad.

 

[Ronws]

Couldn’t get home one year. Guy says, have Thanksgiving with us, it’ll be fun. I go reluctantly and keep thinking leftover Chick fil A would have been better. Lo and behold, mid meal his grandpa stands up at the table, drops his trousers and boxers in front of about ten people and exposes Mr Winky. He just stands there, his pickle swinging in the wind. I was ready to perform CPR on one woman, and clear another persons airway when they choked on a yam. After the shock wore off they helped the old guy get dressed. I don’t think anyone spoke the rest of the meal. I’ve declined every invitation since.

Sounds like a Steve Martin movie.

 

[BAMAboy18]

My ex is bi- polar AF, we used to go to her sister's in Cleveland TN, ahh the memories of watching the joy leaving everyone's face when we arrived...
I was hoping my gf would be out of prison, she's not scheduled until next April, but I finally got through to the right person to get her a medical furlough for another neck surgery (blew out another disc below her fusions, compressing her spinal cord) Maybe before Christmas!

 

[BCP]

Holidays lol

Now that my grandparents and great uncles are all dead it's boomers in charge all they talk about is money and they secretly hate each other so the dinners only last 30-45mins and everybody leaves.

 

[Zoomie]

Sounds like a Steve Martin movie.

I wanted to say, “oh look, it’s The Thanksgiving Penis”, but at that point in my life I was trying to keep the list of people who hate me short.

 

[Ronws]

I wanted to say, “oh look, it’s The Thanksgiving Penis”, but at that point in my life I was trying to keep the list of people who hate me short.

I could hear the Peanuts soundtrack in the background.

 

[BCP]

I could hear the Peanuts soundtrack in the background.

If Peanuts were around today the thanksgiving special would probably look like this:

 

[Makinchips208]

Unfortunately Paul is no longer with us in person. But these videos are fantastic!

In the first minute he explains his reasoning for the “thanksgiving special” video.

Go to the 30 second mark and watch 30 seconds. Or just watch the whole thing.

 

[Ronin22]

Honestly, the best holiday celebrations for me was with the boys in the deployed shitholes. Damn great memories. First holiday after EAS and it was a painful shitshow with the usual family bullshit. That's when I realized I got family that ain't blood, and blood that ain't family.

The sad thing is, when growing up all the guys in the family showed up with their shotguns and we shot trap before and after dinner out in the barnyard. That's when as a young tike I was introduced to the smell of dad's 870 and the burnt powder! All them dudes have since died, most all my side is dead, so I go to my wife's aunt's place. Things are kept light & fun, food is great, but they are of the sheeple variety, no offense, but things get boring AF after dinner and I'm stuffed & miserable waiting for my wife to call RTB. Oh, and no booze ever...

OP, maybe there's something in there to help you indirectly, or really...you're just fucked like the rest of us. LOL

 

[232593]

Question for the Hide on their experiences with aging family members and holiday traditions. We're a week out from Thanksgiving and still haven't a clue on what the proverbial plan is. A lot has changed over the recent years. On my wife's side- her grandmother used to host her side of the family at her house and likely did so for over 60 years. She passed away last year so that familial tradition is now operating in a void this year.

On my side of the family- my Aunt used to host Thanksgiving for us but about 3 years ago health issues stopped her from being able to host and my mother (very apprehensively tried to fill in). Well my Uncle (said Aunt's husband) also passed away last year and my Aunt is in a rehab facility from recently breaking her hip. My own parents are having health issues of their own which complicates them from hosting Thanksgiving this year and now I'm in a situation resembling a Spiderman meme on who's going to catch the hot potato.

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My brother lives in a different state and cannot come up to PA for a turkey dinner. My wife's sister lives in a different state but will be up for Thanksgiving but it seems that both sides of the family are looking at us to pick up the Thanksgiving torch this year. My apprehensions there are that we (1) just purchased the house this year and are still waiting on the furniture we ordered to be delivered and (2) Admittedly I'm very reluctant to enter this holiday as a host because I absolutely believe we'll end up being 'stuck' with it for years to come. To add to the 'joyful' nature of the situation, neither sides of our families necessarily interact with each other either so it's not like it'd be a harmonious joining of families if we did bite the bullet and hosted.

All that said- I'm not looking for any counseling on my family situation here, rather I'm just venting and wondering if anyone else has run into similar family issues with Thanksgiving/Holidays and if so- if they'd be willing to share what the issues were at the time, how they dealt with it, and what the hindsight option was.

Tis the holiday season and it brings out the absolute 'best' in families am I right?

-LD

 

[Nik H]

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Good IPA

 

[BCP]

but they are of the sheeple variety, no offense, but things get boring AF after dinner and I'm stuffed & miserable waiting for my wife to call RTB. Oh, and no booze ever...

Mine are the same way, I have more fun with complete strangers than my family.