Im joining the military

[The D]

Award for dumbest shit of the day has been cinched for sure.

It’s getting close to dinner time, has this been unseated for dumbest shit of the day yet?

 

[Carlos Danger]

Skip preliminary training? Hell, maybe they'll just zip by everything else and shoot you right into the oval office.

 

[The D]

Op, you have some big shoes to fill. I hope you’re up to the challenge

 

[Docsherm]

Blah blah blah you’re both cunts.

The real issue here is OP sucks dick, now quit fighting and roast op

Ok, you win. There is nothing to say beyond what you just said. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

 

[Threadcutter308]

Blah blah blah you’re both cunts.

The real issue here is OP sucks dick, now quit fighting and roast op

Jeebuz. No shit…..

 

[akmike47]

Op quit because of me...

I told him to troll FB gun groups lol

 

[Darayavaus]

No doubt you'll be putting the "special" in special forces.

 

[DarnYankeeUSMC]

Fixed the tractor, replaced a hundred yards of fence, picked some strawberries and weeded some of the garden.
If I had only known that this gem was going on

 

[lonegunman762x51]

Particularly special forces. I dont know what MOS i want to be but im definitely joining the special forces branch. When I talked to the recruiter he said that I have good qualifications and might even get to skip the preliminary training and go straight to BUD/S.

I was a little worried about sniper school because Idk what kind of optics we are going to be using but I read on quora that a dude in the army said his boy let them put his own personal scope on his rifle so I might get my girl to mail my elcan to me so I can use it on my issued precision rifle when I get there. Hopefully shell be able to send it to me, but she is 6 months pregnant right now and Im supposed to ship out to Paris Island in a week. Idk what ill do if she cant but im sure ill figure it out.

Im super excited about it because hopefully I can come out on full retirement in 4 years. I went with some of my friends that all came to the recruitment office and we got Semper Fi tattoos. My dude thats deployed right now plays ghost recon with me sometimes and he says his post is super lax but his CO is kind of an asshole. He told me about all the people hes killed over in sandland and that shit sounds awesome.

I was hoping you guys could give me some advice before i roll out?
HOO RAH

You sound like a complete fucking idiot. Don't worry I mean that in a good way. Instead of being a sniper or special forces, why not ask to go on delayed enlistment and wait for a General officers or Colonel slot to open up and take one of those? Ask the recruiter about them, they are available for extremely qualified people like you and I just do not understand why you would settle for a lower ranking spot to start your career.

The military needs guys with their own optics and ammo, so it will be nice if you girlfriend mails that stuff to basic so you do not have to wait to put it on your rifle.

Good luck and keep us posted on how it is going from basic and such. This pregnant girl, did you make her pregnant? Lots of guys in the military like pregnant girls and would be happy to help you share the husband duties. I'm sure she could accommodate your squad on weekends or something. Is she a team player??

The military gives bonus promotion points to guys who have a kid that is not genetically similar to them in any way.

 

[TheBigCountry]

@Bender new play thing is here. It hates metal music and emanates a weird light

 

[candyx]

Fixed the tractor, replaced a hundred yards of fence, picked some strawberries and weeded some of the garden.
If I had only known that this gem was going on

You forgot to enable push notifications ?????

 

[Desert Raven]

Hmmmm. Kinda sounds like Paparockcal as a young man, posting to SH for the first time.

 

[Daddyusmaximus]

Sounds like just the kind of people the current regime is looking for...

Go get 'em Nikolay.

 

[TurboTrout]

 

[DIBBS]

 

[Maggot]

Fixed the tractor, replaced a hundred yards of fence, picked some strawberries and weeded some of the garden.
If I had only known that this gem was going on

Youre picking strawberries already? Mine are still just tiny green things, wont be ripe ffor at least two weeks. Mulberries are looking good thoutgh, going to be a big crop..

 

[Maggot]

OP has got to be AmmoJerry come back to fuck with us.

 

[308pirate]

I think that someone as capable as the OP, I say that because of his other incredibly profound and thought provoking threads, should go to the USAF and try out for a combat controller position. Tell them that the Navy is sending you straight to BUDS...they will be rolling out the carpet

 

[308pirate]

 

[Matches Malone]

Brushing my teeth makes me puke sometimes, my girl says there’s no way I could be gay

She’s wrong. You could suck dick with your ass, and like it.

That would make you gay. Especially if you don’t have boot bands on…

 

[akmike47]

She’s wrong. You could suck dick with your ass, and like it.

That would make you gay. Especially if you don’t have boot bands on…

I don’t turn many people down, but usually when I do they look a lot like you and they get turned face down.

 

[akmike47]

Y’all saw where I said OP told me he was kicking rocks right? Y’all have to find his new account when he shows his pretty face again eventually.

 

[n2ishun]

That dude has so many awards from so many countries....must be a real hero huh ?

 

[TXAZ]

HK
92 Golf, that’s your ticket.

The secret passcode is “Did you want fries with that?”

 

[Ravenworks]

About the only thing that you will happen to you is getting ass raped by a Dolphin.
That recruiter should fucking be ashamed of himself.

Good luck Sailor

 

[akmike47]

About the only thing that you will happen to you is getting ass raped by a Dolphin.
That recruiter should fucking be ashamed of himself.

Good luck Sailor
View attachment 7860984View attachment 7860986

He’s winning right now, he’s gone and y’all are still replying to him.

Slow clap.

He’s out there watching with his Cheeto fingers, crusty waifu pillow, and a vibrating butt plug in giggling like a school girl

 

[Bullfrog08]

Seems to be two trolls in this thread......

 

[UKDslayer]

Tell them that the Navy is sending you straight to BUDS...

Will they send him to BUDS with that Semper Fi tat?.

I think that someone as capable as the OP,...they will be rolling out the carpet

Not to mention he has all that experience from Ghost Recon!

 

[JR_77]

He’s winning right now, he’s gone and y’all are still replying to him.

Slow clap.

He’s out there watching with his Cheeto fingers, crusty waifu pillow, and a vibrating butt plug in giggling like a school girl

I’ve been a hide member since 2014 and started lurking here in The Pit the last year or so and I’m beginning to figure out how it works around here. Now I didn’t serve but when OP said “When I talked to the recruiter he said that I have good qualifications and might even get to skip the preliminary training and go straight to BUD/S.” I immediately heard a large cackling of Hyenas going crazy and new this would be a quick, violent, and most certain death no question about it.

 

[Sniperwannabee]

How has @Cowpokey not replied yet, it’s going to be a blast when he does

 

[akmike47]

How has @Cowpokey not replied yet, it’s going to be a blast when he does

Hes probably smart enough to see through It and knows it’s a joke.

 

[akmike47]

I’ve been a hide member since 2014 and started lurking here in The Pit the last year or so and I’m beginning to figure out how it works around here. Now I didn’t serve but when OP said “When I talked to the recruiter he said that I have good qualifications and might even get to skip the preliminary training and go straight to BUD/S.” I immediately heard a large cackling of Hyenas going crazy and new this would be a quick, violent, and most certain death no question about it.

That guy was trying to hard, like I told him subtlety is key he was trying to hard and there’s too many real bad mofos lurking around here. Hence, go hit up FB gun groups and have at it.

 

[JR_77]

That guy was trying to hard, like I told him subtlety is key he was trying to hard and there’s too many real bad mofos lurking around here. Hence, go hit up FB gun groups and have at it.

I completely agree

 

[akmike47]

I completely agree

Who comes out guns blazing full retard mode? He started using mental gymnastics to explain how he’s still winning and just y’all arguing is a win.

Louis, now that was a fucking win multiple years of bull shittery. I’m to the point now I’m just impressed, he deserves a plaque or something lol.

 

[akmike47]

Seems to be two trolls in this thread......

If you mean me, you aren’t very observant. I called him out on two threads to the point he stopped enjoying it.

 

[Snuby642]

Common man

Poor kid is just practicing his lying skills so he can run for president some day.

 

[DarnYankeeUSMC]

 

[Mike Casselton]

Who comes out guns blazing full retard mode? He started using mental gymnastics to explain how he’s still winning and just y’all arguing is a win.

Louis, now that was a fucking win multiple years of bull shittery. I’m to the point now I’m just impressed, he deserves a plaque or something lol.

I've seen his teeth up close. He had lots of plaque.
He shoulda traded it for hair.

 

[Maggot]

View attachment 7861016

Beautiful.

 

[HeavyAssault]

You got a rejection letter from Chatterbate and OnlyFans recently??

 

[Fig]

 

[JR_77]

Something like that.

 

[Darayavaus]

the new Republican party?

 

[JR_77]

the new Republican party?

Looks like Ron Desantis running over a RINO.

 

[Short-bus]

Particularly special forces. I dont know what MOS i want to be but im definitely joining the special forces branch. When I talked to the recruiter he said that I have good qualifications and might even get to skip the preliminary training and go straight to BUD/S.

I was a little worried about sniper school because Idk what kind of optics we are going to be using but I read on quora that a dude in the army said his boy let them put his own personal scope on his rifle so I might get my girl to mail my elcan to me so I can use it on my issued precision rifle when I get there. Hopefully shell be able to send it to me, but she is 6 months pregnant right now and Im supposed to ship out to Paris Island in a week. Idk what ill do if she cant but im sure ill figure it out.

Im super excited about it because hopefully I can come out on full retirement in 4 years. I went with some of my friends that all came to the recruitment office and we got Semper Fi tattoos. My dude thats deployed right now plays ghost recon with me sometimes and he says his post is super lax but his CO is kind of an asshole. He told me about all the people hes killed over in sandland and that shit sounds awesome.

I was hoping you guys could give me some advice before i roll out?
HOO RAH

Full retirement in 4 years.....a real man would retire in 3.

Branden

 

[Cowpokey]

How has @Cowpokey not replied yet, it’s going to be a blast when he does

 

[MarinePMI]

Oh. My. Lord.




I don't even know where to begin...

 

[akmike47]

Oh. My. Lord.




I don't even know where to begin...

Just relax and have a drink, I took care of it for you

 

[Maggot]

Oh. My. Lord.




I don't even know where to begin...

Confucius say:

"The journey of 1000 miles begins with a single step."

 

[philly1010]

ANUSTART is that you?