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Now that we're married...
- Thread starter cbright
- Start date
I hate to admit it, but when you get one, you'll still be wotking on it too.
I had a friend who went to Sul Ross. She liked it there.
Also, from what I have heard, the french call a cigarette a faggot, and the English shorten it to fag. So, over there, lighting a fag for someone is a gesture of kindness.
Also, I do believe it is time for me to butcher that song by Brad Paisley.
"She says that if I buy one more gun, she is gonna leave me.
"I'm gonna miss her...."
Also, I do believe it is time for me to butcher that song by Brad Paisley.
"She says that if I buy one more gun, she is gonna leave me.
"I'm gonna miss her...."
The truth is that I was married from 2004 to 2008 and have a beautiful daughter from that union.
I am a Christian, yet still an imperfect man, and I will correct my original comment by saying that it is good to be married to create a family unit for having children.
My problem with it is the way that it's done now a days. I believe that a man and a woman can commit themselves to one another before God and stay with one another for their lifetime.
I don't believe that a man in a suit has to ordane this union or that a government should charge a tax on it.
My step brother's wife recently left him for another woman. The court gave her the children. He is paying child support and is being forced to pay for the house that his children and ex-wife live in along with her new girlfriend. He is also having to support himself which is almost impossible for him to do now.
The "law", if you will, has inexplicably been layed out to favor the mother in almost all if not all divorce situations.
It is wrong. Period
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I can speak from both sides of the marriage argument. First marriage was a horrible disaster with a horrible person, young and dumb rushing into the unknown that turned into a minefield, and I'd love a time machine to go back and kick myself square in the nuts right before I met her. My wife now is wonderful and we're still in love and very happy together 11 years later, and it really has been life changing.
My own concepts for relationship happiness will not apply to all, but likely for most. Unless otherwise stated, my suggestions are gender neutral as I'd give the same advice to my son or daughter and the same thing I tell them applies here, "I'm not smarter, I've just lived longer and had more time to fuck up and learn from it." In the information age, some of the below advice is more important than ever.
My own concepts for relationship happiness will not apply to all, but likely for most. Unless otherwise stated, my suggestions are gender neutral as I'd give the same advice to my son or daughter and the same thing I tell them applies here, "I'm not smarter, I've just lived longer and had more time to fuck up and learn from it." In the information age, some of the below advice is more important than ever.
- The dating and engagement timeline is an in-depth interview process, and should be measured in years and never months. At no time should one feel bound to the other throughout the whole time to the alter, but after that it is very tricky to get out. Scrutinize to the fullest and for fuck's sake, no combining finances or paying any bills for the other until married.
- Anytime you get a call/text or knock and think "Fuck that, I don't want to talk to them", that's what detectives call a clue. Walk away.
- Never try to be a fixer or a saver. If they're broken from the onset, get rid of them because you are never going to be the solution or savior. Research their past, meet their friends and family, interact often and in vastly different situations, and see what kind of person they really are.
- If they have a personality disorder, run fast and long in the other direction. Specifically bipolar (manic), histrionic, narcissistic, and for fuck's sakes no borderlines or antisocial, fucking ever, because they are the fucking mayor of crazy town. These will drain your very soul and are not worth breeding with in the first place, much less sharing your daily life with.
- Speaking of breeding, think before you breed. No birth control measures are 100% while both are fertile and while marriage isn't 100%, parenthood is truly til death do you part. If you want to fuck with zero chance of permanent ties, there's surgeries for that.
- Moral compatibility is vital. If you don't fundamentally agree politically and socially, it will most likely fail. Religiously can vary, but ethically had better be in solid step with each other. You will not change their mind either, just shake hands and walk away.
- The marriage is the most important business partnership you will ever enter into. If you aren't bringing equal efforts to the table, one will use and the other will spite. Whether this is a rock star homemaker/breadwinner duo or a powerhouse pair of breadwinners, balance is necessary. Everyone has bad spells but when that balance tips too far for too long, fix it quick or hit the door.
- Speaking of business, it's a 50/50 partnership and no one gets control over the other. Want an employee to boss around and have no respect for, go to Craigslist personals and hire one.
- Financial agreement is a must. You don't have a business partner and keep your books separate because that doesn't work, a marriage is no different. Household budgeting together will go far towards cohesion on everything else, and remember a budget means spending less than you make while holding each other to that commitment. Always have money in the bank with the bills paid, and never have a fight over money.
- The man better be a man and the woman better be a woman, no room for girl and boy behavior. Contrary to tictac belief, there really are differences in the sexes. Act your sex.
- If one mentions anything to the tune of "Adulting is too hard" bullshit, kick their ass to the curb and keep looking. Same goes for the line of "I want to take (or already took) a year off to find myself...". Waste of flesh.
Pussy has ruined a lot of good men.............Very well put
No truer words have ever been spoken.
One example would be that red headed guy named Harry of the "Royal" family.
WTF? The only redneck? Where? A&M or some school in Austin?
I mean, other than the pussy that you sorta claim to have gotten, none of which should have passed muster, why the fuck would you choose to attend such a liberal sounding faggot filled school? (Unless it was to just fit in)
Fuckkkkkk....
I find absolutely no flaw or need of editing
Well, many things are "wrong" or "illegal" but those "wrong" and/or "illegal" solutions happen every fuckin day
I do understand your argument
My opinion, be that what it is, is that "traditional" marriage and the nuclear family, along with the erosion of morality and the general demise of the US society as a whole ended when the need for a 2 earner household became the norm and the government began indoctrinating the youth in earnest.
This is why marriage in today's world is a lose-lose proposition for men. Don't do it.
I disagree, it’s only a losing proposition if you pick the wrong woman and/or fuck up badly while in it.
Look at it like buying a piece of property. First, don’t pounce on the first one you find, check out the competition and don’t let emotions overwhelm proper judgement. Second, do a solid home inspection and scrutinize it for weaknesses. Third, skip “fixer uppers” and properties that don’t meet your every expectation and need. Fourth, make sure you’re protected at the purchase and know exactly what you’re signing. Fifth, care for the property and make improvements and investments to increase its value while mitigating depreciation as it ages.
Finally, don’t be afraid to walk away from a stress filled money pit if you failed at the above, even if it’s at a loss.
The first wife made zero earnings over 11 years of marriage, was (and still is) a horrible mother and homemaker, never saw an paycheck of mine she didn’t already have spent in her mind, and cost me close to a half mil to get rid of but was still worth every penny to do so. I chose so badly, it’s laughable.
Current wife earns every bit as much as I do, if not more some years. She’s loving, loyal, and keeps up the house despite working more hours than I do. She’s frugal and every bit as conservative as I am, and she encourages and supports my shooting as much as I do her quilting (which shockingly is every bit as expensive).
There’s as many shitty men out there as there are shitty women. They deserve each other. Just make sure you’re picking from the right candidate pool.
I'd say your a pretty good example of it being a loosing proposition.
You lost half a million dollars and only got it right on your second attempt (hopefully it stays that way).
If you couldn't get it right the first time, what makes you think other young men are going to somehow magically get it right the first time?
Or anyone for that matter?
Also perhaps the only reason you actually got it right the second time is due to not only your age but the age of your second wife.
Younger women tend to be way more problematic and hard to predict if they will go evil than much older women who may also not be on their first marriage.
But that comes with it's own set of problems as it's hard to start a family and have a bunch of kids with a woman after they reach a certain age.
I wouldn't talk down to any men if I were you, if you couldn't get it right the first go around, what makes you think others can do so easily?
Also remember this is NOT the world you grew up in, society has gotten way worse than when you were first getting married and the non-stop propaganda and social pressure on women to go evil is relentless, intrusive, pervasive and non-stop.
I don’t discount anything you say, especially the age factor, but I do disagree with you saying I’m talking down to anyone. Everything I posted is nothing other than cautionary advice learned through mistakes and successes, and nothing more. Current social environment does present its own challenges, but there are still millions of young women out there who aren’t IG or tictac attention whores who just want a good man who works hard and respects her, just as there’s millions of good young men who are and want the same. It’s a complicated matter of sorting the chaff from the grain to make sure one is getting what they want from the other and vice versa.
My posting what I have isn’t an attempt to convince anyone one way or another, instead to promote a thought process in the event some guy or gal actually is in a relationship that is potentially toxic. Had I read what I typed twenty-some years ago, I may have avoided what I went through. Good people really do exist, as do bad people, and we need to keep them separated as much as possible for our country and society to prosper because it’s far easier to turn good to bad than it is to turn bad to good.
If someone wants to rent their whole life because it’s easier living with no ties or maintenance, great, but that doesn’t mean home buyers are stupid and guaranteed to get fucked over.
Adding to my previous comment of faith based marriage.
When we were expecting our first child, we decided that it made more sense to have my wife be an at home mom. She may have been able to make a little more income than the cost of day care but that would mean someone else was spending as much time with our son as she would be able to and that was not what we wanted. She has never worked outside of the home and we have relied only on my income. It made for some tight times but raising a family was more important to us that having lots of material items.
When our oldest was in school (in Oregon) we took him out of public school because of the gay life teaching that was occurring while he was in the second grade. Note this was in 1992. After moving to Idaho, primarily because of a smaller and more conservative community, we ended up taking all of the kids out of public school because it was starting there. They were home schooled after that. Huge time and money commitment to do this but well, well worth it.
Our kids are adults now with our oldest son and daughter now married. Both met their spouses through church or church related activity. Both have spouses that could not be better in terms of values and outlook on life. Son's kids are being home schooled. Expect our daughter's kids will be also.
Having a strong marriage and raising good, decent kids is a lot of work and requires a lot of sacrifice. With today's 'Me First' entitlement attitude, I am not surprised there are so many divorces as well kids being raised in broken homes thinking this is normal. Then we wonder why it perpetuates to the next generation.
And then the parents whose grown children are losers have the balls to tell you that you were lucky to have law abiding, successful, responsible grown children. That's when I go off on those idiot parents.
