Sleeper cell

[The D]

Haha, got ya! It’s not what you think, I promise.

My wife is growing another dissident and he or she(won’t know the sex for a few more weeks) will be here sometime in July. All old wives tales about the babies sex points to a girl. And this means(potentially) I need to get my sons into some jiu jitsu classes so they can beat the hell out of any little boys that come around looking to start trouble. Or if it’s another boy, I’ll just have all of them start watching The Three Stooges re-runs

We’ve known since thanksgiving when she took a pregnancy test but it wasn’t really official until a few weeks later when she covertly borrowed her office’s ultrasound tech to take a peek. I can’t believe this will be my 3rd kid, plus a stepdaughter that we split time with. I always envisioned having one, mayyybe two then getting fixed. I definitely can’t wait but am also not ready at all, all of the emotions... The world is a funny place sometimes

 

[SamsonSimpson]

Congrats on the news! Here’s to a safe pregnancy and birth my friend!

 

[zeroz]

You know how this happens right? Get fixed.

 

[mrdrar]

Congrats

 

[winniedonkey]

There are other holes to finish in!!!!.... congrats bud!!!!! Wish you a super healthy/happy family.

 

[The D]

Thanks everyone. I will be getting snipped after this one, even if I have to sharpen my wood marking knife and do it myself. Now if you all will excuse me, I need to stay up as long as possible and train myself to be somewhat functional in a heavily sleep deprived state

 

[OldSalty2]

Congrats D.

 

[Bender]

Awesome D!! Another dissident for the cause!! Congratulations man!

 

[kmckinnon]

Congrats. I've been an empty nester for years... and fixed years before that!

 

[vh20]

Awesome news, and congratulations! Prayers for everyone.

 

[jymbeux]

Congratulations!

 

[zeroz]

You gotta time the snip properly; tactical snip. You have a window now that you can spray like an uncut dog and not worry about it. That said, if you wait to long and she's too far along you won't be able to milk the benefits that should come with the snip. If you wait too long after your new little bundle of joy pops out you could end up in this boat again. I'd say sometime in the next couple months would be best. That way you can get lots of sympathy bj's while she's still horny and not miserable. Then, by the time the new one arrives you'll be out of the danger zone and it'll be worry free spraying. Remember, the doctor said loooots of BJ's is the best thing to move it along.

 

[Doing my part]

Congratulations sir

 

[HeavyAssault]

Congrats!! BTW doing it doggie style with the lights on during a full moon does not guarantee it will be a girl.

 

[powdahound76]

Yeah, do it before your next blessing exits the cave.
you wont be able to afford the downtime after...

and congrats. once I had one, I wanted 3.
i have one and being a dad is a ton of fun. Mine turns 9 in 6 weeks.....

 

[wconn1979]

Congratulations, I too am expecting my 3rd child. My wife and I have 2 teen age daughters, and now a boy has decided to make an appearance. I am 41 and thought we were done with this! I do not look forward to diapers again.

 

[Josh1978]

Congrats. Before my 3rd son was born, I went to the dr and got fixed. God blessed us with all boys. I wanted a little girl but it wasn’t meant to be. Best wishes and prayers for your wife and new addition (in July)

 

[skinney_7]

Awesome D!! Another dissident for the cause!! Congratulations man!

Exactly, don't get fixed we need as many well informed, disciplined youngsters as we can be blessed with.

 

[The D]

You gotta time the snip properly; tactical snip. You have a window now that you can spray like an uncut dog and not worry about it. That said, if you wait to long and she's too far along you won't be able to milk the benefits that should come with the snip. If you wait too long after your new little bundle of joy pops out you could end up in this boat again. I'd say sometime in the next couple months would be best. That way you can get lots of sympathy bj's while she's still horny and not miserable. Then, by the time the new one arrives you'll be out of the danger zone and it'll be worry free spraying. Remember, the doctor said loooots of BJ's is the best thing to move it along.

Not sure when it will be, actually. But I’m pretty sure we can be careful enough until it happens. Definitely leveraging my sore daddy parts for a few blow j’s.

Congrats!! BTW doing it doggie style with the lights on during a full moon does not guarantee it will be a girl.

No, but it does increase the odds. High heart rate and a very sick mom are the two we got going for us

 

[wh20crazy]

if it’s another boy, I’ll just have all of them start watching The Three Stooges re-runs

THIS.

Congrats!

 

[hollowoutadime]

Kids are the best. Nothing better.

 

[The D]

Kids are the best. Nothing better.

Definitely. Depending on the situation...

 

[The D]

Just found out we’re having another boy, apparently I don’t make female producing sperm

 

[Josh1978]

Me either. Lol Congratulations!!

 

[sirhrmechanic]

Just found out we’re having another boy, apparently I don’t make female producing sperm

Well, that's an excuse to buy him his first rifle! And pistol. And cool knife. And watch.

Congrats and may all go great!

Sirhr

 

[DIBBS]

Currently have 2 granddaughters, and I understand if things go well, will have a grandson in approximately 3 months. My Daughter in law is having a few issues with the pregnancy... but we are hoping/praying for a gentle coast to the finish line.

 

[The D]

I already have plans for all of the boy things for them. They will all get 80% 10/22’s to finish at some point. Then obviously they need their own AR’s of different flavors. Getting them knives will be a perfect excuse for me to build my own mini forge to make knives. And on and on and on...

 

[308Gunner]

Congratulations, prayers for an easy pregnancy

 

[The D]

Saying this is going to haunt me forever I’m sure, but.

I love having boys. We’re visiting my in-laws in Florida for my older son’s birthday. We were out for dinner when my younger son, who was standing on his seat next to grandma, pulled his pants down and said, “look at this!” This is a co-hiv hysteria silver lining because there wasn’t anyone near us to see him do this. But that may have made it funnier, I dunno.

 

[powdahound76]

That is AWESOME!!
and totally sounds like something I would have done at age 22 or so.....

 

[zeroz]

You know what they say. Have a son you have one boys dick to worry about. Have a daughter, you have to worry about all the boys dicks.

One dick is plenty to worry about, trust me. (3 in your case)

Speaking of worrying about dicks, you get that snip scheduled yet?

 

[The D]

You know what they say. Have a son you have one boys dick to worry about. Have a daughter, you have to worry about all the boys dicks.

One dick is plenty to worry about, trust me. (3 in your case)

Speaking of worrying about dicks, you get that snip scheduled yet?

Not yet, I’ll probably just do it at work...

 

[Porksboy]

Mine turns 16 in August. Better kid than we deserve. at 54 and 52 the ship has sailed for another.

 

[The D]

Mine turns 16 in August. Better kid than we deserve. at 54 and 52 the ship has sailed for another.

Start formulating plans to spoil any grandkids that come along.

 

[The D]

Time to revive the sleeper cell. The new one has been really small the entire pregnancy, like 9.9th percentile. But all the measurements and vitals have been strong, he’s just small. My wife had a checkup this morning and his growth has slowed even more so she’s being induced tomorrow. Hopefully because he’s so small, he’ll just plop right out. Today was her official full term date so he’s not going to be in any premature birth danger. Now I get to scramble around trying to figure out a bunch of work and other kid logistics.

 

[The D]

Holy fuck, waiting in the hospital is boring.

Because she’s being induced early, and my wife wants as little intervention as possible, this process is proceeding glacially. We’ve been here since 8am with just minimal meds, some time in the bathtub, & lots of walking the halls.

 

[Alphatreedog]

Just saw this . Prayers sent .

 

[308Gunner]

My oldest waited 27 hours, hospitals suck when your wife is in labor. Prayers and best wishes for your new son and your wife.

 

[The D]

Man, what a night. The only thing that went according to plan was ending up with a healthy mom & baby

After the walking, mild meds, & bathtub the contractions finally started to mean something. It was after about 4hrs of decent contractions that the Dr checked my wife again and had the baby shake her finger with his hand…interesting… She tried a few times to shove his hand back inside but couldn’t get it.

Dr was worried about permanent damage done to his hand so she suggested a c-section which was our absolute last resort. Everything was normal, nothing abnormal happened according to the Dr. I don’t know if anyone has ever seen a kid fresh out of a uterus via c-section but it’s freaky. Think of a very blue, tiny alien.

We also found the reason our little alien couldn’t squeeze out even though he only weighs 5lb 4oz. There was a fibroid in my wife’s uterus that was very small several months ago but had grown to the size of baby’s head and he couldn’t wriggle past it.

So all is normal except my wife being gutted temporarily and can’t feel anything below her stomach for a while. Our blue alien finally looks like a human larvae like he should. Both my wife and I are zombies and are looking forward to an hour or so of sleep before nurse change and baby wakes up again. Hopefully I don’t snore loud enough to wake up everyone on the floor

 

[powdahound76]

Yay for a healthy little guy!!!

Mine was a tiny stinker too.
And yeah, they do look a bit funny not getting "all jazzed up" by fighting their way out. They pink up pretty quick though.

Best to mom and baby. and of course you, but you are in distant 3rd right now.....

Continued that all is well for all of you.

 

[DeadAss]

congratulations, glad all are doing well

 

[hollowoutadime]

Congrats!

 

[deersniper]

Buy more ammo
Have more kids

Congrats

 

[DarnYankeeUSMC]

In today's economy neither of them are inexpensive.
Don't be a poor!!

Buy more ammo
Have more kids

Congrats

 

[deersniper]

In today's economy neither of them are inexpensive.
Don't be a poor!!

You got it alll backwards.

if your a scumbag poor, the tax payer gets to pay for your kids plus their own.



And it would boggle your mind how many people you see with jobs and think they are good upstanding citizens that are recieving a great big pile of your tax money to pay for their rats

 

[DarnYankeeUSMC]

Ohh I know. It's fucked up how many people get a "tax return" and didn't pay anything in.

You got it alll backwards.

if your a scumbag poor, the tax payer gets to pay for your kids plus their own.



And it would boggle your mind how many people you see with jobs and think they are good upstanding citizens that are recieving a great big pile of your tax money to pay for their rats

 

[clcustom1911]

Haha, got ya! It’s not what you think, I promise.

My wife is growing another dissident and he or she(won’t know the sex for a few more weeks) will be here sometime in July. All old wives tales about the babies sex points to a girl. And this means(potentially) I need to get my sons into some jiu jitsu classes so they can beat the hell out of any little boys that come around looking to start trouble. Or if it’s another boy, I’ll just have all of them start watching The Three Stooges re-runs

We’ve known since thanksgiving when she took a pregnancy test but it wasn’t really official until a few weeks later when she covertly borrowed her office’s ultrasound tech to take a peek. I can’t believe this will be my 3rd kid, plus a stepdaughter that we split time with. I always envisioned having one, mayyybe two then getting fixed. I definitely can’t wait but am also not ready at all, all of the emotions... The world is a funny place sometimes

It's a beautiful thing, congratulations!

 

[deersniper]

Ohh I know. It's fucked up how many people get a "tax return" and didn't pay anything in.

No I’m talking about professional scumbags. Have the mans address listed somewhere else while the sow gets full food stamps utilities rent etc

 

[PinesAndProjectiles]

Congratulations!

 

[TexPatriot]

I already have plans for all of the boy things for them. They will all get 80% 10/22’s to finish at some point. Then obviously they need their own AR’s of different flavors. Getting them knives will be a perfect excuse for me to build my own mini forge to make knives. And on and on and on...

Basics: Judo, boxing (ducking, slipping, blocking, counter punching), shooting real guns, ie. accurate pellet guns, .22 by age 12.

History and the sacrifices made in wars to make America great.

The Constitution and Americans Inalienable Rights.

Honesty and the self respect that comes with it.