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      "thread_prefix.9" => "Training Courses"
      "widget_def.XP_xpress_recent_posts_3" => "XPress: thxpress_widget_recent_posts"
      "widget_def.adav_level_progress" => "[Audentio] Achievements: Progress to next level"
      "widget_def.adav_recent_achievements" => "[Audentio] Achievements: Recently Earned Achievements"
      "widget_def.adav_tracked_achievements" => "[Audentio] Achievements: Tracked Achievements"
      "widget_def.adca_account_completion" => "[Audentio] Account Completion"
      "widget_def.adlb_leaderboard" => "[Audentio] Leaderboards: Leaderboard"
      "widget_def.birthdays" => "Today's birthdays"
      "widget_def.find_member" => "Find member"
      "widget_def.forum_statistics" => "Forum statistics"
      "widget_def.html" => "HTML"
      "widget_def.member_stat" => "Member stat"
      "widget_def.members_online" => "Members online"
      "widget_def.new_posts" => "New posts"
      "widget_def.new_profile_posts" => "New profile posts"
      "widget_def.new_threads" => "New threads"
      "widget_def.newest_members" => "Newest members"
      "widget_def.nf_calendar_featured_even" => "Calendar: Featured events"
      "widget_def.nf_calendar_upcoming_evnt" => "Calendar: Upcoming events"
      "widget_def.online_statistics" => "Online statistics"
      "widget_def.php_callback" => "PHP callback"
      "widget_def.search_forum" => "Search forum"
      "widget_def.share_page" => "Share this page"
      "widget_def.template_syntax" => "Template syntax"
      "widget_def.th_post_thread_uix" => "[UI.X] Start a thread"
      "widget_def.th_reactplus_top_content" => "[TH] Reactions Plus: Top content"
      "widget_def.th_widget_login_uix" => "[UI.X] Login form"
      "widget_def.thdonate_campaign" => "[TH] Donate: Campaign"
      "widget_def.thdonate_earnings" => "[TH] Donate: Earnings"
      "widget_def.thdonate_goals" => "[TH] Donate: Goals"
      "widget_def.thdonate_topDonations" => "[TH] Donate: Top donations"
      "widget_def.thdonate_topDonors" => "[TH] Donate: Top donors"
      "widget_def.thfeature_full" => "[TH] Featured Threads and Content: Full"
      "widget_def.thfeature_full_thread" => "[TH] Featured Threads and Content: Full Threads"
      "widget_def.thfeature_grid" => "[TH] Featured Threads and Content: Grid"
      "widget_def.thfeature_grid_threads" => "[TH] Featured Threads and Content: Grid Threads"
      "widget_def.thfeature_slider" => "[TH] Featured Threads and Content: Slider"
      "widget_def.thfeature_slider_threads" => "[TH] Featured Threads and Content: Slider Threads"
      "widget_def.thfilters_filters" => "[TH] Filters"
      "widget_def.threactplus_userReactList" => "[TH] Reactions Plus: Member reaction list"
      "widget_def.thread_poll" => "Thread poll"
      "widget_def.thtrending" => "[TH] Trending"
      "widget_def.thuix_socialMedia" => "[TH] UI.X social media feed"
      "widget_def.thxpress_latest_articles" => "[TH] XPress: Latest Articles"
      "widget_def.visitor_panel" => "Visitor panel"
      "widget_def.xcfs_latest_feedback" => "XCFS: Latest Feedback"
      "widget_def.xcfs_top_traders" => "XCFS: Top Traders"
      "widget_def.xcfs_untrusted_traders" => "XCFS: Untrusted Traders"
      "widget_def.xfes_similar_threads" => "XFES: Similar threads"
      "widget_def.xfmg_albums_slider" => "XFMG: Albums slider"
      "widget_def.xfmg_gallery_statistics" => "XFMG: Gallery statistics"
      "widget_def.xfmg_latest_comments" => "XFMG: Latest comments"
      "widget_def.xfmg_media_slider" => "XFMG: Media slider"
      "widget_def.xfrm_featured_resources" => "XFRM: Featured resources"
      "widget_def.xfrm_latest_reviews" => "XFRM: Latest reviews"
      "widget_def.xfrm_new_resources" => "XFRM: New resources"
      "widget_def.xfrm_top_resources" => "XFRM: Top resources"
      "widget.Complete_Account" => "Complete Your Account"
      "widget.advertisement" => "Advertisement"
      "widget.app_download_canvas" => "App download"
      "widget.become_a_member" => "Upgrade Your Account"
      "widget.canvas_menu" => "Canvas Menu"
      "widget.canvas_menu_social" => "Canvas menu social"
      "widget.donation" => "Help Cover Community Costs!"
      "widget.forum_overview_forum_statistics" => ""
      "widget.forum_overview_members_online" => ""
      "widget.forum_overview_new_posts" => ""
      "widget.forum_overview_new_profile_posts" => ""
      "widget.forum_overview_share_page" => ""
      "widget.latest_followed_profile_posts" => "Latest profile posts by followers"
      "widget.latest_posts" => "Latest posts"
      "widget.latest_profile_posts" => "Latest profile posts"
      "widget.latest_watched" => "Latest watched"
      "widget.leaderboards" => "Leaderboard: Posts"
      "widget.member_wrapper_find_member" => ""
      "widget.member_wrapper_newest_members" => ""
      "widget.nf_calendar_list_featured_events" => ""
      "widget.online_list_online_statistics" => ""
      "widget.sh_forumStats" => "Forum Statistics"
      "widget.sh_homeTrending" => "Trending Threads"
      "widget.sh_mediaSlider" => "Latest Media"
      "widget.sh_subscribe" => "Subscribe"
      "widget.thdonate_earnings" => ""
      "widget.thdonate_goals" => ""
      "widget.thdonate_topDonations" => ""
      "widget.thdonate_topDonors" => ""
      "widget.thuix_footer_aboutUsWidget" => "About us"
      "widget.uix_footer_forumStatistics" => ""
      "widget.uix_footer_newPosts" => ""
      "widget.uix_footer_onlineStatistics" => ""
      "widget.uix_footer_sharePage" => ""
      "widget.uix_sidebar_postNewThread" => "Can't find a topic?"
      "widget.unread_posts" => "Unread posts"
      "widget.whats_new_new_posts" => ""
      "widget.whats_new_new_profile_posts" => ""
      "widget.xfes_thread_view_below_quick_reply_similar_threads" => ""
      "widget.xfrm_forum_overview_new_resources" => ""
      "widget.xfrm_list_featured_resources" => ""
      "widget.xfrm_list_top_resources" => ""
      "widget.xfrm_overview_latest_reviews" => ""
      "widget.xfrm_overview_top_authors" => ""
      "widget.xfrm_whats_new_overview_new_resources" => ""
      "reactions.1_person" => "1 person"
      "reactions.deleted_user" => "(deleted member)"
      "reactions.threactplus_one_user" => "1 user"
      "reactions.threactplus_x_users" => "{count} users"
      "reactions.threactplus_you_and_x_others" => "You and {count} others"
      "reactions.user1" => "{user1}"
      "reactions.user1_and_user2" => "{user1} and {user2}"
      "reactions.user1_user2_and_user3" => "{user1}, {user2} and {user3}"
      "reactions.user1_user2_user3_and_1_other" => "{user1}, {user2}, {user3} and 1 other person"
      "reactions.user1_user2_user3_and_x_others" => "{user1}, {user2}, {user3} and {others} others"
      "reactions.x_people" => "{reactions} people"
      "reactions.you" => "You"
      "reactions.you_and_user1" => "You and {user1}"
      "reactions.you_user1_and_user2" => "You, {user1} and {user2}"
      "reactions.you_user1_user2_and_1_other" => "You, {user1}, {user2} and 1 other person"
      "reactions.you_user1_user2_and_x_others" => "You, {user1}, {user2} and {others} others"
      "reaction_title.1" => "Like"
      "reaction_title.2" => "Love"
      "reaction_title.3" => "Haha"
      "reaction_title.4" => "Wow"
      "reaction_title.5" => "Sad"
      "reaction_title.6" => "Angry"
      "trophy_title.1" => "First Real Post"
      "trophy_title.10" => "Old School Sniper's Hide"
      "trophy_title.11" => "Posts (Silent)"
      "trophy_title.12" => "Logging In (Silent)"
      "trophy_title.13" => "Post Media Items (Silent)"
      "trophy_title.136" => "Test Achievement 4"
      "trophy_title.14" => "Spotted"
      "trophy_title.15" => "Rifle Cleaner"
      "trophy_title.16" => "Completed Profile"
      "trophy_title.17" => "Gunsmith"
      "trophy_title.19" => "Community Contributor"
      "trophy_title.2" => "Just getting into Precision Rifle."
      "trophy_title.20" => "Marksman!"
      "trophy_title.22" => "Made America Great Again"
      "trophy_title.23" => "Professor"
      "trophy_title.25" => "Leaderboard Legend"
      "trophy_title.26" => "Commercial Sales Member"
      "trophy_title.27" => "Supporter"
      "trophy_title.3" => "Look Everyone I can Sell Now !"
      "trophy_title.4" => "Hide Addict !"
      "trophy_title.5" => "Members are Noticing"
      "trophy_title.6" => "Hide Rockstar, Lady Gaga Approved!"
      "trophy_title.7" => "They like me, they really like me!"
      "trophy_title.8" => "I want to have Lowlight's Love Child"
      "trophy_title.9" => "I LOVE IT LONG TIME"
      "a_moment_ago" => "A moment ago"
      "actions" => "Actions"
      "approve" => "Approve"
      "continue_reading" => "Continue reading..."
      "conversations" => "Conversations"
      "date_x_at_time_y" => "{date} at {time}"
      "day_friday" => "Friday"
      "day_friday_short" => "Fri"
      "day_monday" => "Monday"
      "day_monday_short" => "Mon"
      "day_saturday" => "Saturday"
      "day_saturday_short" => "Sat"
      "day_sunday" => "Sunday"
      "day_sunday_short" => "Sun"
      "day_thursday" => "Thursday"
      "day_thursday_short" => "Thu"
      "day_tuesday" => "Tuesday"
      "day_tuesday_short" => "Tue"
      "day_wednesday" => "Wednesday"
      "day_wednesday_short" => "Wed"
      "day_x_at_time_y" => "{day} at {time}"
      "delete" => "Delete"
      "edit_avatar" => "Edit avatar"
      "follow" => "Follow"
      "forums" => "Forums"
      "from_x_location" => "From {location}"
      "guest" => "Guest"
      "help" => "Help"
      "in_a_minute" => "In a minute"
      "in_a_moment" => "In a moment"
      "in_x_minutes" => "In {minutes} minutes"
      "later_today_at_x" => "Later today at {time}"
      "master_language" => "Master language"
      "master_style" => "Master style"
      "members" => "Members"
      "month_1" => "January"
      "month_10" => "October"
      "month_10_short" => "Oct"
      "month_11" => "November"
      "month_11_short" => "Nov"
      "month_12" => "December"
      "month_12_short" => "Dec"
      "month_1_short" => "Jan"
      "month_2" => "February"
      "month_2_short" => "Feb"
      "month_3" => "March"
      "month_3_short" => "Mar"
      "month_4" => "April"
      "month_4_short" => "Apr"
      "month_5" => "May"
      "month_5_short" => "May"
      "month_6" => "June"
      "month_6_short" => "Jun"
      "month_7" => "July"
      "month_7_short" => "Jul"
      "month_8" => "August"
      "month_8_short" => "Aug"
      "month_9" => "September"
      "month_9_short" => "Sep"
      "new_posts" => "New posts"
      "new_profile_posts" => "New profile posts"
      "no_items_to_display" => "No items to display"
      "none" => "None"
      "one_minute_ago" => "1 minute ago"
      "realms_realm_quiz_user" => "Realm Quiz User"
      "s9e_MediaSites_Footer_Credit" => "Media embeds via s9e/MediaSites"
      "show_hidden_content_by_x" => "Show hidden content by {names}"
      "show_ignored_content" => "Show ignored content"
      "showing_all_items" => "Showing all items"
      "showing_x_of_y_items" => "Showing {count} of {total} items"
      "spoiler" => "Spoiler"
      "staff_member" => "Staff member"
      "th_progress_bar_color_will_change_donate" => "Once this milestone has been reached the progress bar will change to this color. If left blank it will display the default color from your color palette."
      "there_are_x_items_in_total" => "There are {total} items in total"
      "time_am_lower" => "am"
      "time_am_upper" => "AM"
      "time_pm_lower" => "pm"
      "time_pm_upper" => "PM"
      "title_page_x" => " | Page {page}"
      "today_at_x" => "Today at {time}"
      "tomorrow_at_x" => "Tomorrow at {time}"
      "unfollow" => "Unfollow"
      "ungrouped" => "Ungrouped"
      "upload_file" => "Upload file"
      "viewing_an_error" => "Viewing an error"
      "x_b" => "{number}B"
      "x_bytes" => "{size} bytes"
      "x_gb" => "{size} GB"
      "x_k" => "{number}K"
      "x_kb" => "{size} KB"
      "x_m" => "{number}M"
      "x_mb" => "{size} MB"
      "x_minutes_ago" => "{minutes} minutes ago"
      "x_tb" => "{size} TB"
      "xfmg_browse_albums" => "Browse albums"
      "xfmg_x_seconds" => "{count} second(s)"
      "xfrm_resource_icon" => "Resource icon"
      "yesterday_at_x" => "Yesterday at {time}"
      "your_account" => "Your account"
      "th_reactplus_show_hidden_low_quality_content" => "Show hidden low quality content"
    ]
    #phrasesToLoad: array:1 [
      "thcovers_only_custom_can_be_positioned" => true
    ]
    #groupsCached: array:8 [
      "trophy_title" => true
      "reaction_title" => true
      "reactions" => true
      "widget" => true
      "widget_def" => true
      "thread_prefix" => true
      "button" => true
      "nav" => true
    ]
    #date: DateTime @1707741516 {#312
      date: 2024-02-12 07:38:36.0 America/New_York (-05:00)
    }
    #dayStartTimestamps: array:6 [
      "tomorrow" => "1732683600"
      "now" => 1732667921
      "today" => "1732597200"
      "todayDow" => "2"
      "yesterday" => "1732510800"
      "week" => "1732078800"
    ]
    #dowTranslation: array:7 [
      0 => "sunday"
      1 => "monday"
      2 => "tuesday"
      3 => "wednesday"
      4 => "thursday"
      5 => "friday"
      6 => "saturday"
    ]
    #rdc: array:61 [
      1498103375 => array:1 [ …1]
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      1333522829 => array:1 [ …1]
      1707741516 => array:1 [ …1]
    ]
  }
  "style" => Style {#321
    #id: "27"
    #lastModified: 1731439652
    #properties: array:696 [
      "adavAchievementCriteria" => array:3 [ …3]
      "adavAchievementCriterionProgressBar" => array:5 [ …5]
      "adavAchievementCriterionProgressBarInner" => array:3 [ …3]
      "adavAchievementCriterionProgressBarStatus" => array:1 [ …1]
      "adavAchievementExperience" => array:3 [ …3]
      "adavAchievementTitle" => array:2 [ …2]
      "adst_shepherdElement" => array:3 [ …3]
      "animationSpeed" => "0.2s"
      "audapp_primaryColor" => "#677e9a"
      "audapp_secondaryColor" => "#677e9a"
      "avatarBg" => "rgb(27,27,27)"
      "avatarBorderRadius" => "8px"
      "badge" => array:4 [ …4]
      "bbCodeBlock" => array:6 [ …6]
      "bbCodeBlockTitle" => array:3 [ …3]
      "bbCodeInlineCode" => array:9 [ …9]
      "blockBorder" => array:5 [ …5]
      "blockBorderRadius" => "8px"
      "blockFilterBar" => array:3 [ …3]
      "blockFooter" => array:5 [ …5]
      "blockFooterBg" => "rgb(45,45,45)"
      "blockFooterTextColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.6)"
      "blockHeader" => array:6 [ …6]
      "blockLink" => array:4 [ …4]
      "blockLinkSelected" => array:5 [ …5]
      "blockMinorHeader" => array:6 [ …6]
      "blockMinorTabHeader" => array:5 [ …5]
      "blockMinorTabHeaderSelected" => array:2 [ …2]
      "blockPaddingH" => "16px"
      "blockPaddingV" => "16px"
      "blockTabHeader" => array:6 [ …6]
      "blockTabHeaderBg" => "transparent"
      "blockTabHeaderSelected" => array:2 [ …2]
      "blockTabHeaderTextColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.6)"
      "blockTextHeader" => array:3 [ …3]
      "borderColor" => "rgba(255,255,255,.14)"
      "borderColorAccentContent" => "#677e9a"
      "borderColorAttention" => "#677e9a"
      "borderColorFaint" => "rgba(255,255,255,.14)"
      "borderColorFeature" => "#677e9a"
      "borderColorHeavy" => "rgba(255,255,255,.14)"
      "borderColorHighlight" => "#677e9a"
      "borderColorLight" => "rgba(255,255,255,.14)"
      "borderRadiusLarge" => "12px"
      "borderRadiusMedium" => "8px"
      "borderRadiusSmall" => "8px"
      "borderSize" => "0px"
      "borderSizeFeature" => "2px"
      "buttonBase" => array:8 [ …8]
      "buttonBg" => "fade(rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8), 14%)"
      "buttonCta" => array:3 [ …3]
      "buttonCtaBg" => "#677e9a"
      "buttonDefault" => array:3 [ …3]
      "buttonDisabled" => array:4 [ …4]
      "buttonPrimary" => array:3 [ …3]
      "buttonPrimaryBg" => "#677e9a"
      "buttonTextColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "chip" => array:5 [ …5]
      "chipHover" => array:1 [ …1]
      "chromeBg" => "mix(#677e9a, rgb(27,27,27), 10%)"
      "chromeTextColor" => "rgb(36,36,36)"
      "contentAccentBase" => array:2 [ …2]
      "contentAccentBg" => "mix(#677e9a, rgb(27,27,27), 10%)"
      "contentAccentLink" => array:1 [ …1]
      "contentAltBase" => array:2 [ …2]
      "contentAltBg" => "rgb(36,36,36)"
      "contentBase" => array:2 [ …2]
      "contentBg" => "rgb(27,27,27)"
      "contentHighlightBase" => array:2 [ …2]
      "contentHighlightBg" => "rgb(45,45,45)"
      "dataListFooter" => array:5 [ …5]
      "dataListHeader" => array:7 [ …7]
      "dataListPaddingH" => "16px"
      "dataListPaddingV" => "16px"
      "dataListSection" => array:5 [ …5]
      "editorBg" => "rgb(45,45,45)"
      "editorButtonActiveColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "editorButtonColor" => "fade(mix(rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8), rgb(255, 255, 255)), 85%)"
      "editorButtonDisabledColor" => "mix(rgb(27,27,27), rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.6), 60%)"
      "editorButtonHoverBg" => "fade(rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8), 15%)"
      "editorButtonHoverColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "editorButtonSelectedBg" => "fade(rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8), 15%)"
      "editorButtonSize" => "18px"
      "editorColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "editorFocusBg" => "xf-intensify(rgb(45,45,45), 1%)"
      "editorFocusColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "editorImageHandles" => "#677e9a"
      "editorSelectionBg" => "rgb(36,36,36)"
      "editorSelectionColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "editorToolsFocusBg" => "linear-gradient(180deg, rgb(45,45,45), xf-intensify(rgb(45,45,45), 1%))"
      "editorToolsOverflowBg" => "xf-intensify(rgb(45,45,45), 3%)"
      "elementSpacer" => "16px"
      "emailBg" => "rgb(18,18,18)"
      "emailBorderColor" => "rgba(255,255,255,.14)"
      "emailContentAltBg" => "rgb(36,36,36)"
      "emailContentBg" => "rgb(27,27,27)"
      "emailFont" => "ui-sans-serif,system-ui,sans-serif,Apple Color Emoji,Segoe UI Emoji,Segoe UI Symbol,Noto Color Emoji"
      "emailHeaderColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "emailLinkColor" => "#677e9a"
      "emailTextColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "emailTextColorMuted" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.6)"
      "fixedMessage" => array:7 [ …7]
      "flashMessage" => array:5 [ …5]
      "fontFamilyBody" => "ui-sans-serif,system-ui,sans-serif,Apple Color Emoji,Segoe UI Emoji,Segoe UI Symbol,Noto Color Emoji"
      "fontFamilyUi" => "ui-sans-serif,system-ui,sans-serif,Apple Color Emoji,Segoe UI Emoji,Segoe UI Symbol,Noto Color Emoji"
      "fontSizeLarge" => "1.6rem"
      "fontSizeLarger" => "2.0rem"
      "fontSizeLargest" => "2.4rem"
      "fontSizeNormal" => "1.6rem"
      "fontSizeSmall" => "1.4rem"
      "fontSizeSmaller" => "1.4rem"
      "fontSizeSmallest" => "1.1rem"
      "formExplain" => array:2 [ …2]
      "formHint" => array:2 [ …2]
      "formLabel" => array:3 [ …3]
      "formRowPaddingHInner" => "16px"
      "formRowPaddingHOuter" => "16px"
      "formRowPaddingV" => "16px"
      "formSectionHeader" => array:6 [ …6]
      "formSubmitRow" => array:3 [ …3]
      "globalActionColor" => "#677e9a"
      "inlineModBar" => array:6 [ …6]
      "inlineModHighlightColor" => "mix(#677e9a, rgb(27,27,27), 10%)"
      "input" => array:10 [ …10]
      "inputBgColor" => "rgb(45,45,45)"
      "inputDisabled" => array:2 [ …2]
      "inputFocus" => array:3 [ …3]
      "inputFocusBgColor" => "xf-intensify(rgb(45,45,45), 1%)"
      "inputTextColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "link" => array:2 [ …2]
      "linkColor" => "#677e9a"
      "linkHover" => array:2 [ …2]
      "linkHoverColor" => "xf-intensify(#677e9a, 17%)"
      "majorHeadingBg" => "transparent"
      "majorHeadingTextColor" => "rgb(255, 255, 255)"
      "memberHeader" => array:3 [ …3]
      "memberHeaderBlurbContainerBanner" => array:4 [ …4]
      "memberHeaderName" => array:2 [ …2]
      "memberTooltipBlurbContainerBanner" => array:5 [ …5]
      "memberTooltipHeader" => array:4 [ …4]
      "memberTooltipName" => array:1 [ …1]
      "menu" => array:6 [ …6]
      "menuBorderRadius" => "8px"
      "menuFeatureBorderColor" => "rgba(255,255,255,.14)"
      "menuFooter" => array:6 [ …6]
      "menuHeader" => array:5 [ …5]
      "menuLinkRow" => array:2 [ …2]
      "menuLinkRowSelected" => array:3 [ …3]
      "menuTabHeader" => array:5 [ …5]
      "menuTabHeaderSelected" => array:2 [ …2]
      "messageNewIndicator" => array:8 [ …8]
      "messagePadding" => "16px"
      "messagePaddingSmall" => "16px"
      "messageSignature" => array:7 [ …7]
      "messageUserBlock" => array:3 [ …3]
      "messageUserElements" => array:9 [ …9]
      "metaThemeColor" => "#677e9a"
      "minorBlockContent" => array:3 [ …3]
      "minorHeadingTextColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "nodeIconReadColor" => "#fff"
      "nodeIconUnreadColor" => "#fff"
      "nodeListDescriptionDisplay" => "inline"
      "overlayHeader" => array:8 [ …8]
      "overlayMaskColor" => "rgba(0, 0, 0, .3)"
      "paddingLarge" => "16px"
      "paddingLargest" => "24px"
      "paddingMedium" => "16px"
      "paddingSmall" => "8px"
      "pageBackground" => array:1 [ …1]
      "pageBg" => "rgb(18,18,18)"
      "pageEdgeSpacer" => "30px"
      "paletteAccent1" => "#677e9a"
      "paletteAccent2" => "#677e9a"
      "paletteAccent3" => "#677e9a"
      "paletteColor1" => "rgb(27,27,27)"
      "paletteColor2" => "rgb(36,36,36)"
      "paletteColor3" => "rgb(45,45,45)"
      "paletteColor4" => "rgb(18,18,18)"
      "paletteColor5" => "mix(#677e9a, rgb(27,27,27), 10%)"
      "paletteNeutral1" => "rgb(255, 255, 255)"
      "paletteNeutral2" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.6)"
      "paletteNeutral3" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "profilePostCommentToggle" => 1
      "progressBarColor" => "#677e9a"
      "publicFaviconUrl" => "styles/snipershide/snipershide/sh-favicon.svg"
      "publicFooter" => array:2 [ …2]
      "publicFooterLink" => array:1 [ …1]
      "publicHeader" => array:3 [ …3]
      "publicHeaderAdjustColor" => ""
      "publicIconUrl" => "data/assets/logo/192.png"
      "publicIconUrlLarge" => "data/assets/logo/512.png"
      "publicLogoHeight" => "60"
      "publicLogoUrl" => "styles/snipershide/snipershide/logo-top.svg"
      "publicLogoWidth" => "417"
      "publicMetadataLogoUrl" => "https://snipershide.com/shooting/styles/snipershide/snipershide/SHMetaplatev2.png"
      "publicNav" => array:3 [ …3]
      "publicNavCollapseWidth" => "1000px"
      "publicNavPaddingH" => "12px"
      "publicNavSelected" => array:2 [ …2]
      "publicNavTab" => array:5 [ …5]
      "publicNavTabHover" => array:2 [ …2]
      "publicNavTabMenuOpen" => array:1 [ …1]
      "publicStaffBar" => array:5 [ …5]
      "publicSubNav" => array:5 [ …5]
      "publicSubNavElHover" => array:1 [ …1]
      "publicSubNavElMenuOpen" => array:1 [ …1]
      "publicSubNavPaddingV" => "2px"
      "responsiveEdgeSpacerRemoval" => "1000px"
      "responsiveWide" => "1000px"
      "scrollJumpButtons" => "both"
      "sidebarSpacer" => "16px"
      "sidebarWidth" => "300px"
      "standaloneTab" => array:4 [ …4]
      "standaloneTabSelected" => array:2 [ …2]
      "starEmptyColor" => "rgba(255,255,255,.14)"
      "starFullColor" => "#677e9a"
      "styleType" => "dark"
      "subNavBg" => "rgb(45,45,45)"
      "subNavTextColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.6)"
      "textColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "textColorAccentContent" => "#677e9a"
      "textColorAttention" => "#677e9a"
      "textColorDimmed" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.6)"
      "textColorEmphasized" => "#677e9a"
      "textColorFeature" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "textColorMuted" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.6)"
      "th_nodeBody" => array:1 [ …1]
      "th_reactplus_countStyling" => array:8 [ …8]
      "thdonate_progressBar" => array:1 [ …1]
      "thdonate_progressBarContainer" => array:3 [ …3]
      "thfeature_slider" => array:1 [ …1]
      "thuix_webapp_backgroundColor" => "#677e9a"
      "thxpress_dotsNavigation" => 1
      "thxpress_postExcerptTitle" => array:4 [ …4]
      "tl_backgroundColor" => "rgb(45,45,45)"
      "tl_backgroundLightColor" => "rgb(27,27,27)"
      "tl_fontColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "tl_fontDarkColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "tl_fontExtraLightColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.6)"
      "tl_fontLightColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.6)"
      "tl_lineColor" => "rgba(255,255,255,.14)"
      "tl_lineLightColor" => "rgba(255,255,255,.14)"
      "tl_overlayColor" => "rgb(45,45,45)"
      "tl_primaryColor" => "#677e9a"
      "tl_secondaryColor" => "#677e9a"
      "tooltip" => array:8 [ …8]
      "uix_abridgedSignatures" => 1
      "uix_activeNavTitle" => 0
      "uix_activeNavTitleStyle" => array:7 [ …7]
      "uix_additionalCss" => "ac_app.less,realms.less"
      "uix_alertsUnread" => 0
      "uix_avatarShape" => "1"
      "uix_backstretch" => 0
      "uix_backstretchDuration" => "4000"
      "uix_backstretchFade" => "500"
      "uix_backstretchImages" => ""styles/acui/images/bg/1.jpg", "styles/acui/images/bg/2.jpg", "styles/acui/images/bg/3.jpg""
      "uix_backstretchSelector" => "body"
      "uix_betaMode" => 0
      "uix_blockBody" => []
      "uix_blockContainer" => array:3 [ …3]
      "uix_blockMessage" => array:3 [ …3]
      "uix_blockOuter" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_blockTabHeaderTab" => []
      "uix_borderRadiusJs" => 0
      "uix_borderRadiusSelectors" => ".p-footer-inner, .uix_extendedFooter, .p-nav, .p-sectionLinks, .p-staffBar, .p-header, #wpadminbar"
      "uix_bottomBreadcrumbLocation" => "belowMainContainer"
      "uix_brandmarkImage__breakpoint" => "0"
      "uix_breadcrumbItem" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_breadcrumbItem__active" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_breadcrumbStyle" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_breadcrumbWrapper" => []
      "uix_breadcrumbWrapperBottom" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_buttonActive" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_buttonCtaActive" => []
      "uix_buttonCtaHover" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_buttonHover" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_buttonLink" => array:4 [ …4]
      "uix_buttonPrimaryActive" => []
      "uix_buttonPrimaryHover" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_buttonRipple" => 1
      "uix_buttonSmall" => array:5 [ …5]
      "uix_canvas" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_canvasHeader" => []
      "uix_canvasNavItem" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_canvasNavItemActive" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_canvasNavItemHover" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_canvasNavSubItem" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_categoryCollapse" => 1
      "uix_categoryDescription" => array:5 [ …5]
      "uix_categoryDescriptionDisplay" => "tooltip"
      "uix_categoryIconStyle" => array:3 [ …3]
      "uix_categoryStrip" => array:5 [ …5]
      "uix_categoryStripIcons" => 0
      "uix_categoryStripOutsideWrapper" => 0
      "uix_clickableThreads" => 0
      "uix_collapseExtraInfo" => 1
      "uix_collapseStaffbarLinks" => 1
      "uix_collapseibleSubForums" => 0
      "uix_collapsibleSidebar" => 1
      "uix_collapsibleStickyThreads" => 1
      "uix_condenseVisitorTabs" => 0
      "uix_contentWrapper" => "0"
      "uix_contentWrapperStyle" => array:3 [ …3]
      "uix_copyrightOrder" => "30"
      "uix_defaultNavIcon" => 1
      "uix_defaultSidebarIcon" => 1
      "uix_detachedNavigation" => 1
      "uix_discussionList" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_discussionListAnimation" => 0
      "uix_discussionListCollapseWidth" => "1000px"
      "uix_discussionListItem" => []
      "uix_discussionListItemDeleted" => []
      "uix_discussionListItemEven" => ""
      "uix_discussionListItemHover" => ""
      "uix_discussionListItemModerated" => []
      "uix_discussionListItemSticky" => []
      "uix_discussionListTitle" => array:3 [ …3]
      "uix_discussionListTitleUnread" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_dropdownHover" => 0
      "uix_elevation1" => "0 10px 20px rgba(0,0,0,0.09), 0 6px 6px rgba(0,0,0,0.15)"
      "uix_elevation2" => "0 3px 10px 2px rgba(0,0,0,.1), 0 1px 18px 0px rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.12), 0 3px 5px 0 rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.2)"
      "uix_enableExtendedFooter" => 0
      "uix_enableMainTabs" => 0
      "uix_enableWelcomeHeaderImage" => 0
      "uix_extendedFooterOrder" => "10"
      "uix_extendedFooterStyle" => array:6 [ …6]
      "uix_extendedFooter__whiteText" => 0
      "uix_externalLinkIcon" => 1
      "uix_fab" => "mobile"
      "uix_fabBarBackground" => "rgb(27,27,27)"
      "uix_fabScroll" => 0
      "uix_fabVw" => "1000px"
      "uix_footerChooser" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_footerChooserHover" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_footerCopyrightRow" => array:4 [ …4]
      "uix_footerIcons" => 0
      "uix_footerInsideContent" => 0
      "uix_footerLinkHover" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_footerMenu" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_footerMenuOrder" => "20"
      "uix_footerWidget" => array:4 [ …4]
      "uix_footerWidgetBody" => []
      "uix_footerWidgetFooter" => array:4 [ …4]
      "uix_footerWidgetHeader" => array:5 [ …5]
      "uix_footerWidgetPadding" => "16px"
      "uix_footerWidgetRow" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_footerWidgetWidth" => "280px"
      "uix_forceCoverCopyright" => 0
      "uix_forceCoverExtendedFooter" => 0
      "uix_forceCoverFooterMenu" => 0
      "uix_glyphCategoryIcon" => ""
      "uix_glyphForumIcon" => ""
      "uix_glyphLinkIcon" => ""
      "uix_glyphPageIcon" => ""
      "uix_googleFonts" => ""
      "uix_headerWhiteSpace" => "0px"
      "uix_headerWrapper" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_headingFont" => "ui-sans-serif,system-ui,sans-serif,Apple Color Emoji,Segoe UI Emoji,Segoe UI Symbol,Noto Color Emoji"
      "uix_headingFontWeight" => "400"
      "uix_headingFontWeightHeavy" => "700"
      "uix_hideElementsDuringJSLoad" => 1
      "uix_hideExtendedFooterMobile" => 0
      "uix_hideNodeLastPost" => 0
      "uix_hideNodeStats" => 0
      "uix_hideSingleCrumb" => 1
      "uix_hideStyleChoose" => 0
      "uix_hideTopPagenavMobile" => 1
      "uix_homeCrumbIcon" => 1
      "uix_iconFont" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_iconFontFamily" => "material"
      "uix_iconSize" => "18px"
      "uix_iconSizeLarge" => "24px"
      "uix_imageForumIcon" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_imageForumUnreadIcon" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_imageIcon" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_imageLinkIcon" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_imagePageIcon" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_imagePath" => "styles/acui"
      "uix_jsPath" => "acui"
      "uix_lazyLoadSupport" => 0
      "uix_loginStyle" => "link"
      "uix_loginTriggerPosition" => "navigation"
      "uix_logoIcon" => "mdi mdi-tune"
      "uix_logoIconStyle" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_logoSmall" => ""
      "uix_logoText" => "UI.X"
      "uix_logoTextBreakpoint" => "650px"
      "uix_logoText__style" => array:4 [ …4]
      "uix_logoWidth" => "222.4px"
      "uix_mainTabsBarStyling" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_mainTabsHeight" => "50px"
      "uix_mainTabsSticky" => 0
      "uix_materialAvatars" => 1
      "uix_message" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_messageActionBar" => []
      "uix_messageAnimation" => 0
      "uix_messageAttachments" => array:3 [ …3]
      "uix_messageBody" => array:3 [ …3]
      "uix_messageControl" => array:7 [ …7]
      "uix_messageControlHover" => array:3 [ …3]
      "uix_messageLikes" => array:5 [ …5]
      "uix_messageMain" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_messageMeta" => array:4 [ …4]
      "uix_messageNotice" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_metaCell" => []
      "uix_mobileTabsNav" => 1
      "uix_navAboveHeader" => 0
      "uix_navLogoVertSpacing" => "11px"
      "uix_navTabIconStyle" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_navTabIcons" => 0
      "uix_navigationBarHeight" => "72px"
      "uix_navigationType" => "default"
      "uix_newNodeMarker" => 1
      "uix_newNodeMarkerStyle" => array:8 [ …8]
      "uix_nodeAnimations" => 0
      "uix_nodeBlockBody" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_nodeBody" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_nodeBodyEven" => ""
      "uix_nodeBodyHover" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_nodeClickable" => 1
      "uix_nodeContainer" => array:4 [ …4]
      "uix_nodeDescription" => array:3 [ …3]
      "uix_nodeIconImages" => 0
      "uix_nodeIconStyle" => array:4 [ …4]
      "uix_nodeIconWidth" => "51px"
      "uix_nodePadding" => "16px"
      "uix_nodeStatsHover" => 0
      "uix_nodeStatsIcons" => 1
      "uix_nodeTitle" => array:4 [ …4]
      "uix_nodeTitle__unread" => []
      "uix_noticeLocation" => "aboveMainContainer"
      "uix_onlineIndicator" => "default"
      "uix_originalPoster" => "icon"
      "uix_pageAnimation" => 0
      "uix_pageStyle" => "covered"
      "uix_pageTitle" => array:3 [ …3]
      "uix_pageWidthToggle" => "fixed"
      "uix_pageWrapper" => array:4 [ …4]
      "uix_parallax" => 0
      "uix_parallaxImage" => "styles/acui/images/welcome-banner.png"
      "uix_parallaxPosition" => "center"
      "uix_parallaxSelector" => ".uix_welcomeSection"
      "uix_postBitAvatarSize" => "small"
      "uix_postBitIcons" => 1
      "uix_prefixAccent" => "#677e9a"
      "uix_prefixBlue" => "#2196F3"
      "uix_prefixGray" => "#616161"
      "uix_prefixGreen" => "#4CAF50"
      "uix_prefixLightGreen" => "#8BC34A"
      "uix_prefixOlive" => "#689F38"
      "uix_prefixOrange" => "#FF9800"
      "uix_prefixPrimary" => "#677e9a"
      "uix_prefixRed" => "#D32F2F"
      "uix_prefixRedSkyBlue" => "#03A9F4"
      "uix_prefixRoyalBlue" => "#0D47A1"
      "uix_prefixSilver" => "#CFD8DC"
      "uix_prefixYellow" => "#FFEB3B"
      "uix_primaryColor" => "#677e9a"
      "uix_primaryColorDarker" => "#677e9a"
      "uix_removeBottomBreadcrumb" => 0
      "uix_removeHeaderWrapper" => 1
      "uix_removeIndexPageTitle" => 0
      "uix_removeMessageArrow" => 1
      "uix_removePageAction" => 0
      "uix_removeRegisterText" => 0
      "uix_removeVisitorTabsText" => 1
      "uix_removeWhatsNewButtons" => 1
      "uix_responsiveLogoFontSize" => ""
      "uix_rightAlignNavigation" => 0
      "uix_scrollableSidebar" => 0
      "uix_searchBar" => array:5 [ …5]
      "uix_searchBarFocus" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_searchBarHeight" => "36px"
      "uix_searchBarPlaceholderColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.6)"
      "uix_searchBarPlaceholderFocusColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.8)"
      "uix_searchBarWidth" => "250px"
      "uix_searchButton" => 0
      "uix_searchIcon" => array:6 [ …6]
      "uix_searchIconBehavior" => "expandMobile"
      "uix_searchIconFocusColor" => "rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.6)"
      "uix_searchPosition" => "header"
      "uix_search_maxResponsiveWidth" => "10000px"
      "uix_secondaryColor" => "#677e9a"
      "uix_sectionBg" => "#677e9a"
      "uix_sectionLinksStickyStyle" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_separateThreads" => 1
      "uix_shareWidgetModal" => 1
      "uix_sideNavCollapsed" => 0
      "uix_sideNavigationAnimation" => 0
      "uix_sidebarBlockRow" => []
      "uix_sidebarBreakpoint" => "1000px"
      "uix_sidebarIcons" => 0
      "uix_sidebarLocation" => "right"
      "uix_sidebarMobileCanvas" => 1
      "uix_sidebarNavWidth" => "210px"
      "uix_sidebarNavigationStyle" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_sidebarTriggerPhrase" => 0
      "uix_sidebarTriggerPosition" => "sectionLinks"
      "uix_sidebarWidgetAnimations" => 0
      "uix_sidebarWidgetFooter" => []
      "uix_sidebarWidgetHeading" => array:3 [ …3]
      "uix_sidebarWidgetWrapper" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_signatureHoverEnabled" => 0
      "uix_signatureMaxHeight" => "100"
      "uix_similarScrollNotice" => 1
      "uix_socialMediaIcon" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_socialMediaPosition" => "copyright"
      "uix_staffBarBreakpoint" => "1000px"
      "uix_staffBarTab" => array:4 [ …4]
      "uix_staffBarTabHover" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_stickyCategoryStrips" => 0
      "uix_stickyNavHeight" => "72px"
      "uix_stickyNavigationStyle" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_stickySectionLinkHeight" => "40px"
      "uix_stickySidebar" => "disabled"
      "uix_stickySidebarCalcDelay" => "100"
      "uix_stickySidenav" => 1
      "uix_stickyStaffBar" => 1
      "uix_stickyStaffBarHeight" => "40px"
      "uix_stickyStaffbarStyle" => []
      "uix_structPaddingH" => "16px"
      "uix_structPaddingV" => "16px"
      "uix_subForumTitle" => array:1 [ …1]
      "uix_swipeSupport" => 0
      "uix_tabBarLocation" => "header"
      "uix_tablinksInSideNav" => 1
      "uix_tag" => []
      "uix_tagHover" => []
      "uix_textSelection" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_threadField" => array:3 [ …3]
      "uix_threadListSeparator" => array:4 [ …4]
      "uix_titlebar" => array:5 [ …5]
      "uix_titlebarLocation" => "mainContainerTop"
      "uix_topBreadcrumbLocation" => "aboveMainContainer"
      "uix_transition" => "cubic-bezier(0.4, 0, 0.2, 1)"
      "uix_userTabsPosition" => "navigation"
      "uix_version" => "2.2.15.0.2"
      "uix_viewportCenterLogo" => "0px"
      "uix_viewportCollapseStaffLinks" => "1000px"
      "uix_viewportCollapseStats" => "1000px"
      "uix_viewportCondenseVisitorTabs" => "10000px"
      "uix_viewportRemoveRegisterText" => "650px"
      "uix_viewportRemoveVisitorTabsText" => "100000px"
      "uix_viewportShowLogoBlock" => "100%"
      "uix_viewportWidthRemoveSubNav" => "1px"
      "uix_visitorPanelIcons" => 0
      "uix_visitorTabsMobile" => "initial"
      "uix_voteActionButton" => "mobile"
      "uix_welcomeSectionForumListOnly" => 1
      "uix_welcomeSectionIcon__style" => array:3 [ …3]
      "uix_welcomeSectionInner" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_welcomeSectionLocation" => "sidebar"
      "uix_welcomeSectionOverlay" => ""
      "uix_welcomeSectionText__style" => array:4 [ …4]
      "uix_welcomeSectionTitle__style" => array:2 [ …2]
      "uix_welcomeSectionVisible" => "guests"
      "uix_welcomeSection__buttonText" => "Register"
      "uix_welcomeSection__icon" => ""
      "uix_welcomeSection__style" => array:3 [ …3]
      "uix_welcomeSection__text" => "Get access to live stream, lessons, the post exchange, and chat with other snipers."
      "uix_welcomeSection__title" => "Join the Hide community"
      "uix_welcomeSection__url" => "register"
      "uix_widgetPadding" => "16px"
      "xpress_articleListLayout" => "list"
      "xpress_authorBlock" => array:10 [ …10]
      "xpress_dropcap" => 0
      "xpress_featuredArticleStyle" => "carousel"
      "xpress_featuredExcerptLength" => "150"
      "xpress_featuredItemsCount" => "3"
      "xpress_removeFeaturedExcerpt" => 1
      "adavAchievement" => []
      "adavAchievementCriterionTitle" => []
      "adavAchievementCriterionTitleCompleted" => array:1 [ …1]
      "adavAchievementTitleCommon" => []
      "adavAchievementTitleEpic" => array:1 [ …1]
      "adavAchievementTitleLegendary" => array:1 [ …1]
      "adavAchievementTitleRare" => array:1 [ …1]
      "adavAchievementTitleUncommon" => array:1 [ …1]
      "adavAchievementTitleUnique" => array:1 [ …1]
      "adav_memberLevelBadeLocation" => "stats"
      "audfeeds_chromeless_tabs" => 0
      "audfeeds_tabbar_location" => "aboveMainContent"
      "audfeeds_tabsWrapper" => []
      "avatarDefaultImage" => ""
      "avatarDefaultTextContent" => "?"
      "avatarDefaultType" => "text"
      "avatarDynamicFont" => "'Arial', sans-serif"
      "avatarDynamicLineHeight" => "1.04"
      "avatarDynamicTextPercent" => "60"
      "badgeHighlighted" => array:2 [ …2]
      "bbCodeBlockExpandHeight" => "150px"
      "bbCodeImgFloatMargin" => "0.25em"
      "bbCodeImgFloatMarginAfter" => "1.35em"
      "bbCodeImgLarge" => "512px"
      "bbCodeImgMedium" => "128px"
      "bbCodeImgSmall" => "64px"
      "borderSizeMinorFeature" => "2px"
      "editorToolsBg" => "transparent"
      "emailPublicLogoUrl" => ""
      "errorBg" => "rgb(253, 233, 233)"
      "errorColor" => "rgb(200, 68, 72)"
      "errorFeatureColor" => "rgb(200, 68, 72)"
      "findThreadsNavStyle" => "tabs"
      "fontAwesomeWeight" => "400"
      "fontFamilyCode" => "Monaco, Menlo, Consolas, 'Roboto Mono', 'Andale Mono', 'Ubuntu Mono', monospace"
      "fontWeightHeavy" => "700"
      "fontWeightLight" => "300"
      "fontWeightNormal" => "400"
      "formLabelWidth" => "33%"
      "formResponsive" => "540px"
      "formSubmitSticky" => 1
      "lineHeightDefault" => "1.4"
      "memberHeaderNameBanner" => array:1 [ …1]
      "memberTooltipNameBanner" => array:1 [ …1]
      "messageSingleColumnWidth" => "650px"
      "messageUserBlockWidth" => "120px"
      "nfCalendarDateIcons" => 0
      "nodeListSubDisplay" => "menu"
      "noticeScrollInterval" => "6"
      "overlayMaskBlur" => "0px"
      "overlayTopMargin" => "4vh"
      "pageNavStyle" => "mixed"
      "pageWidthMax" => "1200px"
      "publicIconsMaskable" => 0
      "publicLogoUrl2x" => ""
      "publicNavPaddingV" => "8px"
      "publicNavSticky" => "primary"
      "publicPushBadgeUrl" => "styles/default/xenforo/bell.png"
      "publicPwaInstallVideoUrl" => "styles/default/xenforo/add_to_home.mp4"
      "publicSubNavPaddingH" => "8px"
      "reactionSummaryOnLists" => ""
      "responsiveMedium" => "650px"
      "responsiveNarrow" => "480px"
      "successBg" => "rgb(218, 243, 216)"
      "successColor" => "rgb(61, 121, 63)"
      "successFeatureColor" => "rgb(99, 178, 101)"
      "th_backgroundSelector_nodes" => ".node--id{node_id} > .node-body"
      "th_enableGrid_nodes" => 0
      "th_enableGrid_nodes_advanced" => 0
      "th_enableNodeFooter_nodes" => 1
      "th_enableStyling_nodes" => 0
      "th_imageOverlay" => "rgba(0,0,0,.4)"
      "th_nodeGutter" => "10px"
      "th_reactplus_condensedSummary" => 0
      "th_reactplus_countMin" => "1"
      "th_reactplus_showCounter" => 0
      "th_textSelector_nodes" => ".node--id{node_id} > .node-body, .node--id{node_id} > .node-body a"
      "th_uix_staffMessageBlock" => []
      "th_uix_staffMessageNewIndicator" => []
      "th_uix_staffMessageSignature" => []
      "th_uix_staffMessageUserBlock" => []
      "th_uix_threadStarterMessageBlock" => []
      "th_uix_threadStarterMessageNewIndicator" => []
      "th_uix_threadStarterMessageSignature" => []
      "th_uix_threadStarterMessageUserBlock" => []
      "thdonate_separateCompletedCampaigns" => 0
      "thfeature_defaultFeatureBackground" => ""
      "thfeature_display_style" => "default"
      "thfeature_firstPost_article" => 1
      "thfeature_firstPost_author" => 1
      "thfeature_firstPost_style" => array:2 [ …2]
      "thfeature_icon_size" => "l"
      "thfeature_icon_style" => "default"
      "thfeature_pageTitle" => 0
      "thmonetize_userUpgradeCurrency" => array:1 [ …1]
      "thmonetize_userUpgradeLength" => array:1 [ …1]
      "thmonetize_userUpgradeOccurrence" => array:1 [ …1]
      "thmonetize_userUpgradePrice" => array:1 [ …1]
      "thmonetize_userUpgradeShapeBorderWidth" => "12px"
      "thmonetize_userUpgradeShapeWidth" => "220px"
      "thnodes_enable_header_styling_categoryView" => 0
      "thnodes_enable_header_styling_forumView" => 0
      "thnodes_enable_header_styling_threadView" => 0
      "thnodes_enable_icons" => 0
      "thnodes_show_header_icon" => 0
      "thuix_webapp_icon192x192" => ""
      "thuix_webapp_icon512x512" => ""
      "thxpress_articleFeaturedImageCover" => 1
      "thxpress_carouselItems" => "1"
      "thxpress_excerpt" => 1
      "thxpress_excerptLimit" => "55"
      "thxpress_hideSignature" => 0
      "thxpress_postThumbnails" => 1
      "thxpress_showFunctionalTags" => 0
      "voteNegativeColor" => "rgb(200, 68, 72)"
      "votePositiveColor" => "rgb(99, 178, 101)"
      "warningBg" => "rgb(251, 247, 226)"
      "warningColor" => "rgb(132, 101, 61)"
      "warningFeatureColor" => "rgb(220, 218, 84)"
      "whatsNewNavStyle" => "tabs"
      "xfmgCategoryList" => "container"
      "xpress_articleThumbnailSize" => "thumbnail"
      "xpress_categoryScroller" => 1
      "xpress_removeFeaturedMeta" => 0
      "xpress_vwColumnBreakpoint" => "650px"
      "zIndexMultiplier" => "100"
    ]
    #options: array:14 [
      "style_id" => 27
      "parent_id" => 26
      "parent_list" => array:6 [ …6]
      "title" => "Realms: Sniper's Hide (Dark)"
      "description" => ""
      "assets" => []
      "effective_assets" => []
      "user_selectable" => true
      "designer_mode" => null
      "th_product_id_uix" => 0
      "th_product_version_uix" => null
      "th_primary_child_uix" => false
      "th_child_style_xml_uix" => ""
      "th_child_style_cache_uix" => []
    ]
  }
  "isRtl" => false
  "options" => ArrayObject {#229
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      "acpSearchExclude" => []
      "activitySummaryEmail" => array:4 [ …4]
      "activitySummaryEmailBatchLimit" => "100"
      "ad_lb_alertTop" => "15"
      "ad_lb_awardTop" => "10"
      "ad_lb_cache" => "5"
      "ad_lb_defaultSort" => "weekly"
      "ad_lb_enable_pagination" => "1"
      "ad_lb_incrementNumber" => "5"
      "ad_lb_rankChanges" => "1"
      "ad_lb_types" => array:5 [ …5]
      "ad_lb_userEntry" => "1"
      "ad_lb_userEntry_rank" => "1"
      "adav_level_formula" => "logarithmic"
      "adav_level_formula_data" => array:4 [ …4]
      "adca_dismissDuration" => "0"
      "adca_dismissible" => "1"
      "adca_notifyCutoff" => "7"
      "adca_notifyUserAfter" => "7"
      "addBanUserGroup" => "23"
      "adminRequireTfa" => "0"
      "adsDisallowedTemplates" => """
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        login\n
        login_password_confirm\n
        login_two_step\n
        message_page\n
        register_complete\n
        register_connected_account\n
        register_confirm\n
        register_form
        """
      "akismetKey" => "8be4acf584c1"
      "alertExpiryDays" => "3"
      "alertsPerPage" => "25"
      "alertsPopupExpiryDays" => "7"
      "allowGuestRte" => "1"
      "allowVideoUploads" => array:2 [ …2]
      "allowedCodeLanguages" => """
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        csharp\n
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        java\n
        javascript\n
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        svg\n
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        """
      "approveSharedBannedRejectedIp" => array:2 [ …2]
      "attachmentExtensions" => """
        zip\n
        txt\n
        pdf\n
        png\n
        jpg\n
        jpeg\n
        jpe\n
        gif
        """
      "attachmentMaxDimensions" => array:2 [ …2]
      "attachmentMaxFileSize" => "25000"
      "attachmentMaxPerMessage" => "25"
      "attachmentThumbnailDimensions" => "150"
      "audapi_oauthEncryptionKey" => "hacxn11Rc7qZVYsNav1FwiFV3dkluCMUZw81Czgdjg0="
      "audapi_oauthPrivateKey" => """
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        -----END PRIVATE KEY-----\n
        """
      "audapi_oauthPublicKey" => """
        -----BEGIN PUBLIC KEY-----\n
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        -----END PUBLIC KEY-----\n
        """
      "audapp_appConfig" => array:4 [ …4]
      "audapp_appConfigFailures" => "0"
      "audapp_appConfigKey" => "d3ZYUjJEUEFxdERyOWlWbQ=="
      "audapp_appId" => "com.snipershide.app"
      "audapp_appleBid" => "com.snipershide.app.ios"
      "audapp_appleEnvironment" => "default"
      "audapp_appleSharedSecret" => "f0673ec43fea4ce69a9cab6b362d3738"
      "audapp_darkStyleId" => "22"
      "audapp_enableAppInstallBanner" => "1"
      "audapp_enableExtraNodeData" => "1"
      "audapp_enableInlineAds" => "1"
      "audapp_enableInterstitialAds" => "1"
      "audapp_enablePushLog" => "0"
      "audapp_featureToggles" => array:11 [ …11]
      "audapp_googleClientEmail" => "[email protected]"
      "audapp_googlePackageName" => "com.snipershide.app.android"
      "audapp_googlePrivateKey" => "-----BEGIN PRIVATE KEY-----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\nSrUfD9J1NACHWIyn0VfLwuXB\n-----END PRIVATE KEY-----\n"
      "audapp_googleProjectId" => "pc-api-8550534343379152468-165"
      "audapp_iOSAppStoreId" => ""
      "audapp_isSetup" => "1"
      "audapp_killApp" => "0"
      "audapp_killPushNotifications" => "0"
      "audapp_lightStyleId" => "21"
      "audapp_logPushApiErrors" => "0"
      "audapp_newPostDisplayMode" => "thread"
      "audapp_pageDisplayTypes" => array:5 [ …5]
      "audav_earn_alerts" => "first"
      "audav_level_alerts" => "1"
      "audav_showEarnOnModal" => "0"
      "audentioapi_oauthAccessTokenTTL" => "2592000"
      "audentioapi_oauthRefreshTokenTTL" => "5184000"
      "audentiocommunity_lastReportEval" => "0"
      "audentiocommunity_reportScore" => "0"
      "audentioleaderboards_pageSize" => "25"
      "audfeeds_ajaxTabs" => "1"
      "audfeeds_ajaxUpdate" => "1"
      "audfeeds_ajaxUpdateRate" => "5"
      "audfeeds_availablePrefixFilters" => []
      "audfeeds_availableTTFilters" => []
      "audfeeds_cachePageCount" => "1"
      "audfeeds_cacheTime" => "5"
      "audfeeds_cacheTimeLong" => "24"
      "audfeeds_createButton" => array:7 [ …7]
      "audfeeds_curatedLimit" => "100"
      "audfeeds_curatedMaxDays" => "30"
      "audfeeds_decay" => "exp"
      "audfeeds_dropdownSelect" => "1"
      "audfeeds_enableCustomOrder" => "0"
      "audfeeds_enableNodeFilter" => "1"
      "audfeeds_enablePage" => "1"
      "audfeeds_entriesPerPage" => "25"
      "audfeeds_excludeNodeIds" => []
      "audfeeds_filterAutoSave" => "0"
      "audfeeds_filterWidgetPosition" => "sidenav"
      "audfeeds_hideGuestMedia" => "1"
      "audfeeds_holdPromotionX" => "60"
      "audfeeds_maxPages" => "1000"
      "audfeeds_newsFeedReactions" => "0"
      "audfeeds_promoteEverySocialX" => "60"
      "audfeeds_promoteEveryX" => "60"
      "audfeeds_redirectWhatsNew" => "0"
      "audfeeds_unlimitedScroll" => "1"
      "audfeeds_unreadIndicators" => "1"
      "audfeeds_weightComment" => "1000"
      "audfeeds_weightPost" => "1000"
      "audfeeds_weightRating" => "1000"
      "audfeeds_weightReaction" => "100"
      "audfeeds_weightReactionSocial" => "100"
      "audfeeds_weightView" => "1"
      "audlive_logApiErrors" => "0"
      "autoEmbedMedia" => array:2 [ …2]
      "boardActive" => "1"
      "boardDescription" => "Sniper's Hide Forum"
      "boardInactiveMessage" => "Sniper's Hide is currently undergoing an upgrade. Check back in a few hours!"
      "boardShortTitle" => ""
      "boardTitle" => "Sniper's Hide Forum"
      "boardUrl" => "https://www.snipershide.com/shooting"
      "boardUrlCanonical" => "0"
      "bounceEmailAddress" => ""
      "captcha" => "ReCaptcha"
      "categoryOwnPage" => "0"
      "censorCharacter" => "*"
      "censorWords" => []
      "changeLogLength" => "60"
      "collectServerStats" => array:4 [ …4]
      "contactEmailAddress" => "[email protected]"
      "contactEmailSenderHeader" => "0"
      "contactUrl" => array:3 [ …3]
      "conversationPopupExpiryHours" => "72"
      "convertMarkdownToBbCode" => "0"
      "cookieConsent" => array:1 [ …1]
      "cookieConsentLogLength" => "90"
      "currentVersionId" => "2021672"
      "defaultEmailAddress" => "[email protected]"
      "defaultEmailStyleId" => "15"
      "defaultLanguageId" => "1"
      "defaultStyleId" => "27"
      "disallowedCustomTitles" => """
        admin\n
        moderator
        """
      "discourageBlankChance" => "10"
      "discourageDelay" => array:2 [ …2]
      "discourageFloodMultiplier" => "10"
      "discourageRedirectChance" => "15"
      "discourageRedirectUrl" => ""
      "discourageSearchChance" => "40"
      "discussionPreview" => "1"
      "discussionRssContentLength" => "500"
      "discussionsPerPage" => "20"
      "displayVisitorCount" => "title_and_icon"
      "dynamicAvatarEnable" => "1"
      "editHistory" => array:2 [ …2]
      "editLogDisplay" => array:2 [ …2]
      "editorDropdownConfig" => array:1 [ …1]
      "editorToolbarConfig" => array:4 [ …4]
      "emailBounceHandler" => array:7 [ …7]
      "emailConversationIncludeMessage" => "1"
      "emailDkim" => array:5 [ …5]
      "emailFileCheckWarning" => array:2 [ …2]
      "emailSenderName" => ""
      "emailShare" => "1"
      "emailSoftBounceThreshold" => array:3 [ …3]
      "emailTransport" => array:7 [ …7]
      "emailUnsubscribeHandler" => array:7 [ …7]
      "emailWatchedThreadIncludeMessage" => "1"
      "emojiSource" => array:2 [ …2]
      "emojiStyle" => "emojione"
      "enableMemberList" => "0"
      "enableNewsFeed" => "1"
      "enableNotices" => "1"
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      "s9e_MediaSites_Markup" => "media"
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      "th_instagramUrl_uix" => "https://www.instagram.com/shlowlight"
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      "thconnectedaccountproviders_mapToCustom" => array:2 [ …2]
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        jpg\n
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        psd\n
        tif
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So I started AA. any pointers

B

boomer81

Guest
bear pit love this place as it a no bullshit deal. I worked in prison a few year. quit last week. to work on me. we saved up for a few months worth of bills.
it's a easy job with a\lot of stress a govt bullshit. we have the highest rates of alcoholism lowest life expactencty. 2nd only to the crab fishermen in death at work.
I was feeling institutionalized. drinking raging bringing it home. anyhow aa is my affordable option. my dr has me on Xanax and Zoloft. if your in Leo how hard and long to it take you to go back in to the real world real world. I'm slowly decompressing. thanks to all have any of you guys got the aa route has it worked out.

 
I am not LEO. But i commend you on taking action. There are many here that may be able to help. You may want to see if you can get access to the private LEO/Military forum. I am sure it is a place that you could express yourself freely without judgement.
I would like to think you could do that here but it is the pit. I am not saying you can't try here. I for one will supoort you in your effort to better yourself.
 
Exercise really helps. Weights, jogging, dog-walking, whatever. Try to physically wear yourself out each day. It'll make a positive difference. Good Luck and good for you
 
Lifestyle change. As suggested above, exercise is good for the body and soul. Do a checklist of stuff that exacerbates the problem and start eliminating them. Good luck, stay strong, stick with the program.
 
Good decision, especially if you realized it yourself. I'm of the belief that a person can do anything they want to if they put their mind to it and actually WANT to do it. Addiction isn't a disease, it's a crutch. The government and drug companies have decided to call it a disease because there is money to be made.

take it one day at a time and keep your head straight. You will be fine and it will get better.
 
Good decision, especially if you realized it yourself. I'm of the belief that a person can do anything they want to if they put their mind to it and actually WANT to do it. Addiction isn't a disease, it's a crutch. The government and drug companies have decided to call it a disease because there is money to be made.

take it one day at a time and keep your head straight. You will be fine and it will get better.

Its a disease. A 'dis-ease' of the mind or heart that makes one seek relief. Unfortunately the relief is too often found in a crutch like alcohol or drugs or self mutilation rather than discovering and correcting the factor that is causing the 'dis- ease'. The companies just mis represent the best treatment, offering a crutch rather than a cure.
 
Get a sponsor asap. Get into weightlifting and hit the range as much as possible, idk bout you but shooting and hunting is my only "zen" time or whatever I dont know how to meditate. Get off the xans ASAP!!!!!! Please for the love of god get off of em as soon as is physically possible. If you think alcohol is a bad deal, youll be wishin you just kept drinkin in no time flat with them devils. This is provided youre taking them daily. If you aint taking them daily then youre good to go, just dont ever start taking them everyday. If your doc has you on em every day, even if just nightly, stop as soon as you physically can. You got about 14-18 days before youll be complete wreck without them, panic attacks, seizure risk, the whole 9. Way way worse than any DTs. Seen many many folks who had benzo w/d lasting 1+ year.. granted they were on em for quite some time; regardless theyre nothing to play with at all. People think opiates are bad, atleast dope and painkiller w/d has a light at the end a the tunnel after a week or 2 and the withdrawal aint fckn potentially lethal, good luck ever feeling normal again after a serious benzo habit. Not to scare you cause as I said if you aint taking them everyday then youre fine, but if youre on em everyday it only takes 2 weeks - 1 month before youre in deep deep shit so please dont go there. The antidepressants.. I aint real sure. It apparently does help some folks, it also makes some folks suicidal, youll just have to see how it works for ya I guess. Keeping in mind that even those antidepressants are a demon themself with horrific withdrawal when you decide youve had enough. Dont let your Dr tell you they dont, look up actual user reports of people who had to come off of them and know that that may happen to you if you ever stop taking them. No real experience with those Im just going off what others have said was their experience and Id suggest atleast doing that instead of just taking the docs word as gospel. Good luck and keep your head up, you were a man going into this and youll be a man coming outta it.

I guess I should caveat that some people are cool with taking this stuff everyday until they die, and report theyre happy that way and it works for em. Just gotta decide what you want. Be careful and do some research though, lot of the doctors never took the stuff they prescribe so they dont truly know what it feels like, or what it feels like to go without after a while. Honestly Im surprised some of the stuff we prescribe is even considered a good thing, youd be better off just giving half the folks opium or some such, totally serious not joking one bit...
 
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Its a disease. A 'dis-ease' of the mind or heart that makes one seek relief. Unfortunately the relief is too often found in a crutch like alcohol or drugs or self mutilation rather than discovering and correcting the factor that is causing the 'dis- ease'. The companies just mis represent the best treatment, offering a crutch rather than a cure.

Cancer is a disease. Measles are a disease. Addiction, like suicide is a crutch and taking the easy way out. It is sad to see anyone deal with any of it but that's the way I see it. Someone may have an addictive personality but ultimately they put that shit in their body and let it get hold of them. It's harder to admit you have a problem or even realize you do and address it than to just deny it or continue to enable it. This is coming from someone who's dealt with it both personally and and with friends. Everyone has some shit with them to deal with, the strong face it and march on. I saw I had a problem with alcohol and I dealt with it accordingly. Good on the OP for doing the same. I've had friends kill themselves over shit. Looking back in hindsight there's shit I should have noticed and never did. It pains me knowing that now and not then. When the day comes I see them again the first thing I plan on doing is center punching him in the face before I hug him. He was better than that. If someone needs to take something to help them get away from an addiction then so be it but the longer you go on a prescription the more likely you are to replace one substance with another. Modern medine at large is a money scheme just as much as political wars. Look at all the pain pills being sent to hard hit areas like West Virginia and such.

Anyway, all that is for another time and place. I commend the OP for taking a step to the plate and facing the storm head on.
 
Amen oneshot
fellas, you both have valid points and this is about Boomer and us supporting Boomer how we know how. Make statements that align with your beliefs that support him and dont frickin argue.

 
hey I think your both right. I have bad anxiety and depression. thats the disease the booze is the cure. it's the wrong one. but yeah it's a crutch. the benzos are half a pill when I feel the need to drink. not everyday. I have had benzos in the cabinet for quite awhile before this. I know not to fuck with them. my issues are pure alcohol probably not the right place to ask this it should probably be in the Leo forum. I just figured there were some guys with my background here. just the first time I've tried getting help I've stopped in long periods of the past. the funny thing is talking in front of a group makes me want to drink more than anything.
 
The longest journey starts with one step.
Knockout one day at a time, these goals soon turn into months ect.
Replace the time taken to drink with family and friends.
If I could do it anyone can.
June 4th was my 13th year sober.
Having a sponsor/friend with the same experience is vital.


R
 
Amen oneshot
fellas, you both have valid points and this is about Boomer and us supporting Boomer how we know how. Make statements that align with your beliefs that support him and dont frickin argue.

I absolutely agree, that said, I stand with my statement. Recognizing something for what it is is a big step toward recovery.

Just calling a problem 'a crutch' doesnt begin to address the underlying reasons that cause one to need the crutch. So with that, and as well as AA, I suggest some deep and introspective time, perhaps with a pastor, or good friend, trying to understand 'WHY' you have this predilection towards alcohol abuse. It came from somewhere. There is an old saying by a very wise man..."You shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free." Find the root cause, cut the root, and be free of the problem. Until you do that it will be a constant 'fight". which is better than not fighting and giving in, but not the best out come.

Find the core issue, and do all the other stuff recommended like lifestyle change.

And keep us informed, there's a lot of support here.
 
The longest journey starts with one step.
Knockout one day at a time, these goals soon turn into months ect.
Replace the time taken to drink with family and friends.
If I could do it anyone can.
June 4th was my 13th year sober.
Having a sponsor/friend with the same experience is vital.


R

Congratulations.

My problem was not alcohol, but tobacco addiction. Free of that stuff 33 years. As you put it, "If I can do it anyone can."
 
My medical issues TRIPLE my odds of dying from heart attack/stroke/suicide and that silly bitch at the VA just tries to hand me anti depressants. I tried 4 different AD's and they all made shit worse so I started riding a bike. When I feel like shit I go pedal my ass off for an hour or five and I can function, I started off doing 20 mile rides and am now getting ready for a 100 mile race. The silly bitch at the VA is mad that I won't take her meds (I swear she gets a kickback from pharma inc.) but I am doing better than any of her patients/victims and am in better shape than when I was 20.

The sweat and pain of exercise are your new best friends and will probably save your ass, good luck brother.
 
dude dont shit on this thread please...
homeboy is on his way to better health and you want to argue the lame shit

I already said it was for another time and place. I'm not arguing anything. As I said more than once already, I commend the OP for taking a step back and addressing what's become a problem. That's the biggest part of it all.

Take it one day at a time and find healthy stuff to fill your time. You already know you can do it, just set out every day to follow through with it and stay the course. Lots of people willing to help, both here and around you I'm sure. Good luck and carry on.
 
bear pit love this place as it a no bullshit deal. I worked in prison a few year. quit last week. to work on me. we saved up for a few months worth of bills.
it's a easy job with a\lot of stress a govt bullshit. we have the highest rates of alcoholism lowest life expactencty. 2nd only to the crab fishermen in death at work.
I was feeling institutionalized. drinking raging bringing it home. anyhow aa is my affordable option. my dr has me on Xanax and Zoloft. if your in Leo how hard and long to it take you to go back in to the real world real world. I'm slowly decompressing. thanks to all have any of you guys got the aa route has it worked out.



Brother you're already setting yourself up to succeed so good for you. Without going into all the shit I'll do my utmost to keep this simple and to the point. Nobody knows the life of a CO except another CO. Nobody, not even Cops or most Administration. The crap in your head from behind those walls will pass, you have to believe that. You have to get off that poison the Doc's wanna throttle you with. Push yourself if you have to but be active and get out and do shit. You will handle this obstacle just like all the rest you've dealt with, by winning. You will purge that other world from your thoughts, decompress as you say, and carry on. It's what we do as men. You've got huge balls putting this out there which shows me you're serious about facing this and looking for support. Yes, this is an awesome place for it so you really can't go wrong. I'm telling you you're gonna be fine. I've been dealing with very bad men, women, and children for 28 yrs (8 Military 20+ and counting as a CO) and I've seen first hand the effects of it so you know I know. We're a loving bunch in here that would just assume cut a throat as place a bandage, and you know that. Keep us up to speed as how you're doing and what any of us may be able to do to help. No shame in reaching out and damn glad you made this move.

Be well, get off that shit, and focus on getting better and staying active. Better days are coming. That's a given. More power to ya Brother. You got this thing.;)

 
First, congratulations on making the decision. I self-medicated for years. One day I realized that 1) I had probably drunk a lifetime's allotment of booze, and 2) there was no way the woman I loved would marry a practicing drunk. It's been almost 34 years, now.

Second, you need a support person at home.

Third, it's a one-day-at-a-time (sometimes one-hour-at-a-time) battle, especially when you have a bad day. Frankly, there are days I think I'd run over little old ladies for few shots of booze.

I wish you the best of luck.

Richard
 
hey I think your both right. I have bad anxiety and depression. thats the disease the booze is the cure. it's the wrong one. but yeah it's a crutch. the benzos are half a pill when I feel the need to drink. not everyday. I have had benzos in the cabinet for quite awhile before this. I know not to fuck with them. my issues are pure alcohol probably not the right place to ask this it should probably be in the Leo forum. I just figured there were some guys with my background here. just the first time I've tried getting help I've stopped in long periods of the past. the funny thing is talking in front of a group makes me want to drink more than anything.

Man Im glad to hear that. I aint even been all the way down the rabbit hole, just dipped in the kiddie pool for a bit and it scared my wits outta me. Cant even properly explain the feeling... like constantly on the verge of a heart attack 1 million beats/minute, while scared of the outside world yet not really knowing why, feeling like others are conspiring against you, while feeling like youre in some alien world that doesnt seem real at all, and thats on the mild end of the spectrum..!! Benzos have to be the absolute #1 worst thing to be addicted to hands down. Makes even heroin look like childs play honestly.. no BS. On the upside tho it doesnt really have the psychological pull that more popular street drugs seem to have, but the physical symptoms from benzodiazepine w/d puts anything and everything else to shame. To the point that going cold turkey off of them will have permanent life altering affects(if you survive it) more often than not in serious cases.

Ask your doctor/research about Lyrica and Baclofen. That stuffs awesome. Think Lyrica is officially for nerve pain or something and AFAIK baclofen is specifically for alcoholics, both have a kinda similar action to benzos, maybe closer to gabapentin..?? Lyrica seems to have a more pronounced affect on mood uplift by far than benzos. Honestly Id think you could ditch the benzos and AD and replace with just Lyrica or Baclofen. Only tried lyrica once but I was impressed, never tried baclofen. Doesnt have the physical impairment that benzos do either, but yet feels great. Not sure if you ever tried Phenibut, but thats one Id really like to try. Its a legal.. supplement? Not sure what itd be considered but I know many people personally that like it, and use it for going to parties who dont want to drink. Also has a similar action to benzos/gabapentin/etc but obviously doesnt physically impair you much. If I had to guess, its probably kinda like getting the buzz effects of alcohol mentally yet not physically. Also good for insomnia and apparently is awesome for sex. Figured its something you could look into trying out occassionally for social events and what not where youll want an alternative to alcohol, 100% legal.. no prescription required, nothing. Obviously to be only be used occassionally, but definitely WAYY better than thinking its okay to pick up the booze again.

Any yall tried phenibut? Stuff sounds pretty cool from what buddies tell me. It was originally developed in Soviet Union for the cosmonauts to take while they were out orbiting the planet and such instead of shootin vodka. Forreal LOL..
 
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Congrats on healing yourself! I believe, as was stated earlier, that the mind is powerful. If you want to quit, then quit and don't look back. I was a full on drunk from 15yrs old til I was 35. One day I just said fuck it and stopped drinking. Nothing was going right. I had a heart to heart with God, just him and me. I did all of the talking. He showed me the way. I dumped the bullshit in my life, Stressors, freakshows and drama queens.. all gone. Don't let anybody tell you it's hard or it's gonna suck. If you try to wean yourself off, it only lengthens the detox process. It's what you make it. If you want to drink then you will end up drinking. If you want to quit then your entire life will be better. It's all about the habit of drinking. You will want to find a way to fill the void, but you have to control that and not trade addiction for addiction. I traded booze for food (good, raised, grown or killed by my own hands) and gained 60 lbs. Seriously though after a week you will find that you actually feel better, healthier and can sleep better. The hardest part for me was that the friends I thought I had were really just drinking buddies that didn't give a shit about me anyway. Hope that I can help in any way possible.
 
The hardest part for me was that the friends I thought I had were really just drinking buddies that didn't give a shit about me anyway. Hope that I can help in any way possible.

Yepper, anyone who says:

"Aw, com'on buddy, just one for old times sake."

Aint a friend. run.
 
Congrats on healing yourself! I believe, as was stated earlier, that the mind is powerful. If you want to quit, then quit and don't look back. I was a full on drunk from 15yrs old til I was 35. One day I just said fuck it and stopped drinking. Nothing was going right. I had a heart to heart with God, just him and me. I did all of the talking. He showed me the way. I dumped the bullshit in my life, Stressors, freakshows and drama queens.. all gone. Don't let anybody tell you it's hard or it's gonna suck. If you try to wean yourself off, it only lengthens the detox process. It's what you make it. If you want to drink then you will end up drinking. If you want to quit then your entire life will be better. It's all about the habit of drinking. You will want to find a way to fill the void, but you have to control that and not trade addiction for addiction. I traded booze for food (good, raised, grown or killed by my own hands) and gained 60 lbs. Seriously though after a week you will find that you actually feel better, healthier and can sleep better. The hardest part for me was that the friends I thought I had were really just drinking buddies that didn't give a shit about me anyway. Hope that I can help in any way possible.

ho lotta truth right here
 
Here's a different way of thinking about it. I quit both habits cold turkey. For each, I just decided one day that this shit was stupid and I didn't want to do it anymore. Looking at it this way really helped me follow through. I started drinking in 1975, quit in 2007, avg a 12 pack a day ($8). Started smoking in 1982, quit in 2009, average a pack a day ($2). That's a tad better than $113K. I drank and smoked a house, a really nice house.

Thank you,
MrSmith
 
Just a update im a month sober now. And that prison that was driving me to drink had a full blown riot a couple weeks back some officers got beat up pretty bad. Held hostage they probably did a millon in damage. I saw the writing on the wall. Life is looking up. Thanks to all
 
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Here's a different way of thinking about it. I quit both habits cold turkey. For each, I just decided one day that this shit was stupid and I didn't want to do it anymore. Looking at it this way really helped me follow through. I started drinking in 1975, quit in 2007, avg a 12 pack a day ($8). Started smoking in 1982, quit in 2009, average a pack a day ($2). That's a tad better than $113K. I drank and smoked a house, a really nice house.

Thank you,
MrSmith

I used to say something like that when offered cocaine.....

Sniff...oh that car was so good
Sniff, oh fuck that mortgage
Sniff, didnt need that job nohow
Sniff, to hell with the wife and kids
Sniff, honest judge, Ill do better.


NO thanks.
 
Don't know about alcohol but my 2 sons beat dope. It's a battle that takes years to heal from. My youngest was just short of OD'ing or committing suicide. Don't ever give up or give Satan the satisfaction of causing you to fail. Every day sober is another step in the right direction and gives your mind another day to heal. Keep it up and know you have my prayers for your success.
 
The big step you made is getting beyond the denial phase and recognizing you have a problem. Joining AA and getting a good sponsor is an important step and as mentioned above take it one day at a time. If you feel antidepressants or anti-anxiety drugs help only look at them as a short term treatment and have a plan to ween yourself at the earliest time you and your caregiver can agree upon. I have a very close family member who is now in her seventh year of sobriety and attends AA regularly. Her drug of choice is now Crossfit and works out six days a week and competes. Exercise does wonderful things for both your physical and mental well being. BTW this family member has a somewhat stressful job as an Assistant DA prosecuting crimes against children. Alcoholism is a disease and needs to be treated as such and in many cases there is a genetic tendency for the disease.
 
If your doctor just put you on Xanax and Zoloft, have your wife lock up the guns and knives for a bit. The first month going on and the first month going off.... It's a well known side effect that you get homicidal, suicidal, maniacal and loose your grip or reality easily, along with possibly having episodes of not knowing what you are doing.

Once your body gets used to the chemicals, you get back to normal.

Seriously, it's in the warnings for them.
The younger you are the worse the side effects can be.
 
If your doctor just put you on Xanax and Zoloft, have your wife lock up the guns and knives for a bit. The first month going on and the first month going off.... It's a well known side effect that you get homicidal, suicidal, maniacal and loose your grip or reality easily, along with possibly having episodes of not knowing what you are doing.

Once your body gets used to the chemicals, you get back to normal.

Seriously, it's in the warnings for them.
The younger you are the worse the side effects can be.
u
 
So just A update. I hit one year sober yesterday. Me and my 8 year old drank coffe and stayed up till 4:00 a.m. Watching old wrestle manias to celebrate. My life has changed so much do to the grace of god a amazing wife and family. Got a job i like. Still learning how to get better organized and be more productive and active. One day at a time. Thanks to you all for your support during my darkest time. I didnt know where to go who to talk to. This is the place i use the internet in a social context. It was easier to talk to folks with like interest. I had alot of good pms and support. Thanks to frank and the folks who make this place happen. And all the help
Justin E.
 
Praying for you boomer! Some very good advice above. Stay the course and you will be just fine! Get plenty of excercise as others have stated! Also spend atleast an hour a day doing something you love as well! Never had an alcohol or drug problem but depression and anxiety have been my enemy and I'm still fighting it every day! Best of luck brother!
 
Praying for you boomer! Some very good advice above. Stay the course and you will be just fine! Get plenty of excercise as others have stated! Also spend atleast an hour a day doing something you love as well! Never had an alcohol or drug problem but depression and anxiety have been my enemy and I'm still fighting it every day! Best of luck brother!
Just saw this was an old thread. Congrats on your recovery!
 
So just A update. I hit one year sober yesterday. Me and my 8 year old drank coffe and stayed up till 4:00 a.m. Watching old wrestle manias to celebrate. My life has changed so much do to the grace of god a amazing wife and family. Got a job i like. Still learning how to get better organized and be more productive and active. One day at a time. Thanks to you all for your support during my darkest time. I didnt know where to go who to talk to. This is the place i use the internet in a social context. It was easier to talk to folks with like interest. I had alot of good pms and support. Thanks to frank and the folks who make this place happen. And all the help
Justin E.

I know what you mean, I just went through a divorce myself and this place literally saved me. The genuine brotherhood that exists on this site is unique in my experience. Lots of damn good guys here willing to help who don't wanna see another brother suffer if they can do something about it.
 
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So just A update. I hit one year sober yesterday. Me and my 8 year old drank coffe and stayed up till 4:00 a.m. Watching old wrestle manias to celebrate. My life has changed so much do to the grace of god a amazing wife and family. Got a job i like. Still learning how to get better organized and be more productive and active. One day at a time. Thanks to you all for your support during my darkest time. I didnt know where to go who to talk to. This is the place i use the internet in a social context. It was easier to talk to folks with like interest. I had alot of good pms and support. Thanks to frank and the folks who make this place happen. And all the help
Justin E.
Congrats!
Welcome to the better rest of your life.

R
 
So just A update. I hit one year sober yesterday. Me and my 8 year old drank coffe and stayed up till 4:00 a.m. Watching old wrestle manias to celebrate. My life has changed so much do to the grace of god a amazing wife and family. Got a job i like. Still learning how to get better organized and be more productive and active. One day at a time. Thanks to you all for your support during my darkest time. I didnt know where to go who to talk to. This is the place i use the internet in a social context. It was easier to talk to folks with like interest. I had alot of good pms and support. Thanks to frank and the folks who make this place happen. And all the help
Justin E.

I feel bad that I hadn't seen the original post to offer you support, but you did get it from a lot of good guys !

Most importantly; Congratulations on your success ! :):):)