PortaJohn

[Mwalex]

Trump Sentenced To Four Years Of Confinement In Small Oval Room In Washington D.C.

NEW YORK, NY — Following his felony conviction on 34 counts, former President Trump has officially been sentenced to four years of confinement in an oval-shaped cell in the heart of Washington, DC.

babylonbee.com

NEW YORK, NY — Following his felony conviction on 34 counts, former President Trump has officially been sentenced to four years of confinement in an oval-shaped cell in the heart of Washington, DC.

"Trump will begin serving his sentence on approximately January 20, 2025," announced news anchor Nichole Wallace. "An entire team of law enforcement officers dubbed 'Secret Service' will monitor Trump for the entire duration of his four-year sentence. In addition to being in an oval cell, Trump will be required to perform community service such as host heads of nations, sign bills into law, and pardon turkeys on Thanksgiving."

Legal experts state that Trump will be allowed to have visitors in the oval-shaped room, as well as access to a phone. "Four years is a long time for what's supposed to be a misdemeanor, but the people have spoken," said legal analyst John Carmichael. "Trump better get used to the idea of four years of hard time in a carpeted, oval room with oddly terrible furniture."


At publishing time, Trump had reportedly also been sentenced to a fine of negative fifty million dollars.

 

[Mwalex]

‘Welp, 250 Years Wasn't A Bad Run,' Says George Washington Looking On From Heaven

HEAVEN — Watching as the last vestige of the nation he helped found crumbled, George Washington sighed and remarked that America still had gone on a pretty solid two-hundred-fifty year run.

babylonbee.com

HEAVEN — Watching as the last vestige of the nation he helped found crumbled, George Washington sighed and remarked that America still had gone on a pretty solid two-hundred-fifty year run.

"Not bad, gentleman," said Washington to a few other Founding Fathers. "It's sad to see it end, but we had a pretty epic couple of centuries there."

As the United States breathed its last, Washington opined on what he and the other Fathers could have done differently. "Maybe we should have added a few more instructions, like, ‘No, seriously, you can't infringe on the Bill of Rights, you jackwagons," said Washington. "Perhaps a few notes on the absolute need to teach Judeo-Christian morality, not allowing anti-Christian cultists to have power, or the President needing a few functioning neurons. Oh, well. Hindsight and all that."


At publishing time, Washington had reportedly consoled himself by remembering that he wouldn't have to spend eternity with the people who'd destroyed his nation.

 

[Mwalex]

Banana Republics Starting To Feel Kinda Bad For United States

WORLD — Banana republics from across the globe have begun to feel a bit bad for the United States, and wondering if perhaps they ought to do something to help.

babylonbee.com

WORLD — Banana republics from across the globe have begun to feel a bit bad for the United States, and wondering if perhaps they ought to do something to help.

"It's sad. I mean we have sham trials here too, but at least we have bananas," said dictator Omar Carrillo. "I just really feel for them, you know?"

According to sources, several banana republics have begun to express concern that the corruption in America has gotten out of hand. "When we do show trials to destroy opposition candidates, we still charge them with crimes that at least exist. I mean, come on," said General Jose Cavazos. "We also at least pretend that justice was done, instead of just smirking at the press and walking away. That's so mean-spirited, right? We at least give our population false hope instead of just spitting in their faces."


At publishing time, the banana republics had decided to help America by sending troops to help monitor the election for fairness, and also a bunch of bananas.

 

[Mwalex]

Trump Reminds Media He Prefers The Term 'Justice-Impacted Individual'

U.S. — In the hours after being convicted on 34 counts of something or other, Trump issued a reminder to the media that the proper term to describe him is "justice-impacted individual."

babylonbee.com

U.S. — In the hours after being convicted on 34 counts of something or other, Trump issued a reminder to the media that the proper term to describe him is "justice-impacted individual."

The term, commonly used by Democrats and journalists to describe convicted felons, now describes a 2024 presidential candidate, giving Americans an exciting opportunity to vote for someone unfairly targeted by the U.S. justice system.

"I am a justice-impacted individual, possibly the most justice-impacted of any person in history," said Trump in a statement outside the New York courthouse. "This totally fake and phony Democrat witch-hunt conviction by 12 low-IQ haters and losers on the jury has made me a victim of a corrupt and bad system the likes of which the world has never seen before. It's so sad, very sad. Not good."


Trump urged the media to use the more sensitive updated term when referring to him, in solidarity with the millions of powerless American victims of an unjust system.

At publishing time members of the media confirmed they will continue to use their preferred term in Trump's case, which is "dangerous, bad, convicted, illegal felon-criminal with a stinky poopy face."

 

[Mwalex]

New York Prosecutor Says Nobody In America Is Above The Law He Made Up To Convict Them

NEW YORK, NY — Following the guilty verdict handed down against former President Donald Trump, New York Prosecutor Alvin Bragg used the case to issue a stern warning that nobody in America is above the law he made up to convict Trump.

babylonbee.com

NEW YORK, NY — Following the guilty verdict handed down against former President Donald Trump, New York Prosecutor Alvin Bragg used the case to issue a stern warning that nobody in America is above the law he made up to convict Trump.

Bragg's sobering statement came after he and his prosecution team successfully manufactured a case to convict Trump of a crime that remains unidentifiable by legal experts and served as a clear example of what will happen to other Americans if they brazenly run afoul of laws he makes up in the future.

"This is a nation of laws, and I'm the one who makes them up," Bragg said in a celebratory press conference following the Trump conviction. "Every American should think twice before violating the laws that I haven't made up yet, because once I make them up, they'll be held accountable for breaking the new laws they didn't know existed until I came up with them."


The case against Trump, which was unprecedented because Bragg hadn't yet made up the charges, sets a new bar to which all Americans must hold themselves. "Chances are, you're in violation of something," Bragg warned. "I don't know what law you're violating yet, exactly, but once I come up with what you've done wrong, you can be sure that you will all face the consequences."

At publishing time, Bragg was reportedly working closely with the Justice Department to compile a list of Trump supporters so that they could begin work on making up crimes for which they could be prosecuted and convicted.

 

[Mwalex]

'Intentional Misfeasance' Makes Trump Conviction Ripe For Reversal

'If I were the court of appeals, the moment this case came in, I would overturn the conviction,' von Spakovsky said.

thefederalist.com

Leftist District Attorney Alvin Bragg’s show trial delivered the Democrat Party’s dream: A felony conviction against their most hated political enemy.

The prosecution and the trial also were also littered with legal landmines and “reversible error” that should make former President Donald Trump’s looming appeal a slam dunk, legal experts say.

Historical and stunning but not surprising to many who have closely followed left-wing lawfare in recent years, the 12 angry Manhattan jurors after two days of deliberations found Trump guilty on all 34 trumped-up felony counts against him. Judge Juan Merchan has scheduled sentencing for July 11, just four days before the Republican National Convention is slated to begin in Milwaukee, where the GOP is poised to again nominate Trump as its presidential candidate. He will face President Joe Biden in the rematch of 2020’s mess of an election. Trump also is facing the possibility of spending the rest of his life in prison, depending on the vindictiveness of a New York judicial system that has already proved to be quite vindictive.

But the appeals process is certain to stall any sentencing, probably until after the election. And there is nothing currently stopping Trump from continuing his third presidential run, even with the kangaroo court felony conviction cheered on by his incumbent opponent.

 

[Mwalex]

Trump Haters See The Light, Contribute Cash After Sham Trial

'I know I'm not alone. We do not live in a Democracy anymore,' one former fence-sitter wrote on X following Thursday's show trial verdict.

thefederalist.com

When the guilty verdict came down Thursday afternoon in that Manhattan kangaroo court, the credit cards came out in support of former President Donald Trump.

Voters who said they had been on the fence about the GOP’s three-time presidential nominee, resisted him in the past, or had just never contributed to a political campaign are reaching for their wallets following the banana republic prosecution, trial, and verdict.

“I just made my first political donation in my entire life. Those that want to destroy this country left me NO CHOICE. Trump 2024,” Chandler Crump, who bills himself as a 19-year-old Billboard charting artist and freedom fighter, wrote on his X account.

 

[Mwalex]

‘They are the Gestapo’: AG Ken Paxton says his office was intimidated after he investigated FBI - LifeSite

Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton said the FBI ‘scared the heck’ out of his office after he attempted to initiate an investigation against the federal agency for violating the law.

www.lifesitenews.com

(LifeSiteNews) — Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton shared Tuesday that the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) retaliated against him after he tried to initiate an investigation against the agency “for violating state and federal law.”

Paxton told War Room host Steve Bannon that 3 1/2 years ago he received a referral from the Travis County district attorney to investigate the FBI and Department of Justice (DOJ) for breaking the law. Paxton was surprised to find after he began that process of investigation that the FBI knew about the referral before he did.

“They were already in my office threatening people and scaring the heck out of all of them,” said Paxton, adding that this is why there was a “coup” in his office.

He recounted how he was told by his head of law enforcement, including David Maxwell, that they could not investigate the FBI because it was “not possible for them to commit a crime.” Paxton said that when he approached his assistant, telling him that they had to fire Maxwell, only to have his assistant refuse.

“I said, ‘why?’ He said, because he threatened me. And he said, if I did what you want me to do, if I investigated them, they’re going to come after me. Like the FBI and Department of Justice are going to come after you,” Paxton recalled.

 

[Mwalex]

CNN senior legal analyst scorches 'ill-conceived' Trump case: 'A guilty verdict doesn’t make it all pure' · American Wire News

CNN senior legal analyst Elie Honig delivered a damning article about how prosecutors in the Trump case "contorted the law"

americanwirenews.com

In the many analyses that followed the guilty verdict handed down by a New York jury in the hush money trial of former President Donald Trump, there was one that was a surprise given the author’s connection to CNN.

The network’s senior legal analyst Elie Honig delivered a damning article about how prosecutors in the case “contorted the law” in order to get the conviction. Honig, a former assistant US Attorney, systematically took apart the case in what likely would upset leftists at his network where there was an atmosphere of celebration after the guilty verdict came down.

He blasted District Attorney Alvin Bragg, talked about the jury’s responsibility in deliberations and essentially gave a reality check to those ignoring the many breaches of the law and Constitution.

 

[Mwalex]

Homeless NYC thug on parole for assault arrested for punching elderly woman · American Wire News

A NYC thug who sucker punched a 72-year-old woman as she walked has been arrested, and he has a history of violence.

americanwirenews.com

A homeless man with a history of violence was arrested after he coldcocked an elderly woman in a random attack while he was on parole for another assault.

In the latest example of how people are at risk of becoming victims of violent predators in crime-ridden New York City, 29-year-old Mouhamed Diallo sucker punched a 72-year-old woman in the back of the head as she was walking.

The incident occurred on May 5 at around 4:50 p.m. at the corner of Fourth Avenue and 96th Street in Brooklyn, authorities said. After the unprovoked assault, the perp ran away as his victim lay on the ground bleeding. He was caught on surveillance video fleeing the scene.

Blacks doing black people shit

 

[Mwalex]

Boston mayor slammed for ‘reckless’ plan to give children as young as 11 and migrants voting power · American Wire News

A Dem. City Councilor ripped into Boston Mayor Michelle Wu for a plan giving illegal migrants' children the power to vote on the city budget.

americanwirenews.com

A Democrat city councilor is among the many voices condemning Boston’s Mayor Michelle Wu for her proposed process on voting powers.

City Councilor Ed Flynn ripped into Wu for her “tone-deaf” and “unserious” plan giving illegal migrants and children as young as 11 the power to vote on the city’s budget.

The Democrat expressed his “unequivocal and vehement opposition” to the plan in a letter to Renato Castelo, the director of the Office of Participatory Budgeting.

“During this time of great fiscal uncertainty — with a study warning that remote work policies and the city’s declining commercial property values may cost us $500 million in revenue annually, as well as a subsequent proposal to also tax commercial property at a higher rate — now more than ever, it is critical that we show the taxpayers of Boston that we take our financial responsibilities seriously,” Flynn wrote.

“Allowing children to decide the usage of taxpayer dollars would do just the opposite, and be viewed as tone-deaf, unserious, and wholly inappropriate by my constituents,” he added.

The city’s new voting process, which was approved by a ballot measure in 2021, goes into effect in July and will allow Bostonians to decide how to spend a portion of the city’s budget, the Boston Herald reported.

 

[Mwalex]

Democrat Urges Gov. Hochul to Pardon Trump for the Sake of 'Our Country'

townhall.com

Democrat Rep. Dean Phillips (D-Minn.) has called on New York Gov. Kathy Hochul (D) to pardon former President Donald Trump for the sake of the United States.

In a case brought by progressive District Attorney Alvin Bragg, a Manhattan jury found Trump guilty of all 34 counts of falsifying business records.

 

[Mwalex]

 

[Mwalex]

 

[Mwalex]

 

[Mwalex]

 

[theLBC]

worth watching

https://img.ifunny.co/videos/b7c00c9602f2603a6656bdd5c5a9b7a529011027cf20f32cb6284f4b6e253851_1.mp4

 

[theLBC]

 

[Mwalex]

 

[pmclaine]

https://x.com/libsoftiktok/status/1797082679470670060

 

[Bender]

STOP NOTICING GOY

 

[pmclaine]

STOP NOTICING GOY


View attachment 8430261

WTF?

 

[DuneBoer]

STOP NOTICING GOY


View attachment 8430261

 

[Gee Kay]

 

[pmclaine]

View attachment 8430260

https://x.com/libsoftiktok/status/1797082679470670060

Posted that elsewhere in a discussion group that is mostly mil/prior mil.

Some dude, probably a SEAL, took offense and said I should stop posting unsubstantiated BS from Twitter as fact and than posted a link to the NSW website which has no evidence of this message.

That’s legit - Libs of Tik Tok, James O’Keefe and Babylon Bee are just as likely to be running out of the same CIA office making the pride poster in the first place.

Anyway another member in that conversation posted the NSW Facebook page proudly displaying their PRIDE post.

There is no way the powers that be wouldn’t have NSW/SF/MARSOC/AFPJ not go to their knees for this propaganda/demoralization purpose.

 

[theLBC]

 

[theLBC]

 

[theLBC]

 

[theLBC]

don't they realize that's just how our military industrial complex works?

Retired 4-Star Admiral Arrested in 'Triple-Digit Millions' Navy Contract Bribery Scheme

redstate.com

At the meeting, the charged defendants allegedly agreed that Burke would use his position as a Navy Admiral to steer a sole-source contract to [Jump Start] in exchange for future employment at the company. They allegedly further agreed that Burke would use his official position to influence other Navy officers to award another contract to [Jump Start] to train a large portion of the Navy with a value Kim allegedly estimated to be “triple-digit millions.”

maybe it is encouraging to see somebody get "caught", but these companies should never be allowed any contracts ever again..

 

[theLBC]

Just How Bad ARE They?! Jonathan Turley DROPS DOJ for 'Legally ABSURD' Claim on Biden/Hur Tapes (Thread)

twitchy.com

 

[theLBC]

 

[armorpl8chikn]

Just How Bad ARE They?! Jonathan Turley DROPS DOJ for 'Legally ABSURD' Claim on Biden/Hur Tapes (Thread)

twitchy.com

Nothing is real.....
Unless we say its real.

 

[armorpl8chikn]

You know who.....

 

[37L1]

You know who.....

Amish again?

 

[armorpl8chikn]

Amish again?

Hell yes.
Fucking whisker crackas.

 

[Rthur]

Nothing is real.....
Unless we say its real.

R

 

[DuneBoer]

Posted that elsewhere in a discussion group that is mostly mil/prior mil.

Some dude, probably a SEAL, took offense and said I should stop posting unsubstantiated BS from Twitter as fact and than posted a link to the NSW website which has no evidence of this message.

That’s legit - Libs of Tik Tok, James O’Keefe and Babylon Bee are just as likely to be running out of the same CIA office making the pride poster in the first place.

Anyway another member in that conversation posted the NSW Facebook page proudly displaying their PRIDE post.

There is no way the powers that be wouldn’t have NSW/SF/MARSOC/AFPJ not go to their knees for this propaganda/demoralization

 

[NoDopes]

Just How Bad ARE They?! Jonathan Turley DROPS DOJ for 'Legally ABSURD' Claim on Biden/Hur Tapes (Thread)

twitchy.com

Current AI is not advanced enough to replicate Biden's talking or walking.

 

[Beefmanne]

View attachment 8430418

Did he invent Frog Lube?

 

[Schütze]

View attachment 8430260

https://x.com/libsoftiktok/status/1797082679470670060

View attachment 8430418

IF this is true, we are definitely doomed…. I just wish you guys do enough research before posting this. Maybe you have…. Don’t know these days.

 

[DuneBoer]

IF this is true, we are definitely doomed…. I just wish you guys do enough research before posting this. Maybe you have…. Don’t know these days.

Navy's first openly gay SEAL builds his life anew

For years, Brett Jones lived a double life.

www.latimes.com

https://abcnews.go.com/Blotter/accidental-love-derailed-gay-navy-seals-career/story?id=22485307

Father, husband and first openly gay Navy SEAL: 6 questions with Alabamian Brett Jones

Brett Jones was born into a military family, spending his childhood traveling around the world. He continued the tradition through service as a Navy SEAL, all the while knowing he was gay.

www.al.com

Ex-Navy SEAL says CIA abandoned him in the Afghan desert for being gay

Brett Jones, 41, filed a complaint against the federal agency, saying he was forced to endure homophobic slurs, comments and the 120-degree desert heat because of his sexuality.

www.dailymail.co.uk

https://sofrep.com/author/brett-jones/

Brett Jones | HuffPost

www.huffpost.com

More?

 

[theLBC]

 

[Longshot231]

Navy's first openly gay SEAL builds his life anew

For years, Brett Jones lived a double life.

www.latimes.com

https://abcnews.go.com/Blotter/accidental-love-derailed-gay-navy-seals-career/story?id=22485307

Father, husband and first openly gay Navy SEAL: 6 questions with Alabamian Brett Jones

Brett Jones was born into a military family, spending his childhood traveling around the world. He continued the tradition through service as a Navy SEAL, all the while knowing he was gay.

www.al.com

Ex-Navy SEAL says CIA abandoned him in the Afghan desert for being gay

Brett Jones, 41, filed a complaint against the federal agency, saying he was forced to endure homophobic slurs, comments and the 120-degree desert heat because of his sexuality.

www.dailymail.co.uk

https://sofrep.com/author/brett-jones/

Brett Jones | HuffPost

www.huffpost.com

More?

So Petty Officer Peter Puffer claims he was bullied and harassed cause he is a sexual deviant. That's cause normal people don't like Peter Puffers.

And that' the problem with the sodomites. They want the rest of the world to change for them. Normal people don't like them or want them around.

Regardless of the propaganda and legislation changes, normal people will never accept these faggots. Maybe his life would be better if he gave up his life of sodomy.

 

[theLBC]

worth a listen and share. i believe her.

 

[NoDopes]

Dry run... Nov 3.

 

[theLBC]

 

[7.62willdo]

So Petty Officer Peter Puffer claims he was bullied and harassed cause he is a sexual deviant. That's cause normal people don't like Peter Puffers.

And that' the problem with the sodomites. They want the rest of the world to change for them. Normal people don't like them or want them around.

Regardless of the propaganda and legislation changes, normal people will never accept these faggots. Maybe his life would be better if he gave up his life of sodomy.

Chief ass queef…..to you sir

 

[theLBC]

 

[Doc68]

We need to start doing the same. We are losing/have lost our country without as much as a shot fired or protest on the scale that others have done.

You know, the moral high road as we say......

Doc

 

[Doc68]

It's Akron......I always fail to see diversity in these videos.....weird right?

Doc