Maggie’s Best excuse you've told or heard given to a cop!

[steelman303]

Re: Best excuse you've told or heard given to a cop!

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Killer Spade 13</div><div class="ubbcode-body">That would be Watkinsville . . . </div></div>

Spade,..
You shoot around Athens/Watkinsville?

 

[chka]

Re: Best excuse you've told or heard given to a cop!

This won't be nearly as good as the rest.

Where I went to college was about 30 min away from home. At the time I was driving my parents old car. Now, my apartment was literally a single block away from the County S.O. and across the street from a court house. Headed off for a Friday night party and was trying to get to the store to pick up supplies before it closed. An off going unit was just about to pull into the station as we were passing it and I was going too fast and hit my brakes a little too hard to get away with it. The guy pulls me over and I get the usual "Where are you going? Is this your car?" So he takes my info and goes to run checks. Comes back not too long later and asks if I know Lance (my step-dad's brother) and I say "yeah, why?" The cop responds "Man I haven't seen that s.o.b. since high school hockey! Tell 'em I say hi, and slow it down for me" Got to the store on time and headed to the party.

Good start to that weekend.

 

[acloco]

Re: Best excuse you've told or heard given to a cop!

My true story, but I got a ticket....

Montana, BEFORE the "safe and prudent" speed limit, on the interstate. Had a rather nice small block in my Monte Carlo, that, when coupled with the 2.73 gears in the differential, allowed for some seriously high speed, for that size and aerodynamically insufficient body style.

I am travelling south on the interstate, about 10 at night. Of course, the MHP sit on top of the overpasses, so they can radar vehicles travelling in either direction. Sure enough, I got pulled over. Took almost 5 miles for the cop to catch up. I started slowing down when I saw the flashing lights turn on.

Officer asks the proverbial, "why did I stop you"...I replied, "speeding".

He explained the difference between speeding and warp speed. I asked how fast I was going, he replied, VERY fast.

He wrote multiple tickets - excessive speed (125+), wreckless driving, and driving too fast for conditions.

When we appeared in front of the judge, the judge asked me how fast I was going. My reply, "D". Judge questioned my response. I said the needle pointed to "D". Judge asked the officer how fast I was going. Officer replied, 125+. Judge advised, without knowing how fast I was going, by radar, then it could not be proven. Judge tossed the tickets...the MHP was just a little bit mad.

"D" in this car was 140. Radar guns at the time, would register up to 125.

 

[Killer Spade 13]

Re: Best excuse you've told or heard given to a cop!

Eatonton.

 

[Mike_in_FL]

Re: Best excuse you've told or heard given to a cop!

Not exactly what most replies have been, but never forgot this story.

I used to work with a retired sailor. I guess when he was a somewhat senior NCO in the Philipines they used to have to pull Shore Patrol, SP.

So one night they have to go to this bar, and it's small and to make matters worse everybody is crowded into a little room in the back away from the bar.

This becomes apparent when he walks in and gets a smell of the place. There is a passed out sailor seated on a stool at the bar in the ice cream uniform except the seat of the pants are all brown.

He said he stepped in next to the guy and put one arm over his in case the guy woke up swinging. He says to him, "Come on, wake up sailor, we got to get you back to the ship, you shit your pants."

He said the guy comes to, looks up at him and says "I know, but I ain't done yet."

 

[beretta_man11]

Re: Best excuse you've told or heard given to a cop!

My ability to tell stories sucks but I'll try-

10years ago, fresh out of high school I bought my first crotch rocket. since i'd been riding bikes most of my life, i felt comfortable enough to be stupid...
me and a buddy were easing through the middle of town on our bikes when we felt the urge to ride wheelies through the majority of town. about 4miles later two cops pull us over. they separated us and drilled us for about 30min. finally it got down to, WHY DID YOU DO THIS?!?! I told him i was just showing off to all the pretty ladies around. he laughed and told me to go home. that i did!

 

[athhud]

Re: Best excuse you've told or heard given to a cop!

I was leaving the bar one night (I was the DD) with 2 buddies. The local PD had a new officer fresh out of the Academy. The only "local" bar in my hometown is 15 miles outside of town and across the state line. The new guy parked his cruiser outside of the "jurisdiction" (which really means nothing down here) waiting to nail patrons leaving the bar DUI. Until the new guy showed up, there was never a worry about seeing a patrol car until you got to the city limits. So, on the way home I was cruising at ~85 in a 55. Well, I was pretty damn surprised when I rounded a curve to see the new guy parked on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere. I always cruise with a Valentine one radar detector and the local old timers never turn off their radar, so I was caught completely off guard when this guy didn't show up on the detector. Like any red-blooded American dumbass that had 6.1L of go under his right foot, I nailed it. I'd say I was easily 3/4 of a mile down the road before he even turned on his headlights. I never saw blue lights or heard a siren and that was my excuse when I was asked about it the next day. I told them that at 140mph I don't tend to look into the rear view mirror much. Turns out the poor kid put the patrol car into the ditch shortly after taking off after me. He still catches shit about it from the other officers (most of whom I am friends and/or on the VFD with). His brother busted me in another city shortly thereafter for illegal window tint. He spotted my Jeep in a bar parking lot and waited for me to leave. Fortunately I'm intelligent enough not to drive off while intoxicated. I was almost certain that I was getting a ticket, so I spent about 5 solid minutes rolling the window up and down for him to get the meter on it. I'd push the button all the way down to Auto so that they wouldn't stop half way. I got a kick out of it as did the ladies that were with me. Him, not so much. When he asked me whether or not I'd been drinking, I said "yep, sure have!". His face lit up like a kid on Christmas. Then I informed him that it was 2 beers about 4 hours ago. He didn't even bother with a field test, just wrote me the tint ticket and told me to go home. The ticket was thrown out after 3 court visits..... Since then, I've lent first guy a few tools to work on his AR with and he let me go on 55 in a 35 in December, so I guess the score is settled...... lol

 

[Ledzep]

Re: Best excuse you've told or heard given to a cop!

edit: google pic, not my fingernails

 

[waste_knot]

Re: Best excuse you've told or heard given to a cop!

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Ledzep</div><div class="ubbcode-body">

edit: google pic, not my fingernails

</div></div>
Thanks for clearing that up. I thought maybe you were trying to tell us the fingernail was your excuse.

 

[SavageLapua]

Re: Best excuse you've told or heard given to a cop!

 

[KE5MUJ]

Re: Best excuse you've told or heard given to a cop!

Pulled over for speeding one time.

Told the cop I had to take a monster shit and I didnt want to shit in the bar I came from. I got out of it.