This is the first warm weather since the ex got on her broom and flew off, freeing up an enormous amount of funds previously earmarked for shoes. I was now able to reallocate the funds towards guns and motorcycles. I made a grievous error in judgment by riding through a well-known speed trap on my new 2021 BMW R 1250RT. Due to my filling my old leather riding jacket out more than I used to, I decided to carry my FN FNX on the outside in a cool holster that I found. I was aware that there was a slight possibility that this could potentially draw unwanted attention from any passing constabulary. I did not anticipate people calling the fuzz reporting a "crazed biker with a gun!". I never thought of myself as crazed, eccentric perhaps but never crazed. Choosing comfort over common sense triggered a series of events resulting in an hour of cooling my butt (literally) sitting on the curb in handcuffs on an entrance ramp to I75. I'm quite sure my picture can be found on numerous Facebook walls as it seemed like every 3rd car had someone snapping pictures of my happy a$$ with their smartphone. I had been snagged by a rural peace officer who was driving an ancient Crown Vic. It was one of those towns that have no population and only exists because it annexed the nearby freeway onramp/offramp.
After the county sheriff and state police were called in to assist, they all agreed that there was no law in Ohio against openly carrying a handgun while on a motorcycle, doing handstands, running backward, or any other means of locomotion. The speed trap then tried to do what speed traps do by attempting to issue me a citation for speeding. I pointed out that he had not stopped me for speeding or any other traffic offense and that he had admitted that to the other two cops, who were still standing there. That went around for a while until I was begrudgingly let go without squeezing any money from me at all. Can you imagine? Over an hour and not one penny extracted from the taxpayer.
I counted myself lucky. I have a smart a$$ mouth and tend to wield it against my own best self-interest but I kept it in check. I pointed the 136 horsepower missile down the road and tooled off at 45 mph enjoying the rest of the sunny afternoon and warming my butt on the heated seat.
After the county sheriff and state police were called in to assist, they all agreed that there was no law in Ohio against openly carrying a handgun while on a motorcycle, doing handstands, running backward, or any other means of locomotion. The speed trap then tried to do what speed traps do by attempting to issue me a citation for speeding. I pointed out that he had not stopped me for speeding or any other traffic offense and that he had admitted that to the other two cops, who were still standing there. That went around for a while until I was begrudgingly let go without squeezing any money from me at all. Can you imagine? Over an hour and not one penny extracted from the taxpayer.
I counted myself lucky. I have a smart a$$ mouth and tend to wield it against my own best self-interest but I kept it in check. I pointed the 136 horsepower missile down the road and tooled off at 45 mph enjoying the rest of the sunny afternoon and warming my butt on the heated seat.