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Maggie’s Funny & awesome pics, vids and memes thread (work safe, no nudity)

I WILL be getting one of these.



It’s like we’re brothers

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Probably cost my wife two bucks and she skipped the crap Italian food.

image.jpg
 
I dodnt know who this guy is but this stuff cracked me u[.

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·
The Genius of Steven Wright:
1 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
2 - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.
3 - Half the people you know are below average.
4 - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5 - 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
6 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
7 - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
8 - If you want the rainbow, you got to put up with the rain.
9 - All those who believe in psycho kinesis, raise my hand.
10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
11 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend, ..... But she left me before we met.
12 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?
13 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
14 - If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
15 - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
16 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
17 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
18 - Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
19 - I intend to live forever ... So far, so good.
20 - If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
21 - Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
22 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
23 - My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
24 - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
25 - If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
26 - A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
27 - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
28 - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
29 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
30 - The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
31 - The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
32 - The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
33 - Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.
34 - If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
35 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work.
Great comic.

Passed awhile ago.

Definition of dry humor.
 
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I want the grapple but I haven't been able to justify it...... Just yet,
If you have trees/timber/big brush on your place, a grapple will be the best $ you ever spent.

I have the exact same Kubota and LA525 front end. When hurricane Laura came through here 3 yrs ago it put about 20 of my big red oaks and hickories on the ground and ruined about another dozen. Couldn't walk through the place more than 10yds at a time because of all the trees down.

I did some research and ordered a proper sized grapple from this place along with a 3rd function kit for my hydraulics.

I'm not gonna lie, I was moving and picking up stuff that was at about 110% of what the tractor was rated for but damn!, that was the best money I ever spent. Only having to cut limbs down to 10 or 12 ft instead of small enough to hand carry or throw into the bucket saved an incredible amount of time and 2-cycle gas. Ditto for pushing up the piles and keeping them burning completely.

Can be rigged with a sling easier than when the bucket is on too per below!

20210214_172931.jpg


10/10. Highly recommend.

PS: Stihl chainsaws are the shit.

.
 
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picked up a big reloading estate a few years ago and when we came in to pick the stuff,, the daughter had decided ot help us out and poured all the small boxes and bags of brass into one big box,

sorted it all out, poured it out on a table and worked at it an hour or for a few nights,

8 calibers, from 222 to 30.06
 
picked up a big reloading estate a few years ago and when we came in to pick the stuff,, the daughter had decided ot help us out and poured all the small boxes and bags of brass into one big box,

sorted it all out, poured it out on a table and worked at it an hour or for a few nights,

8 calibers, from 222 to 30.06


Shieet, at least it was not the powder... 😂
 
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Can we please bring back dueling?


Gotta love union thugs. Or maybe not. The last Democrat I voted for was Jimmy Carter. That was only because a union thug, UAW btw, went through the entire plant threatening guys. "YOU WILL" vote for Carter if you want to stay in good standing with the union. I was still young enough to be intimidated. Highest paid guy in the machine shop ran afoul of the union and lost his job because he wouldn't put up with their crap and refused to pay a rather large fine to the local.
 
If you have trees/timber/big brush on your place, a grapple will be the best $ you ever spent.

I have the exact same Kubota and LA525 front end. When hurricane Laura came through here 3 yrs ago it put about 20 of my big red oaks and hickories on the ground and ruined about another dozen. Couldn't walk through the place more than 10yds at a time because of all the trees down.

I did some research and ordered a proper sized grapple from this place along with a 3rd function kit for my hydraulics.

I'm not gonna lie, I was moving and picking up stuff that was at about 110% of what the tractor was rated for but damn!, that was the best money I ever spent. Only having to cut limbs down to 10 or 12 ft instead of small enough to hand carry or throw into the bucket saved an incredible amount of time and 2-cycle gas. Ditto for pushing up the piles and keeping them burning completely.

Can be rigged with a sling easier than when the bucket is on too per below!

View attachment 8272460

10/10. Highly recommend.

PS: Stihl chainsaws are the shit.

.

Agree even with the smaller tractors, I have a BX with its little grapple the thing I bought with it was the grapple. The way my place is setup there are things that are too long that I can pickup but I can't get them to where I need to get. If it is about 4' wider then the tractor I am not going to fit.

This thing even on the little machine is amazing. Back years ago Kubota was doing a 0% finance deal, generally I will pay for toys, but if you offer me free money I am going to take it. That included the stuff you got when you bought it. So the grapple was in there with it. I only wish they had a chipper at the time. I bought a BX25D the year they came out so it has been a while. Currently the little machine has over 400 hours on it and still going strong, original battery as well (I am a big battery tender fanboi).

I know they will vary, but I think the most heavy thing I picked up was 4 RR ties, good ties. Even with the backhoe on it was light on the ass.

When I moved in to the house 24 years ago I bought this:
1700049396996.png


It was a great machine, but as it got old and started having issues it made me never want to own John Deere again. This machine was built for them by Yanmar, and they make a great machine, but JD did not want to claim it saying that was a Yanmar, and Yanmar said it was JD. Finding things for it, simple things like bearings and spindles proved to be a HUGE PAIN int he ass.

When I went looking to replace this machine, I wanted one made by who I bought it from, or at least as much as I could get. Kubota makes everything but the rubber on the BX at the time, so that is what I bought. And I looked at them all.

I actually just used this thing for the first time last night.
1700049646869.png


Worried about buying stuff like this over the internet. This thing is made VERY WELL. At least 1/4 metal, and replaceable cutting surfaces.

It is called a land plane, kind of a one trick pony for driveways, a little like a box blade with the back cut off. It works amazing. My driveway is REAL compacted, I bet about 2.5 hours of back and forth with just the scarrifiers down, then smooth it all out. It is so much better but I want to do a little more to it.

Little BX could not pull it with all the scarifiers down all the way, but will pull them with them halfway down, or two of them all the way. You would be amazed at just how deep gravel gets pushed into the ground.

I did not think of photos or videos till I was about finished, should have done it.

Only picture of the little tractor I could find...I am getting ready to hang a VW transmission from the bucket to power wash it.

1700050308374.png


I am just amazed at how much I use this little machine. I will never be without one with all the goodies on it again.

I need to dig a hole for a concrete base to mount a solar tracking thingy. My OLSD, that would be an Organic Labor Saving Device, also known as my son, blew out his shoulder, and moving bags of quickconcrete will quickly kill me, so it is on the back burner for a while.

Great machine can't reccomend highly enough.
 
What??? Dude can pass off a great joke with a straight face, he had a GREAT and FUNNY as hell 1 hour stand up out there.


I saw him live in Chapel Hill NC in about Feb 1989. Had to drive through a blizzard… at least that is how the Carolina’s treated it. Probably no more than 4”!

Absolutely one of the funniest guys ever!

Deadpan genius…. Just a little smirk…

Sirhr
 

Reminds me of a little bragging about my kid.

Class at school called World Area Studies (actually a decent class with good info) and they were talking about flags and symbols.

Talked about a cross on a church vs not.

Then the teacher asked what the rainbow was a symbol of…..


My 11 yr old didnt even wait to be called on and blurted out “Its a sign to remind us of God’s promise to never flood the world again and has been corrupted by groups not aligned with Bible teachings.”


Teacher couldn't argue.
 
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If you have trees/timber/big brush on your place, a grapple will be the best $ you ever spent.

I have the exact same Kubota and LA525 front end. When hurricane Laura came through here 3 yrs ago it put about 20 of my big red oaks and hickories on the ground and ruined about another dozen. Couldn't walk through the place more than 10yds at a time because of all the trees down.

I did some research and ordered a proper sized grapple from this place along with a 3rd function kit for my hydraulics.

I'm not gonna lie, I was moving and picking up stuff that was at about 110% of what the tractor was rated for but damn!, that was the best money I ever spent. Only having to cut limbs down to 10 or 12 ft instead of small enough to hand carry or throw into the bucket saved an incredible amount of time and 2-cycle gas. Ditto for pushing up the piles and keeping them burning completely.

Can be rigged with a sling easier than when the bucket is on too per below!

View attachment 8272460

10/10. Highly recommend.

PS: Stihl chainsaws are the shit.

.
Only having 4 acres I couldn't justify the $11,000 extra for the competing Kubota model as well that the dealership had to order it and didn't know when it would arrive/months.

Last week I did my 50 hour maintenance service on my Yanmar 235C. It's just crazy all the things I use my tractor for! That's coming from someone who never imagined owning a tractor. Got my road fixed pretty good, on and on and on, but more work to do next year.

One funny thing that happened is I got a darn Jack hammer stuck so hard in a big rock that it took half a day to get it yanked out with my tractor. Hilti SUCKS because it doesn't do (Jack) when pulling it up! It's ok you guys can laugh at me.
20230919_123328.jpg



Ha I thought about getting a grapple just to hold onto logs at waist height then cutting them with my chainsaw for my firewood. Currently the old back gets cricked a bit with all the bendingovering
and pickeruppering along with the resulting ooofouchingering.
Also thought about getting a log splitter but the takeroffering and putteronering might turn into too much of a hassle.

Man I had 4' drifts last winter at one point. One thing is for sure and that is I'm not freezing my ass off anymore or getting snowed in like before.
20230308_105122.jpg
 
Only having 4 acres I couldn't justify the $11,000 extra for the competing Kubota model as well that the dealership had to order it and didn't know when it would arrive/months.

Last week I did my 50 hour maintenance service on my Yanmar 235C. It's just crazy all the things I use my tractor for! That's coming from someone who never imagined owning a tractor. Got my road fixed pretty good, on and on and on, but more work to do next year.

One funny thing that happened is I got a darn Jack hammer stuck so hard in a big rock that it took half a day to get it yanked out with my tractor. Hilti SUCKS because it doesn't do (Jack) when pulling it up! It's ok you guys can laugh at me.
View attachment 8272724


Ha I thought about getting a grapple just to hold onto logs at waist height then cutting them with my chainsaw for my firewood. Currently the old back gets cricked a bit with all the bendingovering
and pickeruppering along with the resulting ooofouchingering.
Also thought about getting a log splitter but the takeroffering and putteronering might turn into too much of a hassle.

Man I had 4' drifts last winter at one point. One thing is for sure and that is I'm not freezing my ass off anymore or getting snowed in like before.
View attachment 8272709


Electric jackhammers do not perform nearly as well as the pneumatic ones. Over here a lot of Chinese store owners do their own construction and refurbishing of newly rented or purchased storefronts and they are always struggling with electric jackhammers. I've used them extensively myself and I go for the air ones for heavy jobs, hands down. These store owners would also then fork up a bit more and rent pneumatic machines complete with the compressor trailers when the electric ones become a source of constant frustration.
 
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@Terry Cross

Husqvarna sucks

There, take that! ….you rapscallion.

6 pro Stihl saws here so kinda biased I admit 😇 (plus a lowly MS250)

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Except for maybe 1 husky. I don't have one.
39cc top handle vs 35cc top handle.

If you're into these posts make sure you go to this thread.
 
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The lotto thing infuriates me. It should be a state law that lotto tickets are a completely separate line.

Try going to the post office in a New England Tourist town... every one of these citified scum-weasels thinks the place is some kind of a Gilmore Girls episode or that somehow it's Mayberry. They want to chat up the postal employees. They want 'local color.' They want to know how to pack maple syrup in a first-class envelope. They actually ask about the Feng Shui of the stamps they are buying (Not making that shit up... seen it more than once.)

No idea that people here actually live and work and try and get through their day... and don't need to be behind Karen Plushbottom who wants to send a Christmas Ornament back to Hoboken in June... and can't figure out how to tape up a package? How the fuck did you get through the first 35 years of life... oh, yeah. Giving head to hedge-fund managers. Better not put on another 10 lbs, though... or you'll violate the cellulite clause in your Prenup and have to give back the Audi. (If they swallow, they get a Mercedes.)

People are totally oblivious to anyone else these days...

Don't even get me started about the bimbos (men included) who leave their BMW or Prius at the one Diesel pump while they go inside and order a 7 course lobster dinner, plan a hostile takeover of GM and earn a masters degree... while the only diesel pump is blocked by their crappy little Audi A3.

Did I mention I hate people more and more these days?

Sirhr
 
Try going to the post office in a New England Tourist town... every one of these citified scum-weasels thinks the place is some kind of a Gilmore Girls episode or that somehow it's Mayberry. They want to chat up the postal employees. They want 'local color.' They want to know how to pack maple syrup in a first-class envelope. They actually ask about the Feng Shui of the stamps they are buying (Not making that shit up... seen it more than once.)

No idea that people here actually live and work and try and get through their day... and don't need to be behind Karen Plushbottom who wants to send a Christmas Ornament back to Hoboken in June... and can't figure out how to tape up a package? How the fuck did you get through the first 35 years of life... oh, yeah. Giving head to hedge-fund managers. Better not put on another 10 lbs, though... or you'll violate the cellulite clause in your Prenup and have to give back the Audi. (If they swallow, they get a Mercedes.)

People are totally oblivious to anyone else these days...

Don't even get me started about the bimbos (men included) who leave their BMW or Prius at the one Diesel pump while they go inside and order a 7 course lobster dinner, plan a hostile takeover of GM and earn a masters degree... while the only diesel pump is blocked by their crappy little Audi A3.

Did I mention I hate people more and more these days?

Sirhr
Yep, same shit around here too. I avoid the post office like the plague. Actually, I tend to avoid the vast majority of society like the plague.