So when do you start looking?

Vagina is a hell of a drug man. Makes a man loose his wisdom and repeat the same thing over and over. My wife could make me mad as hell and if she offers I’m a changed man and ready to go!

Oh the other hand you can’t fault someone for not wanting to be alone after going thru divorce.

As you get older, pussy becomes less important. When your life partner figures that out, they start to become downright pleasant........36 years and counting.

Me ? A good deuce every morning counts for bee’s knees.......
 
Oh the other hand you can’t fault someone for not wanting to be alone after going thru divorce.
As you get older, pussy becomes less important. When your life partner figures that out, they start to become downright pleasant........36 years and counting.

Me ? A good deuce every morning counts for bee’s knees.......

Get a couple Big dogs like hounds that like to hang around and cuddle. You won't need no stinking woman to keep you company.
Add a bit of free internet "Adult Entertainment" and you are good to live life without the daughters of Satan.
 
Cause porn is not from Satan? Hahaha

Doc
Sorry buddy. Been there, done that, dont really like the Tshirt.

Came out on top in the end though.
Depends on your state how things go as far as property and financial settlements.
I lucked out here in CO.
I do agree to sell all “your” stuff to a buddy you trust for cheap and have as much cash you “wasted on booze and lap dances” stored where it cant be found (not a safe deposit box).

Track through the wireless records.
Plug in a tracker to the ODB port on her car.
Track her phone if you can (easy if on same bill).
Knowing helps a guy be more certain.

Feel your pain man. It blows.
 
36 years, that’s an awesome achievement!

Been with mine since I was old enough to legally buy a rifle. Married for 6 years. With little ones now so it’s interesting at times!

So what’s the secret for making thru the hard times? I’d say with 36 years there had to been a hard time or two...

No secrets. Sometimes it means swallowing your own pride. Yeah, we’ve had our tough times. But we’re also well past the point of realizing that the value of commitment and loyalty to each other is far more important than individual egos. We had to learn that as we got older. Both of us are truly blessed. I type this response while sitting next to my bride at MPLS ready to depart to Amsterdam/Schipol for a 3 week European holiday. The grass is as green as it will ever get on my side of the fence ?
 
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Get a couple Big dogs like hounds that like to hang around and cuddle. You won't need no stinking woman to keep you company.
Add a bit of free internet "Adult Entertainment" and you are good to live life without the daughters of Satan.

We had Newfies when we were younger and didn’t travel. We were always there for them. We desperately want a Berner, but just aren’t home enough to take care of one. I friggin’ love big dogs...... (y) (y) (y)
 
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#1- hire the best divorce lawyer in your area.
#2- make appointments and go see every other divorce lawyer in your area. If they have seen you, they cannot work for her.
#3- do not go through anything of hers. Hire a good private investigator to do that. You need to act clueless. Let the P.I. get all the dirt they can.
 
Geez some of you fuckers have lived 3 lives. Married to the same woman for 26 years.

I have had a couple friends who went through divorce. Thought their wife's were "cool" until then. Then damn turned to total bitches.

Best of luck to you. Read through this thread and you will see one guy lost is own baby pictures. That is fucked up, but that is what it becomes.

If it means something to you she will want it.

My cousin got a divorce. I thought is wife was cool as fuck. Then one day she had enough. Which my cousin agrees he was probably not a good husband.

She shows up one day with some papers to sign. Everything had been amicable to that point. She claimed they were stuff for the kids school, stuff for health insurance. Just a bunch of every day normal stuff.

But turns out in the middle of the stack was one her lawyer had written up, that said he waved all rights to his children.

When he found out THEN he got a lawyer and went to court. Judge said "tough shit, read before you sign".

He did not see his boys for 3 years, until she finally got over the divorce.

Neither ever cheated, and she is the one that filed for divorce. She basically thought he was shit for not helping around the house. Think about that. She got upset because he was lazy around the house (but worked 12hrs a day and provided very well for them) so she had enough and said I want out. And that was not enough to satisfy her feelings of betrayal so she took the kids from him.

When it comes to divorce people loose their ever fucking minds.

I was pissed that she used the children as pawns. You want out, fine. Dont fuck with the kids heads.
 
Figure out how to get her to be all "woke" and "progressive" by becoming a Muslim and moving to Saudi...
Then get a divorce in a country where men aren't ruled by women.
 
Anyone that weaponizes a child is more worthless than a communist.
Oh man. There goes my blood pressure

Then they let their new "boyfriend" abuse the children while they spend the father's hard earned "child support" money on drugs and alcohol.
Because for some reason courts have decided it would be wrong to ever try to ensure "child support" is actually spent on the child.

Basically evil women these days use children as a net to make men slaves to support their evil lust for being daughters of Satan.
The courts are fully in on it. It's all about making men slaves and using women to destroy all that is good in society.
 
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Plain and simple. If she keeps her phone on silent, ALWAYS leaves it face down, and never leaves a room without it? You need start getting your shit together.

I know these things because that is what I done for the most of my life. Yes I am aware I was a POS. If you want to know all the tricks to the trade just ask. Sadly I have some experience in this field.
 
Is it too soon for Jody memes @doc88 :)?

I was the only single squad leader in my platoon and got to give all the divorce/ pick me up talks to the privates who didn't take my advice and married the strippers from Dejavou outside the B street gate at Carson then were all depressed when they found out she was still working hard on the side and making money off guys in a rival platoon... Got some epic stories.... Anyway

I know it's hard man but the sun rises tomorrow. Protect yourself now but also talk to her if you value the relationship but be ready for the worst.
 
Take it from me, if it's gonna happen, then make sure you pull the trigger. Good advice liquidating EVERYTHING but do it BEFORE filing. That way if it's a community property state and you sell everything for $1 to your buddy, then half of that is just fifty cents.

If I were you I'd get a PI if it's possible and let them find out. They do that thing all the time, hell, I bet it's 90% of the job. Then if you do find something, don't say anything until you liquidate it all and get receipts, then I guess ambush her ass like my ex did me.
 
My parents were married for over 40 years but my dad gave me a piece of sound advise one time; he said that women are like a MTD bus, wait 15 minutes and another one will be by!

I am on my second marriage but 15 years in and we are still best friends and doing great. Just remember they are all crazy, just some hide it better than others!
 
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Consult with the top 5 divorce attorneys in your area. Pick one, just in case. Then ask her outright or do what snooping you need to do to confirm or deny your suspicion.

If it's nothing, no harm, no foul. If its something, she can't put any of those attorneys on retainer, as it would be a conflict of interest for them, after hearing specifics of your side of the case.

IMHO, it shouldn't matter if it's your 10th. Divorce sucks (trust me, I know), but nowhere near as bad as constantly living in that kind of stress and pain.

Make the harder decision and do what's best for your wellbeing. And for what it's worth, I'm sorry you're having to deal with that.
 
Op, your wife just told me that she’s not messing around. ?

Hi,

Do you want to compare analytical data on that subject, lolol...

FYI: There are a few satellite services you can "rent" on a day by day basis to track her if you would like. Nothing would make a Judge sit back in his/her chair and just gasp at satellite images/video of the wife "doing her thing".

Sincerely,
Theis
 
Having peace is priceless... I went thru a nasty divorce but I’m clean on the other side... if your thinking of checking her phone your gut is checking up with u ...hire a good PI and let them find the dirt it can be very expensive but the good ones don’t come cheap, the judge in my case just rolled his eyes at all my evidence because it wasn’t bought and paid for... BEST OF LUCK
 
I am not as experienced as several of you. I have only had 1 wife for the last 30 years. 3, 4 different marriages? That just sounds like way too much work.

My personal take is trust matters if things are going to last. We went through a long-- nearly 8 year --period where that was lacking on both sides. She snooped through my stuff (car, truck, phone, desk, etc.) rather than talking to me and it drover her frigging nuts. I took a different approach and asked questions. Most of the time I was not satisfied with attitude or answers, but it kept things moving in the right direction. Then one day a particular event happened and we both knew exactly where things were at. Nothing along the lines of screwing around, but it took another year before the trust was back to full-on mutual. Now, things are fantastic.

My point is there are times when marriage is grueling as hell. If you figure out how to work together to move in the same direction eventually you split the load you are carrying, then together you realize what you can jettison (all the 'mood' and human individuality BS that we all project at times) to make that load even lighter. If either party is not willing, and I am talking not willing period not necessarily willing right this minute, then it was probably a mistake to begin with.

Before you check the phone ask yourself what you are going to do if you do or don't find anything. If you don't find anything you still need to get to the bottom of whatever put that question in your head to begin with. If you do find something, you need to know going in if you are doing it to end it, or as a tool to try and fix it. In either case you are giving her a reason to not trust you. Regardless of what she has or has not done, a lasting marriage takes trust and broken trust is really hard to fix. I am pretty sure you are already well aware of that.
 
Cause porn is not from Satan? Hahaha

Have you checked out the Motivational Pictures threads since like the beginning of the site here HA!
Probably about 75% of the posts could be classified as soft versions of adult inspirational material.....;)
Porn may be from Satan but it if so, it seems to be one of the more popular sins these days.
Much like you may not eat pork because it's unclean, but bacon... well it's bacon... you can't not have bacon....
 
Plain and simple. If she keeps her phone on silent, ALWAYS leaves it face down, and never leaves a room without it? You need start getting your shit together.

Another one I have seen happen is the wife gets one of her other girlfriends to get her a separate phone billed to the girlfriend and in the girlfriend's name and then they use that for all the sexting & naked pictures they are sending to the person they are cheating or planning on cheating with.....
 
Another one I have seen happen is the wife gets one of her other girlfriends to get her a separate phone billed to the girlfriend and in the girlfriend's name and then they use that for all the sexting & naked pictures they are sending to the person they are cheating or planning on cheating with.....
The ole burner phone trick. Nice.
 
I would suggest moving things you do not want to loose over to someone you really trust before filing or thinking of divorce for there protection you will loose 1/2 of your stuff in a divorce if your male at best . more after she gets a good attorney at your expense . and for the love of god good luck and do not freak out as hard as it may be go jogging punch a tree not her you will cost yourself more money , loss of everything down to the penny if you freak out on her . even if she is having your best friends kid Its not worth jail time over .your life is not over even if the relationship may be . good luck and best wishes . you could just try communication and talk to her see how she feels even if it is just to listen to a 4 hr rant on how bad you are , or what you did wrong , you could get a much larger picture on where you stand .
This. Move ALL of your shit to a friend's house, possibly sign a bill of sale for the items so she can't take your shit I've seen it work.
 
My longest childhood friend and his wife are getting divorced. They both tell me, independently, how they found stuff on each other's phone's and say to me, "Wasn't he/she just such a jerk? You know what I found him/her doing?"

Of course that kind of pot-calling-the-kettle-black moral relativism can only come from rabid liberals.

The first post nailed it like no first post has ever nailed it before. If you have to ask, it's pretty well over.

-Stooxie
 
If you can’t trust the person you’re with, married or not, you’re wasting your time w/ that person. I absolutely trust my wife to go out w/ friends, etc & I don’t bother to ask where she’s been. If you have to ask there’s a problem.

I’ve been w/ my wife for almost 23 years so I can’t even begin to tell you about divorce. Not that there’s never been a rough patch or two. Hell, we’re still human.

*Someone once told me that the secret to a long lasting marriage is both people don’t want a divorce at the same time.

**Whatever happens, don’t whoop anyone’s ass. For one, no woman is worth fighting over. Two, I’m sure you don’t need a DV conviction & loss of your 2A Rights.
 
Gotta ask yourself a few things:

If you found out, would you leave? If not, don’t look.

Do you need to be absolutely sure? If not, don’t look.

What if you find out you’re just being paranoid? Would you be able to revert back to trusting? If not, don’t look and leave.

Is the relationship salvageable in any scenario? If so, proceed to those steps without looking as that’s just going to complicate things.

If you absolutely need to know before moving to the next step, go for it. If not, what’s the best that can happen, you find out she’s running around? Then what, you feel bad about yourself and punch the wall?
 
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Work on communication first. Might be tough, but act simple direct questions about what's going on in your head. It's your wife... not just some girl you're dating. Everything should be open and honest between you two. If she lies about things and you figure it out though, end it or get counseling if you BOTH feel like it's worth salvaging.
 
I bought a 'cell phone', and gave it to My Lady. Simply because she wanted one, and felt it was 'safer' for her to have one. I kinda get that, for when she's driving by herself. Myself, I can't stand the damn things, and refuse to be like so many others, led through life by their thumbs.

I used to have friends come over to visit, and in the middle of our conversations (face to face) they'd be whipping out their phones from their 'holsters' and checking what someone else said, and replying to THAT conversation.

I draw/drew the line there. There's a shelf by the door for people to leave their phone when they enter. Pick it up as you leave. NOT that hard of a concept to grasp, is it?

As to 'her' cell phone, I don't care because I trust her implicitly and have no reason to suspect otherwise. Add to that, on the (extremely) rare occasion when she's out with a friend or friends, I only ask her to wake me up when she gets home, to let me know she's home. I only ask 'where there any problems?' and 'would you do it again'? The answer is always "No and Yes"....

I trust her with my life and effort, and she trusts me with her life and effort. Teamwork is a mutual agreement and a lifelong commitment.

Anything else is just situational. Establish what marriage means to a person, before committing to that person in marriage.
 
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When are enough warning signs to warrant looking through her phone.
Any kids with her?

To be honest with you ( I hope I am reading your question wrong ) but the way I'm reading it is that you are considering surreptitiously inspecting her phone. Unless you suspect her of being involved with terrorists, I'm having trouble envisioning what you might find that would be a graver offense on her part than the offense you are considering.

If you have minor kids with her then communicate with her and attempt to solve problems.

No Kids, follow your gut, just don't end up the dirtbag sifting through spousal phones and emails.... I used to work with a guy who came to work one day and told us that he had discovered his wife was cheating when he pulled her panties out of the dirty laundry and sniffed cum stains on them. Do you want to be that guy?
 
I bought a 'cell phone', and gave it to My Lady. Simply because she wanted one, and felt it was 'safer' for her to have one. I kinda get that, for when she's driving by herself. Myself, I can't stand the damn things, and refuse to be like so many others, led through life by their thumbs.

I used to have friends come over to visit, and in the middle of our conversations (face to face) they'd be whipping out their phones from their 'holsters' and checking what someone else said, and replying to THAT conversation.

I draw/drew the line there. There's a shelf by the door for when they enter. Pick it up as you leave. NOT that hard of a concept to grasp, is it?

As to 'her' cell phone, I don't care because I trust her implicitly and have no reason to suspect otherwise. Add to that, on the (extremely) rare occasion when she's out with a friend or friends, I only ask her to wake me up when she gets home, to let me know she's home. I only ask 'where there any problems?' and 'would you do it again'? The answer is always "No and Yes"....

I trust her with my life and effort, and she trusts me with her life and effort. Teamwork is a mutual agreement and a lifelong commitment.

Anything else is just situational. Establish what marriage means to a person, before committing to that person in marriage.

My best friend has a metal box outside his door for every one to deposit their cell phone before they come into his house. The box has an outlet so they can charge if needed.
 
My best friend has a metal box outside his door for every one to deposit their cell phone before they come into his house. The box has an outlet so they can charge if needed.

I seriously considering this. I fucking hate people enough at it is; nothing is more annoying than them on their fucking phone while at my house. If you're here, you're here for a fucking reason, and its not to look at your fucking phone.

I also don't respond to any kind of business being conducted via text; just flat out stopped replying to it. Texting is for kids and women gossping about bullshit. You want to talk about setting up a meeting, a scope of a project, pricing or anything else thats pertinent, you fucking call me or we meet in person.
 
Asynchronous communication can have a lot of uses when spanning different parties with different schedules, time zones or when one party can't talk at the moment.

But for setting up a project, pricing etc., I find proper e-mails much better than trying to do everything in a call. Much less room for errors or misunderstanding.

Group texts as well as group e-mails can be a great way for small groups to stay in touch (with just every day stuff) when it would be impossible to get even part of them on the phone at the same time due to schedules / time zones / work etc.

Then when you get your multi tasking done even better, you can be talking on the phone with someone while replying to e-mails and keeping up with a texting session. Hook your cell phone up to a keyboard and a second keyboard for your computer & another phone to talk on, and you'll be amazed how much you can get done at once.
 
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Been reading through this thread and it has been extremely interesting, nice to see a lot of us here are not scared to be open and talk about this, so many of us have been there. The Lies of a woman can drive a man completely crazy. A woman can swear, cry and have a full emotional breakdown and still be lying. i have been through one divorce and it was because i checked her phone, it had finger print security... She had to much to drink out day and fell deep into sleep. i could unlock her security and check her conversations with her female friend...(Yes, Conversation with her female friends is where the juicy stuffs is)... and i found all sorts of Dick sucking chat with another dude. and that was it. She didn't take much from me. She is broke and has broken up with the guy she was seeing. its very funny how women would have the world and destroy it all. i used to take her on trips and i protected her.

If your guts tell you to check her phone then go for it, if nothing is found then you will trust and love her more.