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Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS STORY)

N

nock

Sergeant
Full Member
Minuteman
Feb 26, 2003
585
1
Fort Worth, Texas USA
#1
Shanksters' friend Rachel invited him to go to the lake for the day with her family. Rachel thought Shanksters was fun to be around — plus he was cute. Rachel really hoped he'd say yes.

Shanksters turned Rachel down. He liked Rachel, too, but was self-conscious about taking off his T-shirt. He worried that her family and others at the lake would see what he saw when he looked in the mirror — a scrawny excuse for a man. Shanksters hadn't gone to the pool in more than a year because he was so self-conscious about his appearance.

(PLEASE ADD TO THIS STORY)
 
#3
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS STORY)

But then Shanx got to pumping iron (not to mention the ho's) and beefed up that skinny frame into a physique that would make even Charles Atlas would step back and say......"
 
#7
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

After several months of hard work shank managed to develop an appendage that rivaled Shane Diesel. With a new found level of confidence he invited a team of extra heavy women over for a night of.......
 
#9
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

....extreme barbeque and clam baking. Shanksters ho's ate the county clean out of ribs, chittlins, grits and all those other southern food groups. Suddenly a loud explosion occurred that measured a 6 on the richter scale....
 
#13
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: atreeman</div><div class="ubbcode-body">....extreme barbeque and clam baking. Shanksters ho's ate the county clean out of ribs, chittlins, grits and all those other southern food groups. Suddenly a loud explosion occurred that measured a 6 on the richter scale.... </div></div>
After eating everything in sight the biggest of the sweat hogs had no choice but to dip shank in gravy and consume him. Once in the bowels of the beast shank lit a match to see. BOOM! The methane lit and out came shank flying at mach 2
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: wnroscoe</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Mean while back on Shanksters ship the "USS Whaler" a cry from below..........."man the harpoon captain I see a......" </div></div> man covered in two tons of shit flying right at us.
 
#14
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

Shankster's Mermaid Ho was looking pretty cute after being
at sea for many a months.

28rikk6.jpg
 
#15
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

Sadly Shankster's poor vision due to pupils being fatiged from looking for love had mistaken Barney Frank (trying to capture an unsuspecting manchild) for his newfound conquest. What was our Hero to do?? ...............................................
 
#16
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

Just in the nick of time one of Shankster's ex-girlfriends appeared. She was never shown in any of Shankster's previous posts as Google Earth doesn't have a wide enough field of view to capture her in a single frame. None the less, Barney Frank was well within her event horizon and he was sucked into her black hole (which incidentally used to be Shanks favorite place on Earth)....
 
#18
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

Fearing LowLight would find out and ban forever the immortal Shankster to the bowels of Hell he devised a most unscrupulous Mall Ninja attack to be perpetrated ....................
 
#19
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

A competition, pitting The Shank directly against his arch nemisis the Fuhrer, in a life or death struggle ....
 
#21
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

Fuhrer who was an evil master of the underworld mall ninjas, prepared for years within his dark temple to fight the infamous Shankster. He conspired a plan beyond anything anyone had even dreamt of. The days grew closer until the time was right when Fuhrer left the underworld in search of his nemesis. On the mountain of Nifta Machita the evil Fuhrer found Shankster. Instead of fighting Shankster ran down the mountain with inhuman speed. He ran to where the two valleys met forming a ravine with rock walls on each side towering high above him. Fuhrer followed only to find Shankster had given up. He stood watching as the evil Fuhrer approached with his sword drawn. Small pebbles began to fall as Fuhrer looked up on the rock walls only to see three to six hundred pound women falling naked towards him.
 
#23
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

Yes, as Shanksters entourage of Special Forces Recon Plus Sized women crushed the life out of the Fuhrer one could hear the Shankster laugh insanely.....
 
#27
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

man i have to peeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHH, which one of you big bitches gave shankster the burning drippy dick? then it struck him...BARNEY!!!!!
 
#29
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

Calbash, reserved for smokin' his Funkie Monkie Wacky Tabakkie...

Failing to locate a valid ignition source, he was forced to resort to...
 
#30
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

the volcanoes of Hawaii.... where he lit up and enjoyed his afternoon. But he looked down as he was noticing he was uncomfortable only when he sat down. He checked in the mirror and noticed something growing from his backside. It was a talking tumor and he named it......
 
#31
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

Little Shank. Little Shank was a two foot tumor with a small patch of hair on his head. At first Shankser was freaked out by the talking little freak but when he tried to cut it off it screamed and begged for it's life to be spared. Shankter agreed to sparing the life of the tumor in the event the tumor could offer him...........
 
#32
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

love advice. He asked Little Shank how it had all come to this. This mad world of penis pumps, exploding mermaids, Barney Frank, mall ninjas, the Fuhrer and a gang of man crushing whores. He had set out to gain the love of a woman....Rachel. "How had it all come to this and what should I do", he asked Little Shank. Little Shank gave him a sobering look and said.........
 
#33
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

You need to lose 10 pounds of ugly fat....cut of your head....
 
#34
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

Shankster had had enough of his little friend and without second thought cut it lose from his body. The creature fell to the ground in a violent shake then bled to death. One of Shanksters ex-girlfriends donated some fatty tissue to heal his wounds so that he wouldn't meet the same fate as his tumor.......
 
#35
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

he repaid the favor by cleaning off his fat savior with his tongue! Then he got food poisoning from the uneaten chicken wings she was hiding under her fat rolls.
 
#39
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Emilio</div><div class="ubbcode-body">and a watch </div></div> ......................................... it looked like a watch but as has often happened to our hapless hero it was a time navigator. Once around his wrist the sky darkened and he was reverted to his last day of innocence. Now he had the choice to change all that had transpired or continue as he had done in the past. Sweat began to bead on his brow as the decision was looming to be made. To his left he felt peering eyes burning into his soul and could smell the stench as the 969lb love monster came waddling at high speed towards him. Without a thought he hit the stem and was teleported to ..................................................................................
 
#40
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

to 1969... June 28th. the day the stonewall riots began, Shankster was thrown into the depths of Americas first all homosexual riot. (History Here)

seeing a very large group of pissed off men in leather walking towards him, Shankster said......
 
#44
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

... coerced the Pittsburgh Steelers fan into slowly lowering her massive backside onto his face.

qb4o.jpg
 
#45
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Veer G</div><div class="ubbcode-body">... coerced the Pittsburgh Steelers fan into slowly lowering her massive backside onto his face.

qb4o.jpg
</div></div>

<span style="font-weight: bold">Shank would hit...</span>
 
#47
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: shankster</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Veer G</div><div class="ubbcode-body">... coerced the Pittsburgh Steelers fan into slowly lowering her massive backside onto his face.

qb4o.jpg
</div></div>

<span style="font-weight: bold">Shank would hit...</span> </div></div>

Well, it <span style="font-style: italic">is</span> the broad side of a barn, isn't it?
 
#49
Re: Shanksters daily life. (PLEASE ADD TO THIS ST

...and Shank did valiantly attempt to hit, but got the folds confused under pressure and ended up tagging her in the belly button, triggering...
 
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