Maggie’s Funny & awesome pics, vids and memes thread (work safe, no nudity)

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Home from Vietnam, stationed at Ft. Carson, learning how to snow ski, driving my hot little Vega GT on curvy mountain roads to the ski area, listening to the New Christy Minstrals singing. (damn that little GT could corner good even if the engine was kinda accountant oriented (instead of engineered)

It was a good time, even if the Army decided one more time this INFANTRY MAN, needed to be a clerk typist…..I couldn’t type :(.
 
Why would you even attempt this?

Don't ask questions you may not want the answer to.

Sadly, sometimes when people get old, allergies can pop up that never existed before or the severity of which may have be muted by youthful vigor are now released like the Kraken.

Consuming dairy has a few effects on me now which are quite pronounced and very uncomfortable especially if I consume it on a regular basis.

One is lymph nodes start swelling and circulation goes to shit. Another is the left leg swells like a balloon and crusty, bleeding, pus oozing sores form on my calf. Sinuses get totally clogged and I also get a permanent nose bleed, like every time I blow my nose it's 70% blood and scab mixed with 30% snot. My ass becomes a mud laser and bleeds like a stuck pig. The diarrhea and ass bleeding only takes one bowl of cereal and milk or one ice cream cone, the rest takes a little time to build up.

Stop consuming dairy for a couple three weeks and all those symptoms start subsiding.

But I like cheese, who doesn't, and the thought of eating cheese weakens my mind like a pronoun splitting incel listening to a Kamaltoe speech on a tape loop so I fall for the marketing once in a while an try it.

Sentenced to life without cheese. Probably karma, maybe I was Genghis Kahn's torch bearer in a former life and burned down hundreds of villages.

Some claim there are pic rules in this thread but I haven't seen those rules.

It kinda looks like this only more blood and more pus. Doctor's call it eczema and prescribe a spray which helps the sores but doesn't do anything for the swelling, diarrhea, nosebleeds or ass bleeds.

iu
 
I recently tried non-dairy mozzarella.

It does NOT melt like real cheese no matter what they say and it has the chew texture of wet tissue paper but less flavorful.

iu
Back in 2016, we were preparing a back country elk pack trip- my uncle, cousin, his 10yo step daughter and me. I had my wife pick up my portion of the grocery list, which included bacon. Being helpful and health-conscious, she dutifully did the shopping and loaded the cooler.
Day one in camp, 9 head of stock and a very comfortable camp set up, we started shaking out supplies for breakfast. Eggs, check, toast, check, turkey bacon ch… what the hell??!! Never heard the end of that- bringing turkey bacon to elk camp- blasphemy!! Needled and prodded about that all week and still, every time we talk, someone has to bring up the turkey bacon SNAFU.