In Praise Of Lawn Darts

[Steve_In_29]

Before the pussification of America

in praise of lawn darts

the basis for a civilization of free people resides in the skills that children learn from the benign neglect of unsupervised play in an un-nerfed world

boriquagato.substack.com

 

[Maggot]

Before the pussification of America

in praise of lawn darts

the basis for a civilization of free people resides in the skills that children learn from the benign neglect of unsupervised play in an un-nerfed world

boriquagato.substack.com

This.

When I was 8 Id spend the whole day in the woods alone, sometimes riding horses. Late for supper, go to bed hungry.

Today? "Where's my safe space?"

 

[Keeper22]

The good old days of get outside and play.

 

[Emerson0311]

Our choice was mom found us work to do unless we fucked off outside to climb trees, dig holes, and roll boulders.

 

[BullGear]

My mom didn't have to tell me twice. During the Summer months, I'd be up no later than 7:30, go downstairs and eat a bowl of Cheerios or Corn Flakes. Hit the door running at 8am. Run to 1 of a dozen friends' home and start playing. In the woods, at the homemade ball diamond or any number of other things. Play until we heard on of the moms yell that it was dinner time. We'd run in to eat and back outside as fast as we could. We would all gather at one of our houses when it got dark and we'd play there until at 11pm, when one of our parents would yell to come home. It was usually right after the man on the TV would say "It's 11 o'clock, do you know where your children are?" We'd come in and jump in the bath to get off as much dirt as we could. Jump into bed and wake up to do it all over again.

The only day this wouldn't happen was Sunday. We'd all meet up at church. The preacher asked our parents to have the kids sit with the parents. It would seem there was too much under the breath talking and stifled laughing, from our group.

Did I tell you that I had the best childhood anyone could ask for.

 

[K470]

YES! I loved these things as a kid. We would set them up about 40 yards apart and throw them overhand. One stuck in the roof of the porch for a week before my dad saw it and beat our asses. My brother and I wouldn't admit who did it so we both got punished for being the one that threw the dart and for not telling on the other one. Other than the ass woppin's those are some good memories. But the ass woppin's built character that kids today don't have.

 

[sirhrmechanic]

This.

When I was 8 Id spend the whole day in the woods alone, sometimes riding horses. Late for supper, go to bed hungry.

Today? "Where's my safe space?"

Right? And those among us who could not hack it ended up on milk cartons and Unsolved Mysteries, just like Darwin intended!!

Sirhr

 

[hlee]

Lawn darts? I'm not that old, but when I was a kid, I was sent out the door on Saturday morning with a Ruger 10/22 and a brick of ammunition. That was, when there weren't any trees to clear, fences to mend, cattle to feed, hay to haul, etc...

Right? And those among us who could not hack it ended up on milk cartons and Unsolved Mysteries, just like Darwin intended!!

Sirhr

'My mom would send me to the store for a milk. But, I'd get side tracked and it'd take longer than expected. By the time I got to the store for the milk, it was my face on the back of the carton.'- Jeff Foxworthy, paraphrased...

 

[Steve_In_29]

Lawn darts? I'm not that old, but when I was a kid, I was sent out the door on Saturday morning with a Ruger 10/22 and a brick of ammunition. That was, when there weren't any trees to clear, fences to mend, cattle to feed, hay to haul, etc...



'My mom would send me to the store for a milk. But, I'd get side tracked and it'd take longer than expected. By the time I got to the store for the milk, it was my face on the back of the carton.'- Jeff Foxworthy, paraphrased...

Sent to the store for more then just milk. Buying cigs and beer to bring back as well. From the small corner stores (not 7-11 stuff) that were in every neighborhood.

 

[Steve_In_29]

My mom didn't have to tell me twice. During the Summer months, I'd be up no later than 7:30, go downstairs and eat a bowl of Cheerios or Corn Flakes. Hit the door running at 8am. Run to 1 of a dozen friends' home and start playing. In the woods, at the homemade ball diamond or any number of other things. Play until we heard on of the moms yell that it was dinner time. We'd run in to eat and back outside as fast as we could. We would all gather at one of our houses when it got dark and we'd play there until at 11pm, when one of our parents would yell to come home. It was usually right after the man on the TV would say "It's 11 o'clock, do you know where your children are?" We'd come in and jump in the bath to get off as much dirt as we could. Jump into bed and wake up to do it all over again.

The only day this wouldn't happen was Sunday. We'd all meet up at church. The preacher asked our parents to have the kids sit with the parents. It would seem there was too much under the breath talking and stifled laughing, from our group.

Did I tell you that I had the best childhood anyone could ask for.

You aren't alone in that. Though the numbers of us who were fellow participants are getting smaller every year.

 

[Maser]

My generation's lawn darts was just shooting arrows up in the air. Now road darts on the other hand were so much fun once you mastered them. In case you all called them something else, road darts are a straw or pen tube with a .22LR in one end and paper fins on the other. They could be hand thrown or launched from a slingshot or just a rubber band.

 

[n2ishun]

Does anyone else remember "Click Clacks" ?
2 balls about 2 inches in diameter made of some resin or another connected by string that you got going and they would click clack at the top and bottom.
If you got good at it they could really move fast....and then shatter.
Many a law suit brought them to an end at about the same era as lawn darts.
Maybe it was a regional thing....dunno.
These.....

 

[Steve_In_29]

We also had that "Skip It" thing (might have been called something else back then) where the ring with a ball at the end of a couple feet of string went around one ankle and you got it to spinning and jumped other foot over it as you moved around. Not the version with the plastic tube connecting the parts that came later. This one would wrap right around your ankles and dump you on your face like a trussed steer if you screwed up your rhythm.

 

[Alphatreedog]

Neighborhood tackle football . No pads or helmets . Street hockey , whiffle ball , baseball , fishing , bb guns , forts in the woods and digging bmx tracks . Oh and skate boards .
A fair number of my buddies played guitar and drums so we jammed as well . My older Brother played drums and I played guitar before I picked up the bass . We would jam for hours in the rec room .

 

[MtnCreek]

We used to shoot arrows strait up and see how close they'd land to us. I slipped through darwin's fingers.

 

[Cardboard55]

 

[Steel+Killer]

I learned valuable lessons as a kid in the 80s like when you turn on the garden hose that has been sitting out in the sun you better wait until the cool water to come or you were going to get scalded, I learned don't trust Sean Moodys engineering skills to build a bicycle ramp because you were going over the handle bars if you did, I learned that when you shoot out the neighbors porch light with a BB gun there was going to be hell to pay when dad found out, I learned that I hated cutting the grass, but you still have to do stuff you hate, good thing was you didn't need an engineering degree to get the damn gas can open.

 

[TheBigCountry]

Some of us born in the late 80s (it sounds weird saying that) still had it good. Grew up on a farm, and was expected to be there from before sunup till the sun came down. On days we could escape work, we ran around the 30 some acres, building forts, playing paintball in the Christmas trees, and causing all other types of mayhem. Even in the winter, we loved behind out side. No one ever really panicked about where we were; we would show up back home when tired or hungry.

When kids would ask, after summer break, what I did all summer, I would always look at them stupid because they already knew i worked all summer in the fields and running tractors, while they were visiting places like Martha’s Vineyard, the Cape, Disney, etc.

It had its benefits; I could drive a Massey Ferguson and Cub tractor by 10 years old, and I could also drive the 78 Surburban and plow the driveway by 12. Not many kids I knew could that. Plus, when I ran the farm stand to sell our stuff, I was taught how to count change out and handle cash without having to use a calculator.

 

[UNRL Ghandi]

I grew to in the 80s-90s and it was awesome. I feel bad for kids these days because I know my brothers and I would have gotten sucked into all the tech if we grew up now. Because let's face it, if 80s moms could have put us in front of iPads to ignore us they would have, but since they didn't have them they told us to go outside and play. Thank God outside was the best technology available to my mom during my childhood. We did have a Nintendo but Duck Hunt, Mario Bros, Ninja Gaiden, Contra, and Jackal were full on competitions that could end in fights and "Go outside right now!"

 

[UNRL Ghandi]

My favorite made up game was Racket Dodgeball. Six to eight of us would cram into the racketball court on the military base and we'd split into teams with each team getting an even number and a fair distribution of the younger brothers (being about 3 years younger). Then we'd take a racketball and put it in the middle and line up on opposite sides. When someone yelled "go" first person to the ball would grab it and then the game was on. Goal being to hit the ball as hard as you could so that rubber projectile left marks your enemy and if you got one of the little brothers, hopefully they would cry. The rush of getting to send a ball screaming at your friends or brother's back while also potentially dying from them smashing it back at you was intense. The best was when someone jumped and turned to dodge the ball because they didn't want hit in the face or nuts and watching their back bend and them claw at where you just hit them with an 80mph shot from 20 feet away. It was so beautiful.

The most terrifying part of the game was when the ball bounced toward center court and you were sprinting for it only to realize 5 feet from center your brother was going to beat you to it and he had that crazed look in his eye and smile on his face saying, "I'm going to kill you and I'm going to LOVE it." The only choice was to retreat but it was almost always too late unless they got over excited and scrouged the shot. Learned a lot about risk management in that game and also who the cowards of the group were that never rushed center.

I kinda want to play again now that I'm remembering how fun it was. Probably a much different experience in my 40s vs 13-16.

 

[mewillis]

We used to shoot arrows strait up and see how close they'd land to us. I slipped through darwin's fingers.

I did the same thing, from 10-17 there were lots of Darwin moments LOL.......

 

[Tempest 455]

Yep had those as a kid. Brand we had were called "Jarts".

 

[Steve_In_29]

Some of us born in the late 80s (it sounds weird saying that) still had it good. Grew up on a farm, and was expected to be there from before sunup till the sun came down. On days we could escape work, we ran around the 30 some acres, building forts, playing paintball in the Christmas trees, and causing all other types of mayhem. Even in the winter, we loved behind out side. No one ever really panicked about where we were; we would show up back home when tired or hungry.

When kids would ask, after summer break, what I did all summer, I would always look at them stupid because they already knew i worked all summer in the fields and running tractors, while they were visiting places like Martha’s Vineyard, the Cape, Disney, etc.

It had its benefits; I could drive a Massey Ferguson and Cub tractor by 10 years old, and I could also drive the 78 Surburban and plow the driveway by 12. Not many kids I knew could that. Plus, when I ran the farm stand to sell our stuff, I was taught how to count change out and handle cash without having to use a calculator.

Country kids had it good longer then city/suburban ones.

 

[rtB]

There wasn't anything that we wouldn't jump off. No jump too big, no cliff too tall. Bragging rights for the biggest bruise, road rash or noggin bump on monday morning at school.

 

[Steve_In_29]

View attachment 7912108
There wasn't anything that we wouldn't jump off. No jump too big, no cliff too tall. Bragging rights for the biggest bruise, road rash or noggin bump on monday morning at school.

I had one of these.

 

[BullGear]

View attachment 7912108
There wasn't anything that we wouldn't jump off. No jump too big, no cliff too tall. Bragging rights for the biggest bruise, road rash or noggin bump on monday morning at school.

I went off a jump and landed front wheel first. I went over the handlebars and face planted into rocky soil. I busted up my nose, mouth and chin. I looked like I had gone 15 rounds with Mike Tyson. It took all Summer to lose the scabs.

 

[Steve_In_29]

I went off a jump and landed front wheel first. I went over the handlebars and face planted into rocky soil. I busted up my nose, mouth and chin. I looked like I had gone 15 rounds with Mike Tyson. It took all Summer to lose the scabs.

We were coming down a STEEP dirt mountain road on our bikes and I got stuck in a rut I couldn't hop out of. Before I could get stopped my wheel impacted a rock in the rut and stopped me so fast that I endoed and was flung over the handlebars and down the side of the mountain.

I looked pretty rough but still had to ride the miles left to get home. I didn't break any bones and don't remember my parents making a big deal out of it.

 

[rtB]

I didn't break any bones and don't remember my parents making a big deal out of it.

My parents: You wanna go to the Hospital?
Me: Nah I'm fine.
Parents: OK, wash up for dinner.

 

[BullGear]

My parents: You wanna go to the Hospital?
Me: Nah I'm fine.
Parents: OK, wash up for dinner.

Back then, you never went to the hospital unless you broke a bone, were seriously injured or needed an operation. Went to the family doctor for anything else. I can remember getting 12 stiches and having a cyst removed from my wrist in my family doctor's office.

Hospitals were meant for serious things, not life's little problems.

 

[Sean the Nailer]

I had one of those 'motorcycle' type bicycles, with the fake gas-tank but working shocks front and back. Birthday gift when I was 12, iirc. Point being, we were on the front street, going over a ramp, and all the neighbor kids wanted to try it. So it was getting passed around. Was actually fun, because we could just higher and farther than we ever could before, due to the NICE suspension.

Except when it came to my turn again. Perfect luck. The front axle actually sheared (both sides) and the bike STOPPED right there, and I 'end-over'ed' and landed on my head.

(this was WAY back, long before the invention of 'helmets' for bicycles)

Dad took me to the bike shop, the guy had a box of those axles and said "yeah, we've been getting a LOT of those...." (no charge)

 

[spamassassin]

We used to shoot arrows strait up and see how close they'd land to us. I slipped through darwin's fingers.

I thought I was the only one insane enough to do that. I got to where I could pretty reliably reach out and snatch it out of the air before it hit the ground. Zero bloodshed in all the hundreds of times I played that game. A couple times I'd lose the arrow in the sun and then pick a direction and fuck off right out of the vicinity only to have the thing come whooshing down just a few feet from me. I learned it was best to just stay in one spot if you lose the arrow, very low likelihood of it hitting you if you're standing there just asking for it but by trying to actively avoid it, you're not asking for it but begging for it on bended knee.

 

[Steve_In_29]

Back then, you never went to the hospital unless you broke a bone, were seriously injured or needed an operation. Went to the family doctor for anything else. I can remember getting 12 stiches and having a cyst removed from my wrist in my family doctor's office.

Hospitals were meant for serious things, not life's little problems.

It helped that my mom was a nurse.

 

[babyguppy]

Lawn Darts.. all fun and games until one of the kids, toss one or two straight up in the air, INTO the sun. They will go through a shoe, I've heard stories of skull penetration.
Fk'ing hate playing with lawn darts around stupid people. You learn who has a self-chosen shortened life span playing lawn darts.

 

[hino895]

You guys growing up in the 80-90s had it made.
Some of us grew up in the 60-70s, now that was the good old days.
My brother and I and our friends are probably lucky to be alive.
You haven’t lived till you made a raft out of logs and waited till spring for the rains to come and the creek to flood.
Or have a cool uncle teach you how to make a sling out of a couple shoe laces and the tongue (almost turned my brother into a cyclops).
Or “borrow” shotgun shells out of cop cars at the county repair yard and make pipe bombs.
My little brother blew the side of the shed out with one, pop was really made as in your gonna die mad.
The 70s were fun.

 

[n2ishun]

Paintball is for whimps.
Me, my stepbros, and a few buddies would put on our heaviest jackets, grab the wrist rocket sling shots and go down to the local orange orchard.
A green orange about 1 1/2 inches in diameter give or take shot full force at you with a wrist rocket will lay you flat out.
Big ass welts and heavy bruising were common.
Until one day Penhall concrete cutting bought the orange orchard.
Bruce Penhall was about our age back then and would ride his little XR75 bike up and down right behind the remains of the orchard.
I guarantee if asked he will remember us wailing the shit out of him with those oranges.
Yea, Bruce Penhall the flat track bike rider.....and on the TV show Chips.
Helluva flat tracker.....I'd like to think we helped with that hard to dodge a 70mph orange

 

[EddieNFL]

My mom didn't have to tell me twice. During the Summer months, I'd be up no later than 7:30, go downstairs and eat a bowl of Cheerios or Corn Flakes. Hit the door running at 8am. Run to 1 of a dozen friends' home and start playing. In the woods, at the homemade ball diamond or any number of other things. Play until we heard on of the moms yell that it was dinner time. We'd run in to eat and back outside as fast as we could. We would all gather at one of our houses when it got dark and we'd play there until at 11pm, when one of our parents would yell to come home. It was usually right after the man on the TV would say "It's 11 o'clock, do you know where your children are?" We'd come in and jump in the bath to get off as much dirt as we could. Jump into bed and wake up to do it all over again.

The only day this wouldn't happen was Sunday. We'd all meet up at church. The preacher asked our parents to have the kids sit with the parents. It would seem there was too much under the breath talking and stifled laughing, from our group.

Did I tell you that I had the best childhood anyone could ask for.

I think I grew up in that neighborhood...1956 - 1968. Then we moved to the country. That was even better.

 

[Eddystone]

Good stuff, and I thought it was a F-16 thread.

 

[Flint62a1]

My mom didn't have to tell me twice. During the Summer months, I'd be up no later than 7:30, go downstairs and eat a bowl of Cheerios or Corn Flakes. Hit the door running at 8am. Run to 1 of a dozen friends' home and start playing. In the woods, at the homemade ball diamond or any number of other things. Play until we heard on of the moms yell that it was dinner time. We'd run in to eat and back outside as fast as we could. We would all gather at one of our houses when it got dark and we'd play there until at 11pm, when one of our parents would yell to come home. It was usually right after the man on the TV would say "It's 11 o'clock, do you know where your children are?" We'd come in and jump in the bath to get off as much dirt as we could. Jump into bed and wake up to do it all over again.

The only day this wouldn't happen was Sunday. We'd all meet up at church. The preacher asked our parents to have the kids sit with the parents. It would seem there was too much under the breath talking and stifled laughing, from our group.

Did I tell you that I had the best childhood anyone could ask for.

You just described my childhood completely. Building dams in the creek behind the house, blowing up frogs with M-80's, it seemed like every day, I was told to take off my clothes at the back door and get directly in the tub! What a blast we had! Except Sundays, Dad was a devout Catholic, it was 915 mass or heads would roll. Sit with my friends? Not in this lifetime. The only time he ever drove fast was when we would be late for church(usually my fault).
Thanks, Bullgear, you brought back alot of great memories

 

[Baron23]

I was born in '52 so in the 70's I was chasing broads in the disco and not playing with lawn darts! haha But, I absolutely can relate.

We had a Tarzan swing in the woods behind our neighborhood. Just a rope, and old tire, and a big ass hill to swing out over. Don't remember ever having a safety check of the swing! haha

And while not lawn darts, we had these little plastic rocket ship thingies that you would put a cap in (remember cap guns, anyone), throw them up in the air and stare at it as it came down on our damn foreheads.

And on and on.....

Loved the one of the two ponces with masks on an electric scooter. Shit, we wouldn't even ride bitch if our bikes broke down. LOL

 

[Lightning8]

Wrist rocket slingshots and acorns for neighborhood battles. One of my knuckles still hurts where I got hit. Great thread.

 

[Harleystoo]

Shot arrows into the air, and tried to grab them as they fell back to Earth.
BB gun wars. Almost lost an eye in that enterprise.
Maybe this is why we have young males shooting up schools; never had to take responsibility for their actions.

 

[Northfl]

Had lawn darts, shot arrows up in the air as well, bb gun wars.,
Riding our bikes up to town ( bout 10miles away), building forts, digging holes, making tunnel forts( big hole in the ground and covered up. Only way in or out was through a tunnel). We would play hide and seek on our bikes. Whole neighborhood was the boundary.jumping ramps on our bikes. We fucked up all of our sprockets and pedals. But we had extras and would beat the sprockets back flat and hang them on a nail and change them out out for another beat flat one. Sand lot football and baseball. Spent my 13th bday in a tobacco field in ga. Making 20.00 a day. Man was i rich! If we weren’t in the field, we were fishing the many farm ponds around. Man did we ever catch a bunch of bass from them.
Camped out in the forts almost every weekend.
We had a big swamp not too far and built a raft and built us a fort in the trees in the middle of it. How or where we ever found the lumber and nails and shit i still cant figure out
Man them was the good ol days for sure

 

[EddieNFL]

Age five or six I walked to the nearest store (maybe a mile) and asked the owner for candy. He called my mom and I got a switching when I got home...because I asked for free candy.

 

[Schütze]

Fancy toys like Lawn darts? We were throwing bricks, I grew up in a brick factory. I remember building toy “guns” from 1x2’s with rubber bands from canning glasses and cloth pins as trigger, double barrel of course.

 

[Tempest 455]

I went off a jump and landed front wheel first. I went over the handlebars and face planted into rocky soil. I busted up my nose, mouth and chin. I looked like I had gone 15 rounds with Mike Tyson. It took all Summer to lose the scabs.

Mid 1970's as a kid I would put the family dog on a leash, get on my skateboard and throw his tennis ball to fetch. Was a blast until I hit a stone and flew off the skate board at the speed of light onto my face.

Same result.

 

[Bluedog82]

I was born in 94 but I related to a lot of this and definitely had some good memories. I grew up on a dead-end street in a small town, and my friends from the neighborhood and I would go outside and play all day long in the summer. Street hockey, tackle football, kickball, baseball, basketball, tag, whatever made up games we came up with, you name it. In the winter we would build huge snow forts and tunnels in the snow pile that the plows would make at the dead end. Good times, I had about as good of a childhood as anyone could ask for.

I moved out to the county now and I hope to be able to give my kids a similarly good (albeit different) childhood. I have 11 acres of woods and swamp for them to play on and also have a set of lawn darts for them to use! Hopefully one day they too will look fondly back on the good-old days.